Drunk Man Driving
Men are more responsible than women when it comes to anything. Having unprotected sex for example; have you ever heard a woman ask the following:
Are you on the pill? Why the fuck not, you’re about to have sex?
No. First of all, women don’t think like that until it’s too late. That’s why they’re so vocal about men thinking only with their penises. It merely betrays the power of their own frantic sexual desires. That’s called hysteria and for every ten knocked up women on Earth hysteria caused nine of them.
Secondly, if there was a pill for men, every man in the world would eat them like Tic Tacs — the white Tic Tacs. Why the fuck not indeed.
Men are also more responsible than women at drunk driving.
If you think drunk driving is the 8th deadly sin or that drunk drivers should be thrown into pedophile prison for life then go ahead and fuck off my site. You’re obviously a woman and you’re thinking with your stupid female brain. That’s the problem. Go watch Oprah or use some finger paints and leave the speaking and thinking to men.
See, we men know about math and numbers. That’s why we don’t say that manner of stupid shit every time we open our mouths. Speaking of facts, let’s look at them:
Mothers Against Drunk Drivers is 100% is full of bitches.
Don’t think so? Here’s a piece of MADD’s organizational goals:
A mandatory provision in every separation agreement and divorce decree that prohibits either parent from drinking and driving…with minor children in the vehicle. Violating this provision should result in penalties such as license suspension, jail, and the termination of parental rights.
In other words, if you drive after having a snifter of brandy, MADD wants to take away your fucking children.
What the fuck is the matter with women? Why is the first step always either take away the kids or cut off the penis? Dealing with women is like playing pin the tail on the donkey with a blindfolded Nazi. They’re fucking crazy and always playing stupid kids’ games that have nothing to do with life.
Here’s another fact: of all fatal car crashes in 2004, twice as many intoxicated drivers were men.
Big fucking surprise.
That’s like saying a billion times as many deaths in war were men, or six times as many jock strap related injuries in 2005 happened to men.
When the fuck do women do anything that might get them into trouble or ruin their precious images of themselves as a little white washed princesses? Never.
‘I had no idea you were drunk when I got in the car!’
Yea the fuck right. And that’s a decision women make nearly sober, so who’s the real irresponsible jackass? It’s certainly not men — and that means it’s women.
Let’s also not forget men can drink about infinity more than women while remaining better drivers. If they ever pass that law forcing drunk drivers to use red license plates, I’m going to go around bolting them onto women’s bumpers as a public fucking service.
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April 5th, 2006 at 4:00 pm - IP Man-Hash: 6c3e3a6f57642
And don’t forget the drive to the guy’s house who she is fucking whilst you are at work.
April 6th, 2006 at 8:42 am - IP Man-Hash: 5950bb08d3016
Another thing that really ticks me off is that most bitches drive HUGE SUVs and cut me off daily as I am driving to and from work where I do research all day so that we can all not die of cancer. These bitches cut me off all the time while putting on their makeup for their next fuck.
Men do drive SUVs too dont get me wrong, but ALOT of men I see driving sedans, why do women drive SUVs? It’s not like they would ever go off-road or haul anything heavy worthy of an SUV besides 20 bags from Macy’s using our credit cards.
April 8th, 2006 at 2:11 pm - IP Man-Hash: 76cebfba7c181
MADD is certainly worthy of some study. They are the old WCTU — Women’s Christian Temperance Union — reborn in atheistic secular garb. (Those ladies helped us into Prohibition. Thanks!) Women have always had the desire to control men, and demonizing alcohol is one effective approach.
-wolfe
April 8th, 2006 at 7:04 pm - IP Man-Hash: 8dd3dc862afae
I did not know that, wolfe. I read about a page of their bullshit-i-festo and decided not to wade through the MADD history of dumbness.
A temperance union. Truly an invention of womankind.
-Dick
April 10th, 2006 at 6:13 am - IP Man-Hash: eadd56da2c7c9
Temperance and dumbness always seem to go hand-in-hand. Check the hate mail page at Modern Drunkard Magazine.
-Big Al
April 10th, 2006 at 9:33 am - IP Man-Hash: f3ae1ac46a2e3
Wow. I thought I had some wackos.
-Dick
April 10th, 2006 at 11:21 pm - IP Man-Hash: 76cebfba7c181
That anti-drinking crusader almost makes some women look smart. Almost.
And again the link to the teetotaler Hitler for whom women voted.
-wolfe
April 10th, 2006 at 11:29 pm - IP Man-Hash: eadd56da2c7c9
Interesting that Candy Lightner, the founder of MADD, has left, stating that it has become far more “neo-prohobitionist” than she ever wanted.
Their use of stats is interesting too. They advertise “Drunk Drivers Kill 16,000 Americans a Year”.
To quote Modern Drunkard Magazine again:
“…they get that statistic from their longtime co-conspirator, the National Highway Traffic Safety Administration, who puts it like this: 16,000 Americans each year are killed in alcohol-related accidents. MADD consciously took the term alcohol-related and twisted it into alcohol-caused.
“What does alcohol related mean? It means someone involved in the accident had a measurable (not necessarily illegal) amount of alcohol in their system, or there was evidence of alcohol near the scene (an old beer can under the seat will do). They are not saying the someone with alcohol in their system caused the accident or was even driving or even inside a motor vehicle. But somehow it is always the drinker’s fault. Sober drivers never get into accidents, so it’s gotta be the drinker’s fault, right? Here’s some of the methods they use to arrive at and further inflate the number:
1.) A measurable amount of alcohol means anything above .00 percent, up to and including a sip of beer or cough medicine.
2.) Drivers impaired by drugs, be it aspirin, cough syrup, crack or heroin, are often counted as drunk drivers.
3.) If a pedestrian is involved and has a measurable amount of alcohol it is considered alcohol-related.
4.) If the accident is a sober driver’s fault (i.e. a sober driver runs a red light and crashes into a driver who had a beer after work) it is alcohol-related.
5.) If the residual presence of alcohol is found (an empty beer can) it is considered alcohol related, even if tests prove no one has any alcohol in their systems.
6.) The NHTSA arbitrarily adds 9% to all the alcohol-related statistics it receives from the states. Why? Because they feel like it.
7.) If a passenger has alcohol in his system, it is considered alcohol related.
8.) To further inflate the numbers, The NHTSA just started using what they call the Multiple Imputation Method to inflate alcohol-related statistics even more. The method automatically assumes that anyone involved in an accident who was not tested for BAC (probably because they were obviously sober) could actually have been drunk, and the numbers are jacked up by a set percentage.”
The astounding thing is that these methods were devised by SOBER women.
-Big Al
April 11th, 2006 at 12:19 am - IP Man-Hash: 76cebfba7c181
Great comment Al. I was unaware of Ms. Lightner’s comments.
That said, do the words “sober” and “women” really go together in any meaningful way?
-wolfe
April 11th, 2006 at 9:50 am - IP Man-Hash: f3ae1ac46a2e3
Sober women. Policemen in America have a scale for drunk drivers. It’s one lady for every drink consumed. For example:
This guy looks to be about five ladies in.
One wonders why the verbiage seems so fitting.
Great information, Big Al. I had not encountered any of it.
-Dick
April 15th, 2006 at 4:50 am - IP Man-Hash: 6976b732de182
Those MADD bitches are the worst organization EVER, and are mostly populated with bored doctor’s wives who want to feel important and have NOTHING to do all day but sit around trying to meddle in other people’s business.
MADD dumped this wrecked car on the front of my high school as some kind of touchy-feely “warning” public fucking art display. I noticed that when people drove past the school they would gawk at what looked like a fresh wreck on the sidewalk and swerve, so I told the principal that their retarded display was going to cause an accident. Of course the dumb fat bitch ignored me and said “if this wrecked car saves JUST ONE LIFE by making someone think twice about drinking and driving, I have a moral obligation to keep it up.”
Uh huh. Less than a week later some old guy plowed into a tree because he got distracted by their little art project. Anytime a group tries to justify their glurgy feminist anti-freedom agenda by saying “if it saves JUST ONE LIFE” that is the signal to blast them in the face with some kind incendiary device.
April 15th, 2006 at 11:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 9a1ed05ade124
Alarming anecdote, Countess.
-Dick
April 19th, 2006 at 11:13 pm - IP Man-Hash: 4b2724cf3f725
I’m sure i could think of some ridiculous way to “save just one life” off the top of my head and then try to force other people to do it by saying they have a moral obligation. We should take chemicals out of school chemistry labs, because i heard about a kid who stole some chemicals and ended up setting himself on fire, he didnt die, but he could have. If taking chemicals out of chemistry labs saves just one life, we have a moral obligation to do so… Gosh, i feel like a retarded stay at home mom already!!!
April 20th, 2006 at 5:36 am - IP Man-Hash: 9efaeb2a8447e
What sort of research might that be? Market researching sun-screen lotions?
August 7th, 2006 at 6:42 pm - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
A man and his car. A match made in heaven. Then women propped themselves in the mix somewhere and everything went to hell.
It’s not just men that are better than women. Cars are better than women as too. Well, at most things. Here’s a few reasons why that is.
Cars are also better at driving. Themselves and their self.
August 8th, 2006 at 6:02 am - IP Man-Hash: eadd56da2c7c9
Best attempt I’ve encountered to condense the history of the world into a single sentence.
-Big Al
August 8th, 2006 at 11:01 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
To men driving is an exquisitely pleasurable experience in itself. And we’re right. It really is. Whether it’s a tired little sedan that barely reaches 90 kmph after the better part of a minute or some spanking new spicy sports car a man will enjoy driving it, less or more.
To women, driving is just another chore that happens to be a means to a lot of very telling ends.
August 10th, 2006 at 6:52 pm - IP Man-Hash: 76cebfba7c181
Very true Sony.
-wolfe
April 22nd, 2008 at 6:42 am - IP Man-Hash: cc3d2cd4f5983
im from england and i watch women arrive in vehicles, ud use to assault cuba, and then spend a hour trying to park them, eventually giving up, and leaving there jeeps parked in the middle of the road, while they go to the cash machine,or for more cement to cover there cracks on there faces.
do us all a favour WOMEN buy a fucking bike.
April 22nd, 2008 at 10:15 am - IP Man-Hash: 4144e596343d7
Women cannot park large 4 x 4s because their low testosterone levels impair their spatial awareness.