Women suck at computers
Computers are all over the place: the bank, the sciences, the workplace — in other words, places where women are not. Is this a coincidence? You bet your ass that no it isn’t.
Women face countless problems in their pipe-dream of equality. The biggest being that the whole notion is childish and only realistic to an insane person or someone who has never had a job.
Women also suck at computers.
It’s the same way that men suck at being happy when their best friend gets dumped and then has to rely on them for emotional support. That just doesn’t make the kind of sense to us.
Computers are that way for women.
You see, women don’t understand computers because they don’t understand the basics of cause and effect — that the one causes the other. It’s childlike in its simplicity, I know, but it’s absolutely true.
This backwards mentality applies to computers just as easily as it applies to every other aspect of a woman’s life, which she is right about to hopelessly fuck up yet again by doing the exact same thing and expecting it somehow to magically work this time.
I saw this in action just yesterday while waiting in line for an ATM at the bank. For some absurd reason, a woman had been put in charge of her own finances and had promptly lost her ATM card in the machine. She started frantically pressing buttons, expecting that at any moment something profoundly contrary to what had happened was about to happen. Guess what. It didn’t.
What I’m saying here is that men are better than women because every time a man drops a rock in to a ditch, he knows it’s going to fall. Women think that if they do it enough, it will turn into a Snicker’s bar.
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Quite.
Them gmail accounts must have some really wicked spam control, the way their owners keep dishing them out and all.
But if we were to be really fair we’d just have to compare the oses only.
No third party additions and ugly hacks running in user mode…
That mighty sexy cli of yours sure would measure up to this.
So what if linux users and developers are masochists and sadists respectively? Lame excuse that doesn’t detract an ounce away from the sheer amount of crappiness.
People who aren’t masochist must really be dumb and/or unmanly, eh?
Drop it with the Id games already. We all know Carmack’s got a hardon for underage penguins.
And still you need that lousy wrapper. Anyone out there still launching with ogl codepaths in addition to d3d? I thought so.
And even he’ll see the light eventually and leave you people for dead.
And besides, last time I read, doom ran slower cause of lacking SIMD optimisation for the tux release.
Run hl2ep1, I dare ya. Run SupremeCommander, etc…
Run anything I run right out of the box without fiddling and hacking with it for days. Especially d3d releases. And run it faster.
I rest my case.
- Benassi Bros&Sandy-Illusion
I don’t know what you’re talking about, but you’re not female, so I know you’re right.
How many Linux programmers are women? Think about it. Windows has all sorts of programming tools (Visual Studio .NET, etc.) that pretty much tell you exactly what to do when you’re programming. Linux doesn’t have that. You have to actually use your brain, memorizing all sorts of functions, classes, and headers, while in VB.net, it gives you a list of everything you can put in a certain segment of code and tells you what it does and how to use it.
Sonyad: Did you just get called a woman by a man who says “whoopsie-daisy”? LMAO.
Whoopsie-daisy. Forgot to include my E-mail. (Mushroomjay@gmail.com)
Ah, in response to both my respected Necroswordsman and most likely woman Sonyad.
Sonyad:
http://www.winehq.com/ - I’m playing DOOM 3 right now in workspace 2.
http://beryl-project.org/ - Because having a resource efficient stylistic, and flexible (pun partially intended) install is not in Microsoft’s work book.
(some examples of Beryl, go to youtube and search for Beryl.)
Necroswordsman:
Mac OSX is built on Unix, which was a great move by Apple, so with a bit of work in either of their terminals, you can run both executable files from them.
Anyway, back on subject: Why Women Suck at Computers.
(If you’d like to continue this argument feel free to E-mail me.)
Better yet, use an Apple computer.
You’re completely correct. Linux is a mainstream os. On the heels of windy, it is. Honest.
Linux is so good and totally not an ugly hack&crapware you’ll even be able to play directx 9 and eventually even dx10 games on it.
When hell freezes over.Also, it’s most certainly not a resource hog. x11 and the desktop environments are actually performance, quality software and not ugly, pathetic resource hogging hacks running in user space.
There’s a huge application base available for the various distros that is all NOT comprised of obscenely lame, useless crapware. Already enviable to windy users it will only continue to grow and better itself into the foreseeable future.
There’s lots of high end software houses that cater complex, high quality, high performance software applications specifically to the average desktop linux user for the inherent dough to be made of it.
You’ll never have any trouble with dependencies or version conflicts and discrepancies between the various hackware and crapware involved on your system.
Because backwards compatibility on linux runs circles around windows, in actuality. And in general, backwards compatibility for (free) open source software and technical support thereof and technical feedback is flawless compared to evil, closed source. Especially m$.
Linux is ‘pretty much’ almost bug free anyway, compared to windy.
Ubuntu never corrupted anyone’s CMOS. Those are only m$ fud and malicious libel against poor ol’ Tux.
And so what? That’s just something any proper os ought to do to their hapless, unsuspecting users. Corrupt your cmos for no fucking reason thereby rendering hardware inoperable!
Test user worthiness, you see. Because everyone knows, or should, what a cmos is and how to reflash your bios or reset the cmos using the reset jumper.
Serves you right if you can’t be bothered to review and patch the whole of lots of coder wannabe and the odd proficient programmer’s mistake.
Or if, God forbid, you can’t code.
It should be mandatory to do this to people every other week so as to reaffirm their continued worthiness of the honour the penguin bestowed upon thee through its mere presence.
You should and might even be able to, if the planets line up properly and Female’s on the rag, run the odd windy application under tux at comparatively unacceptable levels of performance and reliability using vmware, wine or some ugly hack or other.
While you’re at it, why not also scratch behind the left ear with the big toe of your right foot.
Let’s be silly just for the hell of it.Seems all linux fans worked as technical support personnel at one point before their tastes in oses ‘matured’ and ‘refined’…
And more guns = ‘less crime’…
Bullshit? For sure.
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Use Linux. Windows is for mundanes.
Becuase having a penguin or a three nippled frisbee for a logo is really sexy and it doesn’t matter how awful a hack some crapware is if it’s published under the gnu.
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- Nelly Furtado - All Good Things (Come To An End)
How many Window programmers were men?
Game over.
Ahh, this is a wonderful subject. I’m very, very glad you’ve done this one Great Man Dick.
A few questions for the women out there:
Have you ever used a command line? Yes, even the weak MSDOS counts. Ok, once you’ve accomplished that, check your operating system. Chances are it’s Windows? Now, nothing wrong with using obsolete technology, I mean if it does what you want, then good. Now, I personally use Linux. I love to have complete and utter control of my entire system. This way when an error occurs, I know it’s my fault. Now me owning the manly-mind I do I write everything I do to the operating system and save it. This way I can refer to it, undo it, or edit it so the error doesn’t occur again.
Now, having this ability I pretty much have a flawless Operating System. As we all know there are two other mainstream Operating Systems, Mac OSX, and Windows XP/Vista. We all know OSX has very few viruses due to the structure of it, while Windows which was built very poorly with many bugs and glitches. Anyway, enough OS flaming, back on subject. Most Man-only operated computers often contain little to no viruses, as we should know viruses are let in by the user (Windows users) so any virus the user let’s in is the users fault.
Now, I really wish I could take a survey of this but I cannot as I do not have the time nor resources to get best results, however I’m very sure we know what they are.
Woman operated computers almost always have a higher number of viruses and internal system errors from my previous experiences with giving technical help. Now from this I’ve driven out a ratio. Every 2:3 women have problems with their computers.
They often complain about this. Have they once taken the time to study alternatives to a superior work and play environment?
No.
Ok, so you’re a woman and you’re reading this in disgust, but you yourself ironically have viruses on your hard drive. (AKA the area where data is stored)
Let’s do a “Google Fight”
Ok, it turns out there’s an estimated 33,400,000 (thirty-three million) results for Linux Advice (exact wording)
Now, we can imagine most of that advice is for new users, so you’re pretty much safe.
Pretty much there’s no reason to be wary or afraid to switch to Linux, the manly thing to do when computer problems come.
Now, as said in another fool-proof Dick-article women only conduct an estimated 30 searches per week, while men perform an average of 42 (my personally average is 57, but that’s another thing.)
Did you ever once consider searching for “Operating System alternatives” instead of “virus removal”?
I doubt it.
Instead of relying on Norton antivirus to remove your errors slowly and poorly, why not go through a total protective barrier which contains no viruses?
Because you are stupid and illiterate with computers.
Hope you enjoyed the read,
Jay
But the fact everything was saved, probably redundant.
No! We say women suck at computers because women don’t know shit about computers. Any man can tell you that.
Have you ever come on a computer a woman was using and minimise the window she was using? You would hear a shrill, blood-curdling scream akin to that of a banshee getting a broomstick broken up her ass.
And just as annoying is that look of complete amazement she has on her face when you reopen her window and sees that everything is okay. Then she proceeds to laugh it off, not even apologising for her crude behavior.
You got a point here, ok two points even.
Could have been a mac without ROM
No! We say women suck at computers because women don’t know shit about computers. Any man can tell you that.
Have you ever come on a computer a woman was using and minimise the window she was using? You would hear a shrill, blood-curdling scream akin to that of a banshee getting a broomstick broken up her ass.
And just as annoying is that look of complete amazement she has on her face when you reopen her window and sees that everything is okay. Then she proceeds to laugh it off, not even apologising for her crude behavior.
You got a point here, ok two points even.
No! We say women suck at computers because women don’t know shit about computers. Any man can tell you that.
Have you ever come on a computer a woman was using and minimise the window she was using? You would hear a shrill, blood-curdling scream akin to that of a banshee getting a broomstick broken up her ass.
And just as annoying is that look of complete amazement she has on her face when you reopen her window and sees that everything is okay. Then she proceeds to laugh it off, not even apologising for her crude behavior.
Because it’s colloquial speech for artistic effect, not some formal subpoena?
Just a thought.
I don’t play world of warcraft. But I can still put a heading and footer in a word file (Several people asked me too).
Do we ’suck at computers’ because we don’t play as much World of Warcraft?
You all pride yourselves on being better than women, educated better. Well why don’t you use proper English? Like saying women suck at computing. Or men are much better at computing. Just a little suggestion.
ya your right order nowadays women take men for granted and money. I find it intolerable when i hear about a woman complaining that a man isnt doing anything around the house when he pays for the house, the food, EVERYTHING. And you want him to cook, and clean everything too. A man is not a panzie if you want that your gonna have to sacrifice ALOT of money in the process.
Nina, everything you typed made absolutely no sense what so ever, until the part where you revealed that you were 16, then it all came together. Another young, confused, hate stricken feminist has fed you propoganda and other bullshit. Young feminists like yourself are no different from Hitler Youth’s. Same agendas, driven by blind hatred, never really having a productive state of mind. But for your sake, let me answer some of your questions. Who gave birth to my stupid ass? Certainly not your worthless self. Dose the female donkey have a name? Hell I don’t know, but I know the female dog’s name, and that’s certainly what you’re coming across as. So, we won’t get far like the hot manly men that apparently we are not? What the hell do you know about “hot manly men”? You’re young, and like most young feminazi’s a “hot manly man” has either a massive penis, or a massive bank account. Anna Nicole Smith didn’t marry an 89 year old ill guy because he was a “hot manly man”. In the eyes of the stupid (women), all men are hot, even the ugly bastards like Louis Anderson, Mike Tyson, Richard Simmons, and these guys find all kinds of ways to get laid. Now, as a man, why should I think twice about what I say in public? I’m not afraid to let the truth out, and if you’re a man who supresses it, chances are you’re a bitch. I certainly don’t see you making a big deal about how The Feminazi Movement doesn’t think twice about the shit they spew out so often. And I don’t consider myself a “sexist pig”. I consider myself a man who tells the truth with using a concise form of expression. I would have more respect for how women do things, if they ever did them right for the most part.
“Look it up women are doing more now, we don’t cow down to your shit anymore, were independant and kicking your ass.”
Doing more what? Complaining? Hell yes they are. They never want to shut up either, which brings me to my next point. When have women “cowed down to our shit” in your lifetime? Women have been cowing down to their own shit for decades, not wanting to do anything with themselves, depending on men, waiting for us to bring the goods home. And once they file their divorce papers, guess who gleas in happiness over money that they’ve never rightfully earned but somehow managed to attain? Freakin’ lazy ass women. That’s who. You’re independant and kicking our ass? You’re 16. Go back to school and blow something up in the chemist’s lab, delinquate.
Listen up? Ok i listened. It was great because you think its funny to talk about people being sexually abused i bet you laugh about it because you got fucked in the ass by somebody young. And you bled like a stuck pig, and you enjoyed it. But now its my turn to tell your youngen ass whats ^. Were not jackasses i do have a donkey though ;). You cant be too mad because you never go to the anti-men feminist sites and jibber blabber your big dick sucken lips off. Im actually very manly i have a body builder type built, along with i can lift my own body weight plus 130 pounds. You think you would hit me in public id spit in your face bitch, then id pull down your pants and spit in your cunt. Fuck you, you women still suck dick still do laundry, still clean, and your man that wants to get married to you dont wanna hear your shit comprende? Cuz heel throw your ass on the streets were you can make the bank. And die of AIDS. Women have the chance to whore around young but when you get off marrying age you better keep your mouth shut and legs open otherwise youl be in DEEP SHIT!