The Proof is in the Penguins
Once upon a time there was a shitload of penguins that lived in Antarctica. One day every year all the penguins would get together and have sex with each other. Eggs would be born and everyone knows what happens next.
The women assume that they are done, fuck off completely, go and eat to their hearts’ content while their mate starves, and don’t come back until they are so bloated on fish carcass they can barely walk. Needless to say, their demeanors have not improved.
Sound familiar?
I read something in a man-book of science and knowledge that said all the organisms on Earth have a great deal of similarity genetically speaking — some impressive percentage that I don’t remember. When it comes to the DNA, we’re all pretty much the same animal. Is it any surprise then that we can find examples of women and their awfulness up and down the food chain?
I’m talking about March of the Penguins here, which is a good movie if you like to watch men suffering for goldbricking harlots and matriarchal moochers. That’s a trick question of course. You can watch a movie without seeing men suffer for goldbricking women just as easily as you can live it — which is not easily. The only way to escape women, their selfish henpecking, and the wake of its destruction; is probably to be in prison. Believe me, I’ve considered it.
Penguins can probably teach us a lot of things about surviving in the cold and catching fish, but they can also teach us the much more important lesson of men being better than women. In the movie about the breeding habits of emperor penguins, the females are completely fucking useless. They only go like a month without food while the males go four; they are conveniently gone during the month-long portion of the mating season that involves wedging an egg the size of a softball in your ass and balancing on your goofy looking feet against two-million mile an hour winds; and they are constantly making noise. It’s very annoying after a while.
The only thing the penguin women do right (and this is purely on accident) is square off with one another during the mating dance. I don’t know how much man has genetically in common with his penguin predecessors, but I don’t think you can have a penis and not enjoy a good cat fight.
The women penguins also can’t protect their baby penguins for shit. When they come back from their feast, sliding on their distended, fish-packed, bellies, and the males limp toward the sea at one third the healthy penguin weight, some of the first shots we see are birds just swooping down casually and picking the babies off like bread crumbs. Frankly, it made me sick, and I don’t know how you can watch that scene and not think of every single child who’s ever been abducted in a playground with a yappy, irresponsible mother yapping away incessantly less than twenty feet away.
That’s another thing. Women are responsible for most child abductions, and guess what we see in March of the Penguins. That’s right, when one of the new mothers, fat on fish jelly, accidentally drops her baby onto the freezing tundra, her first move is to snipe the baby of another. Real classy ladies. Real classy.
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Chris=Mr. Empty-pants: http://www.maleenhancement.org/
So you’re comaring yourself to… a penguin. Sweet ass.
BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! This is definitely one of your most entertaining articles! I didn’t know that about penquins! Hysterical!
You’re such a dumb coward cunt it’s unbelievable
Dick’s IP man Hash is IP Man-Hash: 8c78dc5304b3b
You should have fucked off this website when you had the chance, bitch.
Menarebetterthanwomen,
wow someone has a little bit of a crush on dick,always defending him knowing his IP off by heart.
Its touching chris
really
Интересно, хотя не мешало бы чуть подетальней написать, а то есть несколько непонятных моментов :)
Dick whether you ‘hate’ women, or love them it is clear you are obsessed and fascinated by them.
And this obsession clearly shows that a woman has done something to traumatize you and put you off women for life.
How do you know that he MUST have had girlfriends who treated him badly?????
Are you saying ALL women are HURTFUL?? And it MUST be traumatic spend time with women??
http://exposingfeminism.wordpress.com/shaming-tactics/
That’s why we just fuck you and chuck you.
Because you’re fucking trauma case.
But It’s ok sweety…. we don’t have to LIKE the women we fuck.
If men waited around for women we actually LIKED,
Worthlessm uselss cunts like YOU would never get laid.
You’re welcome.
Firstly: Get your grammar right.
Secondly: I wouldn’t want to get laid by a a man like you, i’d just wait for a decent ‘real man’ to come along.
Thirdly: It says ‘A woman’, not all women treat men badly, a lot of men treat women far worse.
English isn’t even my first language.
When you are as eloquent in German and French as I am in English, THEN you can comment on my grammar.
And stop whining when men treat you (or other women) badly ….
Just listen to yourself and observe how you behave toward a man you NEVER MET who NEVER TREATED YOU BADLY…. just because he typed something you didn’t like.
You fucking worthless whining cunt.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Chris, where are you from? Kommen Sie aus Deutschland?
Chris, stop whining when women treat you badly, just listen to yourself and observe how you behave towards a woman you’ve never met before, just because she typed something you didn’t like.
I am a Man. I am from Mars.
Haven’t you heard?
But Mars is better than Venus. If you spend too much time on Venus your face will melt off.
I am not REQUIRED to respect you.
You keep making that mistake.
I AM NOT LIKE YOU. I DONT EXPECT YOU TO TREAT ME WELL FOR NO REASON. YOU ARROGANT CUNT.
You’re the one who spraying your whining stinky pussy all over this website.
Go get fucked.
I’m hardxcore because I called her a cunt!
I’m so good at being scene.x)
Women should be obscene and not heard.
chris you constantly attack women who dont use proper grammar so dont curl up in a little ball and use the ‘its not my first laguage’ excuse, untill you can use english to its full and proper extent dont go around being a hypocrite.
I’m very scene and hardxcore calling people cunts.I can’t go to concerts like the really awesome scene kids do every night.My mom want let me that cunt!!
Damn I’m a hardxcore bitch.xrawrx
ok, Im not sticking up for chris at all but I have to tell you, you sound like an idoit. there are plenty of other more obvious ways to insult chris then calling him a scene kid, no one cares what that is and Im sure it doesnt offend him
so wise up, stop being a child.
The thing that separates humanity form other creatures is the ability to rise above our basal nature and become something better than the simple sum or our genes.
How come I missed this one? This is excellent.
A long time ago, before I would have been old enough to be able to recall the happening now, my mom and me went to the marketplace.
I’ve been told I managed to walk off on my mother while she was inspecting produce or smth. and went to this chubby gipsy lady who so happened to be selling.
Since all women are suckers for a baby face she was kind enough to give me this fistful wrapped in newspaper. I was happily chomping away at the seeds whole by the time my mom realised I’d gone and flipped out hysterical like.
Thank God the affable woman realised who she was and motioned to her before she had a seizure or smth.
- BENNY BENASSI – Hypnotica + Remixes (2003)\BENNY BENASSI-Dont Touch Too Much
You wouldn’t need to place a woman Dick, it’s automatic. Can’t really say much about this article except its another good one.
Dick this is one of my favourite posts so far. Goldness.
- Far East patriarch
Thanks, Ben. Let me assure you that Female has not been placed here nor is she welcome.
If I were to have planted a woman on this site, she would be a hell of a lot more believable than Female.
-Dick
This is so not you if you were I would know because I’m hardxcore.
You stupid cuntx trying to be Dick!
I’m scene and I will flail my arms at you!
Dumb josh bitch. Why don’t you realize your IP addr is tagged.
quick chris, nows your chance tell dick all you feel!
Dick I am so scene.
I’m very hardxcore and I would love to be your personal brainwashed zombie.
I already believe everything you say just because your a man.
I’m the perfect candidate.
I’m hardxcore cunts!Kthnxbabe
Josh Bitch. Why don’t you simply fuck off.
oh yeah, you really hit home with that peice of original thinking AA
You’re a chatty little bitch, aren’t ya?
…. a chatty little bitch who’s begging for gang-anal.
I’ve got an inkling that “Female” has been placed here purposefully just to infuse a biased point of view. I mean, contributing members of society don’t talk like that. If she’s for real, it’s hilarious.
Anyway great site Dick, good reads!
http://www.cnn.com/2005/WORLD/europe/12/20/britain.penguin.ap/index.ht ml
Must’ve been after a manly mascot.
There goes property value
Praise the Lord.
Don’t feel too bad Christian, very soon I’ll be in their “homeland.” Dear god!
Isn’t it always the case ?
As soon as you get a women involved you can kiss it goodbye.
They inherently are the greatest killer of fun and joy that I can find or think of.
The cretin “female” and her pathetic part-time supporter are a very good example on how women are apt at killing anything that has meaning or thats worth discussing.
Look guys, it’s not fair that its over here in Aus.
How about passing the hat around so we could send her to the epicentre of feminist moronic thought “Denmark”. It could join the moronic femmie party ?
What do you think ? I’ll give “a” Euro towards it.
Guys, give me a break.
Well Dick, I have to tell you that I am a Correctional Officer in a prison and not only are women allowed to hold officer positions in an all male institution, but they are shocked and complain, when inmates whistle or give “cat-calls” to them. Infact here atleast woman are in charge of the Mental Health department, which has forced Officers to coddle these inmates, thus turning them into sniveling children. Proof that even in a facility of screwed up people, women can screw things up even more. Even in prison, there is no escape from the insanity of women.
“Man must be arched and buttressed from within, else the temple wavers to the dust.” – Marcus Aurelius Antoninus
Sounds like female, then again maybe not since her Prozac Nation meds have made her sterile. Not that I’m complaining though, she’s a sure candidate for eugenics :) If not, she’d goe crazy and kill her kids off like most other bitches dream of doing !
http://crime.about.com/od/female_offenders/a/mother_killers.htm
Not only did I consider prison Dick, I actually went… the best month of my life… I finally knew what it felt like to have no responsibility… like a woman.