Size Matters
Which of these assholes would you hire to run your company?
I’m going to explain why you chose the one you did because I like explaining obvious shit in a humorous way. That’s why I wrote Men Are Better Than Women — on sale now.
What could be more obvious than men are better than women? Look at the size of our fucking heads!
Now, I’m going to mix up the players and make the question a bit trickier. Which one of the following candidates would you hire to do your taxes, teach your kids, replace your pancreas, engineer your bridge, or do just about any goddamn thing mankind has done since the beginning of time except pop out a clone or suck your cock?
You would choose the man because he’s got experience.
All things being equal, a bigger brain is going to produce better results. Even children know that. In fact, it takes nearly two decades to beat it out of them. That process starts with Sesame Street telling boys it’s okay to play with dolls and ends with an MBA.
By the way, let’s talk about boys and dolls. Have you ever heard one of those horseshit feminist studies where boys sometimes choose dolls over trucks when presented with no coercion or incentive to do otherwise? Thus proving that boys and girls are the same when society doesn’t shove them into little Davy Jones hats and Betty Crocker ovens?
What they don’t tell you about those studies is that the boys picked up the Barbie dolls and used them as swords. You can’t sword fight with a Tonka truck and feminists don’t know how to stock a playroom for boys.
Men, being larger than women, have brains that are approximately 10-17% larger than those of women. Men’s brains are also 100% less full of shit.
Human beings use 100% of our brains. Forget anything that your high school English teacher told you about the bio-mechanics of your head. We do not use 10% of our brains and I don’t want an overpaid babysitter talking about advanced neuroscience. Stick to what you know: babysitting.
If it was true that humans used only 10% of our brains, our heads would be the size of racquetballs and 90% of our brain would have fallen off with our gills, tail, and inability to pretend we give a shit about the women we’re talking to. Evolution is why men can pretend to care.
The point is, man-brains are bigger, and they’re bigger for a reason. Men need more brains to move our more muscles around. We also need the parts of the brain that tell us not to cry at work or stay married to a guy who fucked our sister because “it was dark and she was in our bed.” Dark? It’s called Date Rape. Men need bigger brains because if we didn’t have them, math and physics would have nowhere to live.
“In women, verbal intelligence was clearly correlated with brain size, accounting for 36 percent of the verbal IQ score,” says a study done by McMaster University researchers. “Spatial intelligence was also correlated with brain size in women, but less strongly.”
If women can’t talk about something, they can’t understand it. That’s why they fucking suck at math and listening. You can’t listen better by talking.
“In men, spatial ability was not related to overall brain size. These results suggest that women may use verbal strategies in spatial thinking, but that in men, verbal and spatial thinking are more distinct.”
And by “are more distinct”, I’m sure the researchers meant “exist”.
Women and their shit-brains have evolved to do nothing more than talk, and apparently their ability to do so is entirely dependent on the size of their heads. Men, on the other hand, are created equal — no matter how big our brains are.
“In a further sex difference, brain size decreased with age in men over the age span of 25 to 80 years, but age hardly affected brain size in women.”
The greatest man minds in history have done their greatest work at an early age for one reason: man brains fall apart under the stress of greatness. Man brains are like super charged dragsters pointed out across an oblivion of asphalt that leads to a cure for cancer, clean renewable energy, and a pile of cash bigger than Everest. We can go for it as fast as we want, but one thing’s certain: those tires aren’t going to last forever.
Women, however, can accomplish nothing just as well at 80 as they did at 30. Except at 80, no one wants to fuck them badly enough to tell them they’re smart.
A thousand studies have been done attempting to correlate cross-gender intelligence to brain size, brain density, the ratio of brain mass to body muscle mass (keep in mind that women are way fatter than men), the ratio of brain mass to height, and the density of neurons and neural pathways; but somehow, the only thing these studies have concluded is that while men have larger and better brains than women, we’re all supposed to believe that women have miraculously cobbled together perfectly respectable thinking machines out of an ability to constantly run their mouths and an emotional cortex that looks like broken sewage pipe on full blast — in spite of the fact that women have never invented shit and never seem to know a goddamn thing about science, politics, or anything that isn’t featured heavily on PerezHilton.com.
Maybe that’s true. Or maybe one time the president of Harvard got fucking fired for suggesting men were slightly better than women at math and now everyone is scared shitless. When women enter academia, the knot in their panties becomes a knot in the hose of scientific progress.
The only brain study I care about was done by Dmitri Belyaev in 1959. In it, Dmitri concluded that the domestication of animals decreases their brain size as it weeds out aggression, independence, and intelligence, and promotes tendencies toward socialization. Thanks to Dmitri, we know why women have smaller brains. They were domesticated by men.
Dmitri’s Research
Study by McMaster University
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May 5th, 2008 at 2:12 pm - IP Man-Hash: a28a8fa6fa63a
Oh, I almost forgot. For your incredible arrogance and chronic lying, after your dead from repeated simian stomping at the city zoo, I hope the orangtangs not only deficate, but pee on you. This would be fitting tribute to you, as you seem to idolize Hitler and it’s theorized he loved it when Eva Braun peed on him.
Tsk, tsk… now is that a way for the compassionate gender to talk? Girl, remember you are speaking to your betters. And as a lesbian, you’re even less than a regular woman. Even more useless. It’s a testimony to our great manly generosity that we even tolerate parasitic little slanderers like you to make use of our ingenious facilities, to which loud-mouth little cunts like you contributed very little indeed..
May 5th, 2008 at 3:11 pm - IP Man-Hash: 0a074b6031993
If I was a lesbian, I’d take a ceramic rolling pin and whack you over the head with it for being a “tsk-tsk” girly-boy who enjoys the San Francisco treat in his mouth after dinner everynight from his fair-haired brother, you moron.
May 5th, 2008 at 4:05 pm - IP Man-Hash: 532bcd01ca155
WOMANS BRAINS MUST BE IN THERE TITS.. CAUSE THAT THE ONLY THING I CAN UNDERSTAND…
May 5th, 2008 at 4:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: a74c88570a16c
shouldn’t you be doing dishes or driving a minivan?
May 5th, 2008 at 5:38 pm - IP Man-Hash: e9c63ba9a78b6
Can I interrupt his comment board with the following question:
Wtf happened to the forums? Or did Dick finally figure out how to IP filter the wimmenz and I can’t see it anymore?
May 5th, 2008 at 5:39 pm - IP Man-Hash: a32b3c3d2fc01
Wow, i can’t believe this site can be THIS stupid…
I admit, some women are well…. they fit the descriptions of some of the things said, but not every freaking woman is like this! I mean seriously, it’d be like saying every man is like Michael Jackson.
Well I just think both genders are very capable and maybe you should start looking at the ones who AREN’T complete idiots, instead of classifying the whole female race on a couple of whores…
Well whatever, this thing is still really stupid… I think both genders were put on this planet for a reason and neither could survive without the other.
Thanks, Don’t Kill Me O_O
May 5th, 2008 at 5:44 pm - IP Man-Hash: 062703d978411
This is simple; women hate that everything in their brains is specialized and hot-wired for infants and children. They reject the role that nature has specified is theirs, they think men have it better. Does this unhappiness have to do w/ the demands of the role? Yes. They would rather store their young in a deep freeze than embrace the daunting responsiblity that lies ahead. “You have a baby brain.” Literally, and as measured on the chart, over there….where it resides in a jar.
May 5th, 2008 at 5:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: a32b3c3d2fc01
Like I said before, have you looked at the billions of women on this planet who love and care for their children? They don’t reject the role that is theirs, and are not saying men have it better (at least most of them don’t) they’re just saying they don’t want to be insulted while having the hard job that nature has given them.
May 5th, 2008 at 5:53 pm - IP Man-Hash: 062703d978411
I live in an area that is staturated (bwahaa) by lesbian couples. One theme is prevalent throughout them all, and that is domination and submission. Abusesive parent/dependent child.
It’s just a twisted mutation of diaper changes. You think I’m just being a jerk? Grab your barf bag, and search these things out like I’ve had to.
May 5th, 2008 at 5:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: 062703d978411
Supporting them? Did Nature give women that job? (I’m just asking)
May 5th, 2008 at 5:56 pm - IP Man-Hash: a32b3c3d2fc01
Yup, I get what your saying. Just hear me out. Not all women are like that, and thats just basically what i want to say. Why should we classify the entire feminin race on a couple of idiots? Honestly, you can find many females that are smarter and more capable than men, as you can find vice versa. I’m just saying that theres a good and bad to everyone, and that maybe we should consider everyone before making biased opinions…
May 5th, 2008 at 7:02 pm - IP Man-Hash: a32b3c3d2fc01
Guys, I would just like to say this entire thing is stupid and should never have been brought up. Women have fought for their rights and I think they deserve them. There really is no need to go insulting other people and calling them “less” than someone else JUST because they were born into a certain gender. Do you think people have a choice as to what gender they are? Somehow I doubt it, and there are very compassionate and capable people among both genders and I feel we should hinder someone’s oppurtunities and abilities because they were born a certain way. Take a look at Stephen Hawking for example, who was born with his disease but is still a great person who really contributed to society. If you look at this with an unbiased eye, I think you might find it quite unfair for those who were born with a “shell” around them, and cannot break free of it because of those who will move to hinder their abilities.
Man that was long >.> Ok well whatever.
May 5th, 2008 at 8:22 pm - IP Man-Hash: 11c2a6593052a
Women are idiots… worse than that… they are lazy idiots… even worse than that they are morally corrupt, lazy idiots. And just cause a woman can point to the ONE time they acted like they had a brain (or a conscience) doesn’t make what I just wrote untrue. Cause chances are, they didn’t even realize what they were doing till a man pointed out they were doing whatever it was Right.
May 5th, 2008 at 8:48 pm - IP Man-Hash: a74c88570a16c
like a typical woman, you failed to do some trouble shooting. If you had, you may have noticed that the forums are still there. Amazing what typing “/forum” at the end of this url will bring up.
May 5th, 2008 at 8:48 pm - IP Man-Hash: ffc820499bead
Um, outside of creativity? WTF? Outside of creativity is only cleaning the bathroom and changing diapers and popping a frozen dinner in the microwave (both also invented by a man, like everything else you see and use during your waking hours).
Typical femi maneuver. Twist the terms of debate around to totally ignore all that men do, then claim men don’t do much of importance.
Don’t you understand this ain’t MS magazine, and here you get called when you say something stupid. Like come on a forum which plainly says its for men only.
May 5th, 2008 at 9:02 pm - IP Man-Hash: 30f283fcd2c6c
Kid. Hi. try antimisandry.com Or in the event that I mispelled it, google it instead. They do articles and stuff that would tell you what Dick’s saying sans the satirical Dave Chapelle-ish take on it. You seem nice enough but fighting for their rights? There was no fight because women have NEVER been oppressed. That’s something that was made up to deflect criticism of feminism.
May 5th, 2008 at 11:11 pm - IP Man-Hash: da5eef8ca71bd
It’s good to see the silent majority threaten the vocal minority. I enjoy seeing politicians and the populous alike become indoctrinated with this ideology. It’s not a good year to be corrupted.
May 5th, 2008 at 11:15 pm - IP Man-Hash: 4588afd868ea8
http://mwhodges.home.att.net/1895-test.htm
Take a look at this 8th Grade final exam from Kansas, c. 1895. As you can see, before feminists and females forced their giant carcasses into our (men’s) schools, tests were actual tests of knowledge.
Some highlights from the test:
“Write a composition of about 150 words and show therein that you understand the practical use of the rules of grammar.”
“Find the interest of $512.60 for 8 months and 18 days at 7 percent.”
“Name events connected with the following dates: 1607, 1620, 1800, 1849, and 1865.”
“What are the following, and give examples of each: Trigraph, subvocals, diphthong, cognate letters, linguals?”
“Name and describe the following: Monrovia, Odessa, Denver, Manitoba, Hecla, Yukon, St. Helena, Juan Fermandez, Aspinwall and Orinoco.”
This was the final test for the sons of farmers, not Harvard-bound elites. I would love to hand this test to a fem and watch her head kerplode into a spray of pink glitter and matching handbags. Dick said it best; they just redraw the line and plop down on it.
-Rawkstah
May 5th, 2008 at 11:21 pm - IP Man-Hash: da5eef8ca71bd
I would kill for that education in college. The bastardization of society.
May 6th, 2008 at 12:17 am - IP Man-Hash: e9a7aeb58b124
I have to agree, I’ve never heard of half of those things..a diphthong?
…Why do I feel like that’s going to become a name brand for thongs sooner or later? I can see it now with acronyms galore.