Women Want To Fuck Squid
Women are as adventurous with their culinary tastes as waiting in line for a ski lift — a ski lift that leads to the DMV.
Would the lady care for some calamari this evening?
Ew, gross! It’s squid!
How about some veal?
Ew, gross! I care more about baby cows than I do about the African children who mined these diamond earrings!
And everyone knows it.
Women hate to eat anything new. They hate to try anything new as well. That’s where the phrase “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks” comes from. They’re talking about women.
Ever wonder why no one has invented a new sexual position in a thousand years? It’s because women won’t try them out and won’t pass them on. I’ve invented three myself, but they’ll die with me because the women I’ve tried them with said they were “stupid” and “uncomfortable”.
I’ll tell you what’s “stupid” and “uncomfortable”; going to a Married With Children Series Finale wrap party and have your date walk up to Griff saying, “Oh my god! You’re the cop aren’t you!”
No, honey. He’s just black.
Oysters, calamari, snails, and other gross delicacies are great appetizers precisely because they’re gross. Grossness is the ultimate aphrodisiac.
Why do you think women are so in love with French men? It’s not because French men are romantic. They talk like they have marbles in their fucking mouths. Is the teacher from the Peanuts cartoons romantic? No.
French men are disgusting. And that makes them irresistible to women.
All the French get 200 Man Points for that. I don’t know what the conversion rate for Man Points is these days, but if I recall correctly, whoever belongs to the country currently at war gets the multiplier.
La guerre est masculin.
Aphrodisiac is a Greek word for something that kick-starts a woman’s dormant sexual desires to fuck a football team and lands them right in your lap. While you and I, as men, look at squid, oysters, and all creatures on Earth as food, women see everything as a sexual Rorschach. It’s how God made them.
Sea creatures, and by extension sea food, arouse women’s sexual fantasies. That’s why they won’t eat them.
Related Articles:
July 28th, 2007 at 10:49 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2559f72d0fa8d
Thank God I was born male, hahaha. Silly cunt.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2559f72d0fa8d
Maybe the reason it’s a man’s world is because men built the world.
Listen, female, why don’t you just abstain from cock if it gets you into so much trouble? It’s not like sex is good for you - ever seen a happy hooker? Just ask yourself, ‘Is social acceptance really worth the trouble?’ And besides, girls rock. We’re just Neanderthals. We no know what to do. Use that feminine brain of yours, girlies. Think yourself out of this mess you’ve gotten yourselves into.
July 28th, 2007 at 11:09 pm - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
And right on cue, you go back to talking about sex even though it has nothing to do with our discussion on domestic violence, but I guess it’s not your fault, adolescent males probably think about sex 24/7 and are unable to hold any other thought in their mind without it’s constant intrusion. No point talking to you, go back to your p0rn.
July 28th, 2007 at 11:14 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2559f72d0fa8d
Do you know how families are made? Do you know why those little whores keep going back to their abusive hubbies to continue their picturesque existence?
Poor little lady. You have such sweeping generalizations.
July 28th, 2007 at 11:50 pm - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
Well Doubt, if you are trying to say that an abused woman stays with a battering partner just for the sex, then wouldn’t that contradict your often stated notion that women are incapable of enjoying sex?
The ways you try and win arguments are as follows:
1. Fantasize publicly about a female poster’s sexual organs so as to project an image of yourself as a freak for the purpose off intimidating or boring her off the boards, seeing as your intellect is mostly incapable of seeing her gone through the means of rational debate or discussion.
2. Resort to projection.
3. Raise illogical strawmen based on ridiculous reasoning so as to have a never ending waste of time discussion, during which you believe none of what you type but amazingly, believe you have pulled the wool over the eyes of the other person.
Your tactics are those of a boring troll and as it is impossible to have a rational discussion with you, there is simply no point in paying you any attention.
You are now on my ignore list, where you can enjoy the company of fellow fools, sots, MansVoice, Risk, ElChauv and Billy. Enjoy each other’s company, no doubt you will.
July 28th, 2007 at 11:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: ff4893678328d
Most people who know me classify me as a gentlmen. I may have yelled whore, slut at women bitches who come on this site but I have never made any insinuations about a women’s sexual organs. For the matter, I am a strong advocate of punishing rape whom Wolfe can tesify for.
Pray tell how have I resorted to projection? Or illogical strawmen arguments? If you post in a logical manner, I will refute your points as such. However, if you attempt to dictate with an ad hominem and get on the moral high ground, I have no qualms smacking you back down to earth.
I am a nice guy. To most women. But to the bitches who think nice guys are pushovers - I give them a good “fuck you whore” to remind them of their place in society.
Apparently, your inability to beat me (An asian guy at that) in arguments with logic have resulted in you calling me a “fool” alongside a great many men. What about the women who bash other men? Who make fun of men’s sexual organs? Who advocate castration? Oh, right, they are on your list of “ardent feminists” and “heroes of the world”. Heh, what hypocrisy.
July 29th, 2007 at 12:11 am - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
I would have thought the people on the ignore list would have been extremely pleased to have found themselves on it. Or has the disclaimer been changed to “some women are allowed”, or perhaps, the more likely, “all women are allowed but we just pretend they’re not cause we don’t want to come off as desperate.”
July 29th, 2007 at 12:25 am - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
I’m not sure how I could have possibly overlooked Coderch on the list, seeing he’s up there at number one in pink fluro highlighter. Also, just to keep you men company, I’ve included a woman called KellyMac. I’ve heard through a third party that Kelly has been bitching about me on her forum but I don’t have the inclination or interest to go and reed her screed. Good job fighting the assumption that women aren’t bitchy gossips, KellyMac, nice work.
July 29th, 2007 at 12:55 am - IP Man-Hash: a8014d2ff3afb
I am fine with being on your ignore list. I am just “not fine” when you attempt to classify us with your following assumptions of not being able to logically debate. Really, you fail to defeat us in any argument and you proclaim we are illogical etc. Well done.
Ooooo, whos the desperate one?
July 29th, 2007 at 1:29 am - IP Man-Hash: 0052844c57d8e
Most ‘arguments’ here are irrational and hyperbole, regardless of gender. There have been a few interesting discussions, but for the most part comments here are just as I described.
July 29th, 2007 at 1:50 am - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
I would go further and say that what the men on this site called “argument” are nothing more than ad hominem attacks on all women, and are therefore futile to respond to, let alone acknowledge.
July 29th, 2007 at 2:29 am - IP Man-Hash: 2559f72d0fa8d
Oh, not at all. Just because they do not enjoy it does not mean they are not compelled for cock. They’re just superior like that - superior, immature, young, spoiled little materialistic manipulative whores who deserve every little twine of their lives thrown right back at them.
You really are running out of things to say. It’s too bad everyone on your list consists of people whose views differ from your original, refreshing views which just happen to coincide with the whims of society.
Let me help you out here, sweet cheeks. If you want to change all of these horrible unrealistic stereotypes about shorties, you may want to look around you. You may surprise yourself in the realization that there is a whole universe outside of your little fantasy.
Chao!
July 29th, 2007 at 2:34 am - IP Man-Hash: 2559f72d0fa8d
That’s how she has always been. She just jumps from forum to forum, declares victory boldly in the face of overwhelming defeat, and would be a complete waste of time if it weren’t for the records she leaves to back up these ’stereotypes’ we must eliminate.
Note how she left out PC. His views were very biased against women and hateful against humanity in general, but she ignored him for her ignore list because he was not constantly calling her out on her lies and bluffs.
Female, an interesting and indignant way of admitting defeat, but I’m afraid I must accept your resignation on behalf of everyone else here. You’ll be missed. Take care.
July 29th, 2007 at 6:21 am - IP Man-Hash: bf1c132f6631e
Thats strange.
Is that not how most of the female posters (no offense) in here also argument?
July 29th, 2007 at 6:29 am - IP Man-Hash: bf1c132f6631e
What gender would this third party be?
Before you call it irrelevant, might I ask you why you pick on her for not “fighting the assumption” as you said, and in the same post acknowledge that you base the ignore on the word of a third party, without even checking if it is indeed true?
And if the “third party” is a woman, well then you are flaming KellyMac for gossiping, based on a source that does the same. And why ignore her when you have no idea if she actually did what you accuse her of?
July 29th, 2007 at 6:29 am - IP Man-Hash: 2587a5110b1e2
Being on this site, I dont even know what she is fighting for. It seems she is fighting for the sake of fighting.
July 29th, 2007 at 6:43 am - IP Man-Hash: 635bdc781f785
thxs, good job dick, great site. the “shoe” turned me on to it.
it’s funny because i just banned all chicks on my net-chess-table. the reason is simple. they nipick every move with no real strategy. in other words they spoil the game. so i put a ban on all woman.
not gay though, i love fuckin them, love their pussy and big tits. i just can’t stand being with them, in any way other than fuckin.
oh well, i just bookmarked this site and can’t wait to visit tomorrow.
dick, thxs again, your the best
July 29th, 2007 at 6:54 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
How totally uncalled for straw(o)men to be used since women being inferior is the actual argument.
- sultan - broken (sultan & tone depth)
July 29th, 2007 at 7:43 am - IP Man-Hash: c406e944e31e4
Talon, I am about to add you to the list but before I do so, the third party mentioned offhand the bitching by KellyMac; the third party was not gossiping but asking for advice, not that that should be any of your business and why are you continually posing me questions which will make me stay around on this site longer, when that is against the disclaimer you all so love to recall when it suits your purpose? That question is rhetorical btw, you can answer it, but I won’t be responding. Ignoring is in force.
SonyAD, you’re on the list too.
July 29th, 2007 at 7:48 am - IP Man-Hash: 51f86d6005c2d
How immature and womanly of you.