Lesbians Are Faking It

Ask any gay person this and he’ll tell you the same thing: “lesbians” are all fucking faking it.

“Lesbianism” is like being an animal rights activist (and also being a woman). Are those Prada shoes made out of fake leather? Is that Ortho Tri Cyclen (AKA Super Whore Pills) not made of bear bile? Wasn’t Hitler a vegetarian?

If you thought about any of those questions, you just lost a hundred Man Points.

I’m not one to knock animal rights. I’m just talking about women doing it and women fucking it up. Also, animal rights is stupid.

Women at doing things are like trying to use bottle rockets to change the channel when your remote controller runs out of batteries. Can you imagine that? You tell the bottle rocket to hit the Channel Up button ten feet away, but you know exactly what it’s going to do. It’s going to go shooting off in flames wherever the fuck it thinks it wants to go at random levels of ferocity with no fucking point. That’s activist women for you: fucked. That’s also women when it comes to being gay.

Do you know how many women are not “lesbians”? The answer is: no women are not “lesbians”. Don’t bother asking them because all women lie about it unless they’re on the radio, but all women have had one or several experiences with a member of the same sex — or have had a fantasy about doing so and that makes you gay. That means all women are “lesbians” and also that no women are “lesbians”. That’s all the fucking proof in the world right there.

Another reason “lesbians” are bullshit is because women are obsessed with sex. When you get two women together in a relationship all that’s important is sex. Sex, sex, sex. What should we do tonight? How about some sex. What should we have for dinner? Well the sex sounds good. Should we go on a vacation this summer? Should sex go on a sex-cation this summer? Probably not because I don’t know what that is. The point is it’s not a relationship. It’s just a puppet show of carnality. How uncivilized.

Speaking of deciding where to go for dinner, I can’t even remember the last time I let a woman decide something in a relationship. That’s because it’s never happened. As a man, the first time you have sex is when your Man Point Man Meter starts ticking. If you let a woman make a decision before that moment (and you fucking did — you let one decide to get pregnant with you) it doesn’t count. Remember that. In a “lesbian” “relationship”, no matter how easy the question is, a woman has to answer it.

That is fucked. That’s also probably why “lesbians” are so fucking in love with mass transit systems. No relationship can be built on the decisions and thinking of women. Everyone knows that; even your government and the Bibles of all religions in history know that. Therefore I have disproved “lesbianism”.

Suck it “lesbians”.

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