The Man Billboard — For Real
They told me it was impossible. They told me it was too expensive. They told me it was the stupidest thing they’d ever heard.
They were wrong.
Hold onto your man beans, fellows and gentlemen, while I present the ultimate plan for the ultimate fund raiser: The Man Billboard.
The Man Billboard
The Man Billboard is an erection in the name of manliness. It’s an erection in the name of that special majority of the commuting workforce who actually get the job done every day — and bust their man ass doing it. That majority is called ‘men’. The Man Billboard is also an erection in the face and hair of the of all those chubby-ankled secretaries — those worker she-bees and profemtionals, who do little more at work each day than text message their boyfriends and annoy workmates with perfume, heels, and fuck-ups.
A penny saved is a woman fired.
Most importantly, the Man Billboard is an erection for you: the loyal readers of MenAreBetterThanWomen.com
Feast your eyes on the majesty — the harmony of art and logic what comprise a ‘fuck You’ to 51% of Earth. Then feast your eyes on the donation meter because only you can make it happen.
When I first envisioned the Man Billboard more than a year ago, they told me it was impossible. I’m not talking about women here. Of course women told me it was impossible. Women think losing twenty pounds or getting married after 30 is impossible. Here’s a marriage tip for women over 30: shut the fuck up and quit chopping your hair off at the shoulder. That looks old. Women probably don’t even understand that billboards can be purchased at all. As usual, women prefer an imaginary world. In this case, one where billboards grow naturally and are aware of upcoming movies.
Advertising companies told me it was impossible. And as business usually does, it makes sense. By accepting my money, any advertising company would be subject to a rain of Molotov Tampons or other silly female retaliations — perhaps a barrage of burning paternity suits for children the advertising company didn’t father. If “not my sperm” doesn’t hold up in court anymore, why should “companies don’t have sperm”?
But thanks to me, that’s all changed.
By leveraging the mighty marketing arm of Simon & Schuster — who are owned by CBS, the channel that airs Dr. Phil — I have been given the rare opportunity to erect manliness in a major metropolitan area. All that’s needed is your help.
The goal is $6,000. I will explain why below.
$5,000 - $10,000
If donations total in this range, the Man Billboard will be erected high above the streets of a major metropolitan area for one month. Whenever I think of it, I like to imagine such a manly gesture flying high above the picket line at an abortion clinic. The symbolism is clear. Women can hold signs, but manliness will always fly high in the sky without effort, keeping an eye on everything and consoling women who are making the right decision.
$11,000 - $25,000
This will erect the Man Billboard in a high demand area and/or within sight of a freeway for one month. Think of someplace that typically has a 60-foot tall man in his underwear. Now think of getting some real manliness in that place. Men are better than women.
$25,000+
Time square, the Sunset Strip, just like when having a son, the sky is the limit with this kind of cash.
Manclusion
We’ve all had a good bit of fun over the years here at MenAreBetterThanWomen.com, but now it’s time to take that fun to the world. Give a dollar, give ten, take a collection hat around your office or army base, do whatever you can to fly manliness high and proud.
Kate - $40
jeff - $60
Omny Devi - $300
wolfe - $100
Biff - $50
buster - $100
Robert - $35
Omny Devi - $150
TruthSayer - $50
Rich - $20
Luke - $50
Pedro - $100
Michael - $10
Michael - $20
Guy - $15
Mert - $20
Julius Stronghold - $26
Bryan - $15
James - $25
Regretful Morning - $5
Are Sagebakken - $50
Andrew - $10
jose - $1
Björn - $2
Alex - $1.50
Ryan - $5
Bryan - $10
Sam - $10
bola - $10
Courtney - $1
Anonymous - $1473
Bryan - $10
Mike - $4
Eric - $20
Grewal - $1
March 20th, 2008 at 9:15 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Right on the money, Keb.
March 20th, 2008 at 9:16 am - IP Man-Hash: fb7b135d29be5
Feel free to make fun of my name–actually, I think its a good idea. Im trying to figure out why Americans, although (I guess) scoring poorly on standradized tests compared to similar individuals in other countries, are more creative. I think in part is b/c we have opportunities–like this site—to be creative. This site for men is similar to being in the playground and voicing creative one-upmanship of other guys: back in my day we called it “Casing”. The top “caser” was the winner: the alpha male, if you will. Therefore, I encourage you to make fun of my name and anything else you deem fit. I actually seen the clarity of your writing improve in the month Ive been on this site, so Kudos to you. Happy insulting.
March 20th, 2008 at 9:21 am - IP Man-Hash: fb7b135d29be5
Wishing women would die, which Doubt has stated in numerous posts, (which is something I have never said) doesn’t seem to be refective of a true love and respect for women. Its more reminiscent of hatred. Then I hear you say that he doesn’t hate women, and there are a few good ones out there. He’s changing his tune; maybe the latter is what he says in church, and the former is what he says in school. Thats very unmanly.
Happy Thursday to you to as well.
March 20th, 2008 at 9:25 am - IP Man-Hash: fb7b135d29be5
I feel that women being forced to wearing a Burkha is not characteristic of a society where women are valued as much as men. But thanks for the challenge, and I intend to read up on this. For example. Can Islamic women vote? Are there more virulent forms of islam? there seem to be, the Taliban, who would not allow women to be educated.
March 20th, 2008 at 9:28 am - IP Man-Hash: fb7b135d29be5
Im not making fun of his name. “Master Dick” is a slight change of the name to show respect. Hes got quite the entrepreneural spirit. In this way, he is a great success of the american system of education.
March 20th, 2008 at 9:30 am - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
Shun shun shun, ostracize ostracize ostracize, etc.
March 20th, 2008 at 9:32 am - IP Man-Hash: 4aad97af48ec6
If Doubt has said he wishes women would die, then I’m assuming he is just venting out his frustrations here on MABTW…….kind of what this website is for. =)
March 20th, 2008 at 10:02 am - IP Man-Hash: d653cff06dec4
Manhole what’s it like to be a pencil neck parasite who is powerless as passionless and can’t find his way unless he has threat of gay rape to guide him? Do all bisexuals only follow the law from fear of brutal sexual domination? I guess that’s the only reason left since you are about as close to grasping truth and justice in your empty skull as the female.
Why would I go to Arabia and bow to a God that falls asleep on the job? This pathetic republic with all it’s wealth, might, and potential will be reformed into an Empire built on glory, justice, and power. The capitol will be bulldozed and the new seat of power will be a black as the void between galaxies phallic symbol that goes so far into the clouds the fates will weep in envy. But don’t worry.. AI will likely not even be able to navigate a staircase without falling on its head so we’ll utilize traitors like you as slave labor. You and your harlot friends(the ones who haven’t been cruficied down the busiest routes of commerce as examples) can build mock senates and committees in your slave quarters and pretend you’re still in the braindead age when the strong were tyrannized by the weak.
Mudvayne - Dull Boy
March 20th, 2008 at 10:15 am - IP Man-Hash: a5f3a30b88dc6
I dont need the threat of gay rape to guide me to do right. Although I am agnostic, I try live by the golden rule and try to give as much love around me as I can–until I feel Ive been stepped on, and then some sharp words I feel are needed for the greater good.
I think I’m going to start nick-naming you The Prince of Darkness (TPOD), or Darth Vader. Really, that 2nd paragraph was delightful. I think it belongs published somewhere—seriously. Some kind of academic journal of fiction? I’m not sure. Your a sociopath, but a dreamer as well. Wow. I think you deserve a hottie if you can behave yourself.
March 20th, 2008 at 11:37 am - IP Man-Hash: d653cff06dec4
I’ve had her already you opinionated pleb.
Unfortunately unlike that galaxy.. in this one Anakin doesn’t even betray his loyal and devoted wife for power. She betrays him for karmic nothings and secular lies and he has nothing left but the darkside.
March 20th, 2008 at 7:01 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2a918187fb9da
ey I don’t wanna be negative…but I hope ya know that once that thing’s up, a gang of fat n’ fugly bitches are gonna get their granny panties in a bunch and make you tear that shit down
March 21st, 2008 at 7:23 am - IP Man-Hash: d653cff06dec4
I’ll hang their corpses from it.
March 21st, 2008 at 7:54 am - IP Man-Hash: 4aad97af48ec6
Ewwwww! And good mornin to ya son of the suns. =)
March 21st, 2008 at 8:50 am - IP Man-Hash: 9cfdf00b83713
Jesus condemned people who thikn like you. You are very confused. Jesus loved all people. When approaching a crowd about to stone a prostitute he said “he who has not sinned throw the first stone.” He was trying to tell us something. Don’t judge people, because you yourself are not perfect and are not in a position to judge. He also said to treat all others the way you would like to be treated. Do you want to be treated the way you treat women? No, you don’t. Jesus warned you and you didn’t listen. I, a woman, judge people soley on the content of their character, and even then, i try to help them change instead of needlessly insulting them. But you hate women and only respect them if they submit to your will. However, you are not god, and no one is obligated to submit to you. Your hatred of women is just another symptom of the evil found throughout Islam. You see i have studied it, i know all about it. The muslims who truly believe these things have been tricked by satan to hate other people, destroying gods world. Jesus wanted all people to love and accept one another. If you really want to know the truth about it go to faithfreedom.org
Also, do you know who lilith is? Probably not because the bible has been edited. She was adams first wife, kicked out of the garden by adam for not submitting to adams will. She wanted to be on top during sex and she had her own ideas. Then god made eve at adams request. The subservient woman of which you speak. Eve then sinned against god because she is mentally deficient. Apparently adam made a mistake in letting his ego (the evil part of him) decide that Lilith was too independent for him. He chose a subservient woman who would go on to ruin their eden. That was the consequence for him and there will be a consequence for you. However Lilith did not disappear. She is making a comeback. She will lead us to peace and harmony, and she will hold hands with the adam who has realized his mistake. Maybe you should look into that. Read about it for yourself. The truth might sting but that doesnt mean you should ignore it. I think that you are perfectly capable of being a great person. You just need to stop letting anger and hate control you.
Peace & Love
Sarah
March 21st, 2008 at 10:05 am - IP Man-Hash: 4aad97af48ec6
@Sarah-You have no right to judge Doubt either.
I’m going to have to call my brother about this Lilith you speak of. He is senior pastor at his church…..I’ll have to get back to you on this one.
March 21st, 2008 at 10:48 am - IP Man-Hash: d653cff06dec4
The castration and feminization of the myth, lore, faith of the people and culture: the beginning of the end for the West just like the Romans.
The Bible is more than clear on the nature of women.
Keep your herpes infected hand away from Doubt.
March 21st, 2008 at 11:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 822c948329db7
“pwease Doubt. pwease be my friend, I stand up for you to the lady bullies”
March 21st, 2008 at 11:48 am - IP Man-Hash: d653cff06dec4
You’re very confident behind a monitor.. I think you’ll make a good cam whore after your institutionalized education fails you and your boyfriend realizes what a joke you are.
March 21st, 2008 at 12:01 pm - IP Man-Hash: 822c948329db7
If you picked any one of my friends and asked them to identify which speaker on this site was me they would have no problem. Bullshitters are generally pretty easy to spot.
Why would my education fail me? It wouldn’t. You have realized my education is important to me and are trying your very hardest to install some sort of fear or worry into me by targeting what I find important, and yet failing. This is also why you mention my boyfriend.
I think I have been dating my boyfriend long enough for him to know exactly who I am, but I shall be sure to tell him that some weird American guy with mommy issues, whose mom is a joke and girl friends were all jokes, and has trouble identifying who in the world actually is his mommy, and who were his girlfriends, warns him that I am a joke.
He will reply “I though Norman Bates was a fictional character?”
To which I will reply “Yes. So did I.”
March 21st, 2008 at 12:20 pm - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28
The poor little slut, she’s too dumb to make her own website and write her own book, so she’s reduced to taking potshots at our cause. I’m sure she has her own little justification, just like a terrorist has her own justification for killing innocent civilians to make a point.
The problem is, we know it will be shit that only makes sense in her ’superior mind’ which allows her to be a faggot and yet criticize our heterosexuality.