TMZ Agrees With Me. Why Don’t You?

If you thought about that question, you’re a woman. Fuck off my website.

Below is a short segment of the television show TMZ covering my appearance on Dr. Phil. Yes, TMZ calls me a “douche”. Yes, TMZ calls me an “actor”. But watch this clip “between the lines” and you’ll discover something mancredible.

TMZ agrees with me.

It would be impossible for a news agency based in the den of prostitution, failure, and fashionable eating disorders that is Women in Hollywood, to disagree with me. Just look at a picture of Harrison Ford smiling like a choir boy and then a picture of Amy Winehouse looking like a doped-out mule. You’ll agree with me too.

Men are better than women at Hollywood.

The men of Hollywood are the pinnacle of class and sophistication. They represent the purest qualities of manliness and that’s why they’re famous. Just look at Cary Grant or James Bond or WC Fields. Fuck, look at Robert Downey Jr. That guy is a drugged out mess, but Iron Man was so awesome I didn’t even care that no chicks got naked in it.

Women have ruined free tits in action movies. So much so that I don’t even expect them anymore — like I did in the time of Demotion Man and Terminator. Thank God for ubiquitous internet porn. Otherwise 13 year old boys wouldn’t know what a tit looked like until they shackled a wedding ring around their ankle and tossed a fat bitch across the threshold.

The women of Hollywood are the purest whores on Earth. That’s why they’re famous. Money grubbing and dumb as the day is long. The quickest way for a woman to gain fame and respect from other women is to be a whore. Men aren’t buying Paris Hilton’s album. Women are. For every Nicolas Cage, there’s a Heather Mills. For every Alec Baldwin, there’s a woman who wouldn’t suck ten cocks to give Justin Timberlake a sponge bath.

That means there’s only one woman who wouldn’t do that.

Men are better than women at Hollywood, but men are not better than women at eating Hollywood shit. Welcome to celebrity gossip.

Check your internet browser history after your wife has been alone in the house for 3 hours. This is what it will look like:

10:05 PerezHilton.com
10:15 TMZ.com
10:32 Zappos.com
10:40 TMZ.com
10:41 TheSuperficial.com
10:45 PerezHilton.com
10:46 TMZ.com
10:46 Ringtones.com
10:47 PerezHilton.com
10:48 TMZ.com
10:49 PerezHilton.com
10:49 TheSuperficial.com
10:50 ObviousSpyWare.net
10:55 gawker.com
10:56 TMZ.com
10:56 MenAreBetterThenWomen.com
1:05 MenAreBetterThanWomen.com

Women suck down celebrity gossip like a bum with a 50oz. bottle of Thunderbird Ltd. The only difference is, women shed money for it like bums shed stink. Ask yourself one question, if TMZ agreed with me 100%, what could they say? How could they not piss off their target audience while simultaneously telling fat cunts across the board to hit the treadmill.

Answer: They would compare me to Charlie Sheen.

Charlie Sheen is the Santa Claus of pussy. He bleeds awesome because he has three balls and nothing can stop him because technically he doesn’t exist. He’s actually a manifestation of macho. Like how Kobe Bryant’s rape charge was a manifestation of one blond whore wanting attention? Charlie Sheen exists only as a fabricated manifestation of manliness. He is will incarnate and women line up to fuck him.

Aside from Maddox not asking me what Man Points are because he knew instinctively that asking questions about Man Points is a loss of Man Points, being compared to Charlie Sheen by the world’s biggest celebrity news agency is the highest compliment I’ve ever received.

Prostitution and alimony are the same things. Both are paying the whore the leave. All women are whores and if you don’t think that’s true, find me one woman who hasn’t fucked a guy for money, fame, or attention — or because he bought her something nice on Valentine’s Day.

Attention ladies, fucking a guy because he paid attention to you makes you a whore. Time is money. If you could keep a roof over your heads without getting on your backs, you’d know that.

Manclusion

You’re a douche, I’m a douche, everyone’s a big fucking douche. I see what you’re saying TMZ people, and I’ve been saying it for years. Men are better than women at knowing when we’re getting served a shit sandwich and told it’s chivalry.

Women are as subtle as a tank. When you’re speaking in subtleties to women, you might as well be talking about the stock market. They don’t get that either.

Special thanks to montreal for making this post possible.