Pay, Pump, and Go.
I was pulling up to a gas pump yesterday that a woman was just leaving and when I got out of the car a shrill female voice shouted across the gas station, “What the fuck!” It was the very same woman who had just gotten back into her car and pulled away.
“Yea?” I said. She again repeated, “What the fuck!”
That’s how women solve problems. They stop whatever they’re doing and scream obscenities until someone refills their bottle. That’s also why little girls shouldn’t swear, because as they grow up, they’ll be frothing at the mouth to do so.
Obviously, the woman was upset because she was somehow not done with whatever she was doing that a man would have done in half the time.
“I thought you were done.” I said.
Another woman came out of nowhere and began comforting the first who was well in hysterics. After all, I had just robbed her of her due right to purchase gasoline exactly how and when she had envisioned doing so. Without a man’s sense of priority or perspective, this act was tantamount to me waltzing into her wedding, tipping over the cake, making gang signs in all the pictures, and then seducing her mother for the evening and not calling her the next day. Real class act basically, and all I did so far was open my car door.
The new woman instructed the other to use one of the many pumps around the other side of the petrol station.
“Hey!” I said clearly and deliberately as though I was addressing a rebellious mule. “I thought you were done.”
Like every man does in absolutely every situation, I fixed the problem immediately. I simply backed up and went to another pump. By the way, that’s a good strategy when it comes to dealing with women caught in the wild mania that they call their home — simply back up and go for another. It’s not like suffering any of her bullshit is going to win you an award or any fucking compassion. Women have the memories of goldfish.
I hesitate to make this article about how men are better than women at filling their car with gas, although it’s completely true. As I watched the completely normal — let me stress that again — completely normal woman whose make-believe logic and hysteria you encounter a hundred times every day, continue her grand gasoline purchasing adventure, I discovered two things.
Mistake number two was that she had pulled up to the pump on the wrong side, thus prompting her to back out in the first place. That explains the cursing, I thought. When women are embarrassed they will try to eviscerate everything that they can get their talons in — especially their own children.
Mistake number one was that a man gave her a set of car keys.
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December 29th, 2005 at 6:54 pm - IP Man-Hash: 7f5a0b2070dae
Strange. The feminist opinions I have read assert that the only difference between men and women (intrinsically) is in their genitalia. The differences that exist in the sexes are a product of nurture rather than nature, according to this theory.
Perhaps, the dominant feminist philosophy has changed since the last time I read one of their academic treatises, opinion columns, and essays(?)
December 29th, 2005 at 7:13 pm - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad
I don’t read feminist literature.
See
Bear in mind this is a study published 1999.
December 29th, 2005 at 7:17 pm - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad
I have tried to link some articles but I think the url function is disabled.
Get google scholar, google neurological differences men women.
Simple answer is that what we take in from the environment (nurture) depends to a large extent on our biology, as does, how we process the data we take in.
I don’t read feminist theory but it is just as relevant today as it was in the ’70s. Don’t let the men here fool you into complacency.
December 29th, 2005 at 7:34 pm - IP Man-Hash: 7f5a0b2070dae
Thanks for the help but I already knew that men and women are different. I just didn’t know that modern feminist theory accepted that.
I don’t understand how you can say something is relevant today if you’ve never read it.
December 29th, 2005 at 7:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad
I don’t know if modern feminist theory accepts it either, but I don’t see why it wouldn’t.
What I meant was that I don’t go out of my way to read feminist theory, but it does come up in what I do study and it’s necessary to cover some of it. It’s extremely relevant actually and I do plan to take a better look at it. I’m just not into gender bashing (surprise, suprise) so I have tried to steer clear of it.
I would think that it will soon become more relevant than ever, when you consider legislation in the US discriminating against gay marriages, the changing structure of the family with new reproductive technologies and of course, the whole Islam issue. Then we have the pissed off boys like Christian J and other men on this site who want to wage a cyber war against our sex. I recommend you check out Christian’s site. He has a link to it in the forums. Disturbing.
December 30th, 2005 at 6:24 pm - IP Man-Hash: 60b660aafc3e4
Female, have you ever been mistreated (in the real world) by a man because you were a woman?
December 30th, 2005 at 7:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: dc6df4d5c25ad
Of course!! I have also been treated extremely well by men. Don’t think I’m on some kind of a pity trip or am a victim. Definately not a victim and not into wallowing, lifes too short for that.
April 26th, 2006 at 3:23 am - IP Man-Hash: 8fd386ff18ad8
Good for you female!
May 21st, 2006 at 1:44 pm - IP Man-Hash: 540ddeee85d4c
…………………and who’s fault, exactly, is it that the world “suits” men more than women? surely if women were even remotely competant when it came to innovation, creativity, sheer ability and had SOME form of practical and dignified ways of actually making themselves heard…then maybe, and i stress MAYBE the world would suit you, because you would in fact…be the better sex?
May 21st, 2006 at 2:12 pm - IP Man-Hash: 19105c7fbb7a4
The world doesn’t suit any sex, it has rules of its own and humans have learned to adapt to it or die.
If we are talking about human civilisation we could say that it’s hardly a world made for man - but a man-made world, is it not?
August 4th, 2006 at 2:28 am - IP Man-Hash: beec6de33c5bb
In my MUCH younger days as a cashier at a gas station I was the beneficiary of a womans’ blundering. She used her credit card, really most likely her husbands’ credit card- oh GOD i’m a traitor ! I just realized ! Please forgive me as you read on !, at the pump to get gas. When she finished she just threw the pump handle on the ground and drove off. Normally one might be frustrated with such behavior, but not me !!!
You see this was when using credit cards at the pump was a new thing and only gas cards would work. I knew instantly what that innocent looking nozzle laying on the pavement meant to me, as you probably do. FREE GAS ! $$$$
Fortunately this was at night and a slow night at that. I filled up my vette and went home and got my camaro and 5 gas cans and filled them up. Called my Dad to come fill up his full size Ford van with the dual tanks, called my friends to come fill up. I had a fellow worker keep clicking the pump between fills to keep the purchase “active” and by the time we were done the purchase was several hundred dollars ! Gas was alot cheaper then, oh the good ol’ days !
I would say thanks to the female blunder but realistically it was a fellow man who paid.
I hang my head in shame and please accept my confession !
September 2nd, 2006 at 9:58 pm - IP Man-Hash: 0a25aba878123
I just fucking love how women flock to other women and band together against the big mean angry men. God help the woman who’s spot you “stole”. May she never encounter and actually situation of emergency.
September 3rd, 2006 at 7:45 am - IP Man-Hash: 8992424e7bd95
So female admits that she and all other women are handicapped in this man made world. They can’t create anything so they cry until the big bad men changes things to accommodate them too. The reality is that men always think of the women too because women can’t do for themselves. Then she makes excuses for why women appear to be too stupid to do things for themsleves.
Yes women have the memory of a goldfish but she will bitch about something for hours and keep repeating the offense so she wont forget it until she gets home and e-mails her complaint to NOW.
September 10th, 2006 at 7:15 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1a4ed84419c7b
man I thought this was about hookers.
shit.
September 10th, 2006 at 8:07 pm - IP Man-Hash: da3164911f9b3
Gas pumps and women? Not much difference except they both pump for cash. Similar intelligence but one does a real job without complaining and the other complains without much work. Just pump, pay and go.
June 6th, 2007 at 10:30 am - IP Man-Hash: 83b7e402ade4c
Bring on the disposable android sex bots!
June 13th, 2007 at 10:37 pm - IP Man-Hash: 926a1904cecf2
Don’t bother, some girl will fuck it up by making it vegan somehow.
June 13th, 2007 at 10:39 pm - IP Man-Hash: 926a1904cecf2
Don’t bother, some girl will fuck it up by making it vegan somehow.
What am I saying? We’ll just fix it, like every other damn thing women ruin.
July 7th, 2007 at 8:50 pm - IP Man-Hash: 7e938729b7675
I clicked on this entry at the Random Dick area. I expected it to be about prostitution, with a witty title. Good article.
Prostitution doesn’t really exist. Men don’t pay women to have sex with them; they pay them to shut up and go away afterward.
July 28th, 2007 at 10:08 am - IP Man-Hash: 897b290c9c693
I just want sex women are so boring and irrelevant I could cry like one.
- make up
- relationships
- lets talk about love and clothing
- psychology
- things that don’t involve math
- women are so boring
positive:
- they have tits and vaginas
- tits and vaginas are the least boring thing on the planet