Women Want To Fuck Squid
Women are as adventurous with their culinary tastes as waiting in line for a ski lift — a ski lift that leads to the DMV.
Would the lady care for some calamari this evening?
Ew, gross! It’s squid!
How about some veal?
Ew, gross! I care more about baby cows than I do about the African children who mined these diamond earrings!
And everyone knows it.
Women hate to eat anything new. They hate to try anything new as well. That’s where the phrase “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks” comes from. They’re talking about women.
Ever wonder why no one has invented a new sexual position in a thousand years? It’s because women won’t try them out and won’t pass them on. I’ve invented three myself, but they’ll die with me because the women I’ve tried them with said they were “stupid” and “uncomfortable”.
I’ll tell you what’s “stupid” and “uncomfortable”; going to a Married With Children Series Finale wrap party and have your date walk up to Griff saying, “Oh my god! You’re the cop aren’t you!”
No, honey. He’s just black.
Oysters, calamari, snails, and other gross delicacies are great appetizers precisely because they’re gross. Grossness is the ultimate aphrodisiac.
Why do you think women are so in love with French men? It’s not because French men are romantic. They talk like they have marbles in their fucking mouths. Is the teacher from the Peanuts cartoons romantic? No.
French men are disgusting. And that makes them irresistible to women.
All the French get 200 Man Points for that. I don’t know what the conversion rate for Man Points is these days, but if I recall correctly, whoever belongs to the country currently at war gets the multiplier.
La guerre est masculin.
Aphrodisiac is a Greek word for something that kick-starts a woman’s dormant sexual desires to fuck a football team and lands them right in your lap. While you and I, as men, look at squid, oysters, and all creatures on Earth as food, women see everything as a sexual Rorschach. It’s how God made them.
Sea creatures, and by extension sea food, arouse women’s sexual fantasies. That’s why they won’t eat them.
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August 6th, 2007 at 8:28 pm - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
And there we go, you have admitted that you think women simply deserve to be treated like shit for the fact that they won’t have sex with you. Talk about self-justification for being an asshole. I hope it all works out for you, but I just can’t see how that will be possible.
August 6th, 2007 at 8:32 pm - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
Does experimenting with their sexuality involve the fact that you fuck anyone who is a sell out, and yet make a bigger point about who, you like totally wouldn’t touch with a 10-foot pole.
I was used. I know your type far better than you sluts could know yourselves. I’ve learned every single come-back there is, and I know how to break a gurl’s spirit in less than 5 minutes. I know that girls only fuck when they’re insecure, so if I make them insecure, they fuck me. And they make it too fucking easy. I just talk to them about entertainment like they do with their friends, and I know exactly what they’ll say. I master the conversation, and I make it clear that I dominate them. They feel sad and depressed, but are forced off their social ground and have to retreat into themselves.
I have lost count of how many numbers I have gotten that way.
Now when I treated them well, tried to ask about their feelings, their interests, you know what happened to me? They, like, totally thought I was, like, sooo unfab, and so I got the joy of being snickered at and made fun of.
You seem to believe that being bullied by someone who can never face you head-on is not only justified but therapeutic. Maybe there’s a reason the only three uses you had to your company were as eye-candy, to fill up the quotas/double standard (see eye candy), and as a fuck-toy.
Being that you would just as soon sue your management for sexual harassment as do any real work, they saw that it would be best to push you aside and only use you when absolutely necessary.
Maybe it’s because you just naturally piss people off, have to hide behind your gender for protection, and don’t know where you are not welcome.
August 6th, 2007 at 8:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
That’s no doubt because they can see through your insincere creepy act of being a nice guy when you so clearly aren’t one.
You don’t get their number because you treat them like sluts, you get the number because you are being genuinely who you are, not a freak who is trying to act like a nice guy when he so clearly isn’t one. And again, if you get the number of a slut, then don’t cry when she just uses you for sex, as you are clearly just using her.
August 6th, 2007 at 8:39 pm - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
You can’t see a lot of things. You can’t seem to comprehend the fact that gurlz deserve to be treated like shit. Have you ever seen Paris Hilton or ‘My Sweet 16?’ The 16 year old ‘tarty’ sluts are immature for their age. Paris Hilton is sure as fuck immature for her age.
I assume she was disinherited because her grandfather was a misogynist. Well, that seems to be the cureall for an actual argument these days, but it’s far from the truth. Even though the media portrays celebrities as Goddesses and Gods, they are still responsible for their own actions. Imagine if a man from a prominent family cried and bitched in a courtroom. And he showed up with half of his privates showing. He would end up in a Fire Bird in the bottom of a lake with two bullets in his head.
Thank God for double-standards, huh?
August 6th, 2007 at 8:45 pm - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
Say what? I would love to be used for sex. No, it’s when they aren’t fucking ready to put out because they, like, want it to be special. And then they go and fuck your best friend because you weren’t fucking cool enough or didn’t wear the right clothes. You gurls are the biggest fucking cunts out there, and I’ve found out how to get pussy.
Female, the fact is, I know how to be myself and still get a slut to put out. I don’t need to elaborate on the facts with you. You’re just a silly little girl who doesn’t know what she wants. I mean, if you can’t see what’s in front of you, how can you see yourself in a mirror?
I’ve never been used for sex. I’ve been used for everything else, but not sex. I’ve bought sluts meals, cigarettes, clothes, chocolate, flowers… But for some reason, my acceptance and gratitude was not enough. For some reason, Female here thinks I should default back to that even though my current system works not only so much better, but feels better for me.
You are really shattering those misconceptions about how whores are stupid, Female.
August 6th, 2007 at 8:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
I suggest you turn off your TV, as most of us already know that it doesn’t reflect reality. Not every girl is Paris Hilton or aspires to be her. Any young girl with brains would think Paris was an idiot. Any older female might instead think she is one seriously business savvy individual. She has made a multi-million dollar business out of herself and her antics. Talk about branding.
And you can thank the media (mostly controlled by men) and paparazzi (again, mostly men) for allowing her to cash in. I doubt it matters that gramps has disinherited her, she is wealthy in her own right just for making a spectacle of herself. And the more you talk about her and obsess about her, the more $$ she will make. Get over Paris.
Yeah, that explains why Michael Jackson is now living like royalty in Dubai.
August 6th, 2007 at 8:51 pm - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
She’s going bankrupt and selling her house.
The average little girl I see appears as though she’s trying to look in, not tarty.
And that whole man thing - is that your new Jewish conspiracy?
August 6th, 2007 at 8:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
Doubt, one the one hand you say you would love to be used for sex, implying you don’t often have sex, and then you turn around and say that your current system of treating women like sluts works so well. I call bullshit.
There is only one way to get into a decent women’s pants, you have to be kind. If you can’t be kind, then don’t wonder when you end up with women at the bottom of the barrel.
August 6th, 2007 at 8:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
And the whole antics thing? Well it worked for her. Go to any ratty street corner and you can see three or four Anna Nicoles and Paris Hiltons who didn’t quite make it. I’m sure they love the sex as much as your next woman, though. Wow, standing with half of your genitals showing, getting negative attention, getting robbed, beat, and murdered - the life of a whore is really something, isn’t it?
Truly the pinnacle of a girl’s existence.
August 6th, 2007 at 8:58 pm - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
No, I just like sex. You can’t really comprehend that concept, can you, because god knows your superior ass will wait for a man to initiate the contact. You gurls are just so high and mighty, aren’t you? So much better than us apish brutes. Well, I’m just sorry for having a penis.
August 6th, 2007 at 9:00 pm - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
There are more women in the world who aren’t prostitutes or celebrities than there are. Again, turn off the television and stop frequenting the red-light district. If you really want to blame increasing prostitution on anything, blame it on drugs and the poverty trap.
August 6th, 2007 at 9:03 pm - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
Okay, that gave me a hearty laugh. There’s no need to apologise for your appendage, apologise instead for being ignorant and ruled by it.
LOL, I’m still laughing, thanks. So now you say that women should initiate interest straight after complaining that they are sluts and that makes them worthless. Okay, then let me try and unravel your illogic.
Women are sluts.
Women suck because they are sluts.
Women are great because they are sluts and freely give out.
Women shouldnt be sluts but they should act like sluts by being more sexually aggressive than men.
Your position is nothing but contradictory.
August 7th, 2007 at 2:16 am - IP Man-Hash: 42c969685cd0a
At least he belongs here. You don’t. Like a black person at a KKK rally.
August 7th, 2007 at 2:21 am - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
No, they should just appreciate the world we’ve made and understand that as girls, they’re just along for the ride. Girls who are sluts just suck as people. Girls who use their slutiness to manipulate others are even worse than people. Girls who break promises are world-class losers - even if it means they don’t have to put out.
And you just seem to naturally piss people off, don’t you? There’s a reason you gurlz need to learn how to shut the fuck up - again.
August 7th, 2007 at 2:48 am - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
Or… I could blame it on the gurlz who choose to become prostitutes. They have no-one for themselves to blame, be it for making some very poor decisions in life or having someone make those decisions for them. There is no excuse for being a slutty little disease trap, which is why whenever you sluts go on stage, it’s just like high school. We aren’t laughing with you, we’re laughing at you. It’s just funny that still after all these years you rely solely on your body to garner any scrap of attention.
August 7th, 2007 at 4:13 am - IP Man-Hash: 576202da90258
I’ve already blamed that on feminism.
Throughout the history of humankind, women have always been whores or groupies of some sort, but it was only at the dawn of feminism did the whole concept of being a super-groupie (or whatever the hell that is) evolve.
One prominent feminist, (who Dick has already named as a cunt and a whore) was a ‘pioneer’ in the whole super-groupie thing. This is the type of role model that feminists have, and she clearly shows what a strong woman is all about … selling her body for money/goods/services/attention.
Feminism says that it is okay to be a whore, and women are too daft to think for themselves so they lap up all that nonsense and run straight onto the street corner. Look back at history in the 20th Century and tell me if the whole concept of a girl working in a strip-club to put herself through college happened before the feminist bullshit commonly known as the sexual revolution.
August 7th, 2007 at 4:23 am - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
If college tuition wasnt astronomically expensive, Im sure women wouldnt be flocking to work in strip clubs (assuming they are flocking), or do you think they are there because they want to be? Besides, you can lay equal blame on the punters, if they werent so keen to see the flesh, these places wouldnt exist - there wouldnt be a market for them. Lastly, at least women are using the money to get an education, would be far worse if they just made stripping their number one career choice.
And frankly, I am surprised you are so against women having both brains and a body. I would have thought these women would be your fantasy ideals.
August 7th, 2007 at 5:08 am - IP Man-Hash: 71d0be43b04c7
I would have thought that it would be less-than-fair that because some CEO oil-baron figurehead donates half of his salary to sluts, I have to pay about 5 cents more for gas. I don’t care if it’s to a slut or to finance a coup in Central America, it’s wrong and I’m left footing the tab.
And the whole stripping thing? You seem so eager, slut, to paste the blame on anything and anyone but - the people who make a conscious decision to work there.
No personality and out of touch with reality - another reason why your kind are not allowed on this site.
I imagine the reason you, female, must brandish cleavage and keep waving that gender card around is that if everyone around you didn’t suck as much as you as a person or want to fuck you, you’d be like a social repellent. I can swear you don’t smell pretty, you are in an artistic sense ugly-as-fuck, and you can’t really make an argument without contradicting yourself and leaning your bloated chest against the double-standard.
Oh, and one more thing. I believe the world would be a better place if everyone still went to see sluts, but never paid them.
August 7th, 2007 at 5:31 am - IP Man-Hash: 42c969685cd0a
Always Germain Greer. It’s like she is the sites unofficial nemesis.
But she’s just our village idiot. Just FYI, Female is not the sites nemesis, but the village bicycle. Every one’s had a ride on her!
August 7th, 2007 at 5:40 am - IP Man-Hash: 576202da90258
There is nothing wrong with men paying women to strip for them. The men are simply paying the women to throw away their dignity.