Top Ten Reasons Marriage is Stupid

Posted in The MANifesto on July 21st, 2008

I would never marry a woman who hated me enough to let me go through with it.

Marriage is fucked and stupid and the second fastest way any young man can ruin his life. The first fastest way is by having a child. Try folding an index card in half twenty times. That’s how hard it is to find beer money or a blowjob in the budget once you’ve got a kid.

Here are the top ten reasons why marriage is stupid. [Read more]

Dick’s Voicemail #17

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on July 16th, 2008


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Dick’s Voicemail #16

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on July 14th, 2008

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Dick’s Voicemail #15

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on July 10th, 2008

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Dick’s Voicemail #14

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on July 7th, 2008


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Dick’s Voicemail #13

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on July 1st, 2008

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Dick’s Voicemail #12

Posted in Dick In Your Ear on June 30th, 2008

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Whore Sells House

Posted in World News on June 27th, 2008

A single mother in Florida by the name of Deven Traboscia is selling her house and herself on eBay for the low, low price of $840,000.

Did I say low price? I meant outrageous price!

In her own words, prospective buyers are paying $340,000 for her two-thousand square foot home, and $500,000 for her unknown square foot vagina — which she’s already used to pop out two kids. Doesn’t sound like a great deal to me.

I’m no state-licensed vagina appraiser, but at 42 years old, and after having served two active tours of duty as a human cloner, that pussy is going for about a million dollars a square foot. The warranty on that thing has expired. The elastic band on thrift store underpants are tighter than that turkey gobbler. The girl’s junk would make a better shammy than a sex toy.

$500,000? In the immortal words of Gerrit Graham, “That’s too fuckin high!” [Read more]