The Evolution of Stupid

Evolution is not a theory. Evolution is a fact.

The “theory” part in the Theory of Evolution refers only to the hypothesis of biological machinations which may or may not be the cause of evolution — ie, Natural Selection and Speciation. And the manliest of scholars have spent thousands of man-hours on exactly that question: why do we evolve?

The question scholars have spent no time on is: why didn’t women evolve? The answer is, because women are stupid and lazy.

You don’t need science to tell you that water is wet.

The female brain and the male brain are not the same organ. Your first clue that that’s true should be listening to a woman speak. Making sense of a woman’s word-vomit is like trying to use a broken calculator to figure out a math problem that doesn’t make sense.

If you have some pies and half of them taste good, how many should you have sex with?

There is no calculator broken enough to solve that piece of shit.

Men’s brains evolved to be quick thinking and hilarious. I, for example, am both of those. Quick thinking and being hilarious were important qualities for primitive men to have whilst they were chasing mastodons through the primitive plains. It was important to think quickly because that meant you survived. And it was important to be hilarious because if your best friend got eaten by a land shark, sitting around crying about it like a fucking woman meant you were dessert.

Man up and crack a joke or two.

That’s been the Manual of Manliness since God built his first one out of dirt and awesome. And you just read a manual, that means you just lost 30 Man Points.

The she-brain is as different to the male brain as the she-liver or a broken tricycle. And that’s exactly why women are still dumb as monkeys. When you spend ten thousand years sitting in a cave while work is getting done outside, you don’t evolve, you just become obsessed with tidying your cave and running your goddamn mouth.

Men have evolved enormous penises. That doesn’t mean women have evolved enormous penises, does it? They haven’t even evolved enormous vaginas. The evolution of the male sex organs didn’t effect the evolution of the female sex organs. Why would the evolution of our think-organs be any different?

Read a biology text book. And if you don’t believe in evolution, read a Bible. Either one will tell you the same thing.

Men are better than women.

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