As a man, I like to start things off right and in a hurry. That means three things:

1. Make things manlier — which I’ve done by challenging you all to my 2008 Man Challenge. I’ve already completed four out of five. Better dust your balls off and get to work.
2. Watch out for any bullshit on the horizon.
3. Take it easy.

God didn’t create the universe in six days and then take it easy on the seventh. He did it in two and then took a permanent vacation. Mondays He left for men to get to work and start building civilization. Monday is the manliest day there is. That’s why women hate them.

The following are promotional posters I created to keep an eye on the biggest storm of bullshit on the horizon since the ending scene of Terminator: Hillary Clinton running for president.

At the beginning of a new year, most people waste their time reflecting on the year past, compiling useless lists like “the top ten greatest catch phrases of 2007”, and “which young starlet had the most disappointing amateur porn of herself “unwantedly” posted to the internet in 2007″.

The greatest catch phrase of 2007 was “hit the treadmill” by myself, Dick Masterson, and I have never been more disappointed to see a pair of tits than I was with Vanessa Hudgens. Is she even legal? Reflection over. Now, it’s time for some manflection.

Men look forward, we don’t look back. We look upward, never downward. And if there’s a little girl running around, we look at our flies to make sure they’re closed. There’s no sense in traumatizing little girls with the unfathomable. In that spirit, I present the first annual 2008 Dick Masterson Man Challenge. [Read more]