Women’s Blogs = Logs
Between jobs and drinking buddies, there are a lot of inane clutterings about the world men know little about. Sewing is one of them. Scrapbooking is another of these things. Scrapbooking is so womanly that I have banned myself from ever appearing in a scrapbook. Such a notion sickens me.
Life is meant to be lived, fellows and gentlemen. It’s not a science project. You don’t hit life with a noxious aerosol concoction of chlorine and formaldehyde and then mount it in a shadow box.
I am a man. I am the anti-scrapbook.
Another lame activity men know little about is called “blogging”.
The process of writing things down regularly and putting them on the internet is called blogging. In my research for this article, however, it seems to me that writing things down for about three months and putting them on the internet is called “blogging”.
What I also found during my research is that all internet blogs can be categorized thusly: blogs that are content rich and provide information or a unique perspective into given events and social phenomena, and blogs that are full of whiny shit and smiley faces.
In other words, blogs have as many genders as people.
Here’s some startling facts to shock and amaze you:
1. 95% of blogs are written by men.
2. The rest are absolute shit.
Women blog like they speak. They have limited vocabularies stunted by gingivitis and Teen Dream magazine, and all they do all day long is talk about themselves. Women hate themselves; and their blogs all suck because that’s all they fucking talk about.
Today I thought about my cats!
Tons of perverted guys are emailing me! Gross!
I have bipolar!
You do not fucking have bipolar.
You don’t have A.D.D. You don’t have dyslexia. You don’t have a slow metabolism. You don’t have psychic abilities. You don’t have trust issues. You don’t have any problems in the whole goddamn world. You just have a vagina and an internet account and not a clue how to use either.
Men, on the other hand, are so great and positive about ourselves that sometimes I tell a boring story about me even when I know it’s boring. I don’t even fucking care. Women just want to make themselves sound as dumb as possible, both in the real world and in their shit blogs — or should I say: shit logs? It’s how they attract mates.
Men will never stop trying to fix a problem. It’s in our man natures. That’s why the show House MD is such a great show. It’s realistic. Fuck Cosmo and seventeen, the real way to keep a man forever is to constantly behave like a hapless fuck up.
Write about what you love. A great man once told me that, or perhaps I figured it out for myself and also have enough humility to assign it to a great man. Do what you love. Maybe that’s what a great man once told me.
Well women hate themselves. That combined with their inability to write makes them a noxious concoction of shitty “blogging”.
Women can’t blog for shit. Men are better than women.
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Women weren’t allowed to fight and she did help, she saved Sparta by convincing the council to send their entire army to fight. I am beginning to wonder if you people even saw the same movie I did.
Yes it is fitting that I like the scene where justice and retribution were delivered and men were made to see that they should not disregard the words of a woman over someone else, just because that someone else happens to have a penis. I particularly liked the way she used his exact words to her, back to him. Satisfying.
As for the rest of your words, unfortunately again, I cannot understand them. Happy Easter.
…And you forgot to mention that the cowardly cunt was happy to let the men go off and do the fighting. Since she’s ’so tough’, she could have offered to help.
Yes, Female. We’re all equal. All! Completely equal!
And Anna Nicole Smith married for love, not money.
How can disregard or even contempt for what is perceived to be crass ineptitude or lack of morals or scrupules be tantamount to hate?
Your little self-important twat is deceiving you again.
Fitting that you should like that one scene best.
- Puretone - Addicted to bass
In other words, Female, the 300 contrived to make the male lawmakers look corrupt and unwise whilst the woman was portrayed as being wise, just and brave. How thoroughly typical. With that amount of anti-male bias in movies and the general media, no wonder alot of people have the erroneous belief that women are superior to men. In truth, every woman on the planet could die tomorrow and the internet would remain up and running; food would still be on the table; the electricity network wouldn’t crash and petroleum would still be at the pumps. About the only thing women are good for is giving birth and that will soon be surpassed by the artificial womb. Oh, I forgot… Women are also good at staffing call-centres. However, these days, Indian men are happy to do it for 1/10 the wages so…
And so, on goes the inevitable march of technology.
And women beware, the day is coming when every man will have Kylie’s arse in a box, under the bed!
Did you need to use the toilet during the scene when the queen addressed the council? Wake up, it was a misogynist society where even the queen was looked down upon because she was a woman. Notice also how none of the councillors thought to apologise to her after it was revealed that the man she killed was a traitor? They stood around chanting “traitor, traitor” like a bunch of fools, which they were. Realise also that the 300 would not have died had the male lawmakers used what is known as Logic and sent their entire army to begin with. Best scene of the movie was when she stabbed that guy and that didn’t take any special effects or human/animal creatures to enhance it.
Well that must be because either you say it in such a way that you sound as if you are joking, or, the women who you say this to could not be bothered getting into an argument with a person who is self-evidently wrong.
I say that all the time. I’ve never gotten any bullshit for it.
-Dick
Mr masterson. This gets better every time. I have friends who are girls but i’m not sure what to do about it because every time i get on here i see the truth, but then i go back out into the world and ignore it unless i see some 13 year old reading Tvweek or a dumb housewife fucking up at the bank. How do i stop this. And if i come out and say “men are better than fucking women” surely i’d have to put up with wave after wave of beastly womyn bullshit. Nobody needs that. What should i do.
Completely off topic though. 300 - was it a surprise to anyone that the queen decided to fuck the guy to get what she wanted instead of “like a spartan woman”(as if theyre any better than every other woman on the of the fucking planet) put a knife to his throat and tell him who pulls the strings?
I said to my friend as i left the theatre “Fucking oath Luke! i feel like i need to fight someon! A teenage girl with her boyfriend overhead and started laughing at me. Her boyfriend flipped me off - he being a 23 year old (she doesn’t half sound like a slut huh?) - so i knocked his front teeth out and walked home. One of the better things i’ve done this week.
I was so pumped that night i feared that i might break some of my shit so so i drank alot of gin and took some sleeping pills. Fuckin man points? I’m rocknroll baby.
Funny.
The trick to writing a blog is to add some interesting foresight to it so it is useful and people will read it for the insight instead of learning about your life.
Well, let’s put it this way: If you fuck a chick in the ass, it’s technically a blow-job.
Do you mean shit-logs? Because woman can spew colossal tree trunks of shit when.
So the other 5% should be called shlogs?
I may not be a blogger, but I do write my fair share of writing.
Right now I’m working on my great time travel comedic novel. I love trying to figure out the logic behind some of the great mysteries of the universe and to make people laugh. I hope to combine the two in this book.
Though, I must admit, I did blog for a while until I grew up and realized how boring my life was in text.
Brilliant. Brand new poster, long time lurker. I love this site Dick, you’re the man.
I can’t believe I miss this gem! On point once again, Mr. Masterson.
I would consider that a unique insight into a social phenomenon.
-Dick
WOOT FIRST COMMENT! *ahem*
My blog:
http://www.decayingsword.mabtw.com
Visit it!
I write about what I love indeed! But Dick, if I write about my keyboard being fucked up, yet mix it with philosophy, is it manly or womanly? (I really love my keyboard you know)