Turkey Gobblers!
Women are obsessed with plastic surgery, and one of the fastest growing surgical trends this Thanksgiving is the rejuvenating, revitalizing, reinvigorating vaginoplasty.
The rejuvenating, revitalizing, reinvigorating vaginoplasty puts the “tight” in a twat; it takes the “loose” from a labia; it crams the “new” into a snootch; and it takes at least three kids off the odometer. When marriage counseling doesn’t work, and since women are too possessive to give threesomes a shot, they’re turning to the same thing that brought us taxes, Charles Manson, and the Vagina Monologues.
The vagina.
Nothing proves that women hate sex — while simultaneously being obsessed with it — like “the vaginoplasty”. Their obsession with sexual perfection consumes them and manifests in shame, hatred, and bitterness. Women are obsessed with their vaginas like that woman in Misery was obsessed with Stephan King. If it was legal, vaginas should all get restraining orders.
Women and their vaginas remind me of a man with a classic 1958 California Spyder Ferrari, who spends all day polishing it and talking dirty to it without ever taking it out for a test drive. What a waste.
At least the Ferrari is still good to look at.
Turkey Gobblers
Since women don’t want to use their vaginas, they’re trying to turn them into something a vagina will never be: easy on the eyes. I have news for you ladies out there. You can’t turn a turkey into a swan. You can’t turn a floppy whoopie cushion into The David. You can’t turn a turkey gobbler into a 16 year old clam, no matter how much bleaching some man is paying for.
Women are disgusted by themselves and stupid. Forget about makeup and perfume, they can’t even figure out what their vaginas are for.
They’re ATM’s, not works of art.
Vaginoplasties are like Viagra for women
False. Viagra is for women. Without Viagra thousands of men would leave their old, boring wives every year for young, hot ones who could put some lead in their pencil. Then they would use that pencil to sign the divorce papers.
A vagina is a lot like a boat. You dump tons of money into it and no matter how great it sounds, it’s only fun a few times a year during the summer. Otherwise, it’s a lot of expensive upkeep.
Women all over the country are trying to put some vitality back in their vag and some “clamp” back in their clams this season with expensive and risky plastic surgery. Since I know it’s not going to work, I’ve got a procedure women should try first which is guaranteed to improve their sexual attraction:
Shut up and hit a treadmill.
Happy Thanksgiving.
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I am shutting this site down.
….no one loves you, do they?
sara: Love is one of the traps that cost men far too much. (46 been there done that bought the T-shirt)
Dick Masterson=Dildo wearing a Groucho mask! http://www.maleenhancement.org/
Chris=Mr. Empty-pants
Dick Masterson looks like Tom Cruise, is it just me but im sure Dick Masterson is Tom Cruise. looks at https://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2008/01/09/2008-01-09_will_smith_bo osting_scientology.html he has the same glasses, does any 1 have a pic where u can see Dicks eyes?
I’m sorry but almost every USEFUL discovery humanity has ever made has been made by a male. Note that i said USEFUL discovery. Make-Up and Taxes don’t fall into that category.
I still believe women are equal, i just wish they could learn to take a joke. The person who wrote this article only had good humor in mind nothing else.
Where the fuck did he say he was a defence attorney? He said he was dating one and between them, they earned a cool $600k. Learn to fucking read moron.
Seriously, cut out the insults and grow a brain.
You are a Defense Attorney on $600K and you use English “I’m was” rather than “I”? Where did you get your degree, the Lionel Hutz Community College for Zoolander School drop outs? While I wouldn’t want you defending me, I will allow you to repair my shoes.
. . . and no. I’m was never dumb enough to get married.
Tragic sweety. Every word I typed was the truth and you wish YOU could say the same. Happy New Year, dumbass.
Im 40. I’m 6′2, 215 , I look like Tom Cruise (yes, really), have all my hair and I’m fucking a 32 year-old extremely attractive Defense Attorney. Between the two of us, we make $600,000 a year (so not freakin’ idiots) and even SHE has the brains to MAKE SURE I tell her to “SHUT THE FUCK UP” on my dick when she’s being annoying.
. . . she wouldn’t have it another way, either.
Maybe YOUR life won’t work out,
and you are beginning to know it already,
but mine is right fucking spectacular, thanks.
Now get lost.
Aim higher.
And stop making pathetic excuses for yourself.
…you’ve completely missed her point here.
Not surprising.
Clever.
If I am so pathetic then why read my posts.
Simply disregard my posts, then my ideas won’t annoy you.
That is a simple solution, try to use it, it will benefit me too.
So to do us both a favor, don’t respond and this debate will end, and I will “shut-up”, because that’s the goal isn’t it?
Practice what you preach, dipshit. I don’t stroll into someone’s house, kick their dog, then get pissed when I get my ass handed to me. You came here, toots. Know your roll. Your time spent online should involve looking for recipes.
Not quite true, if none of us read your post, we’re in an ill-qualified place to tell you how utterly stupid your ideas are.
Shut up Hillbilly
Fantastic.
Now, can I make fatcs you then if we are making assumptions and since I disagree with you? You are bald, overweight, and the only love you have is the 40 year old woman on eHarmony with 50 cats and who’s been divorced three times.
You know what I realize? Life isn’t Disney movies. Everything doesn’t work out in the end and I have prepared myself for life, just as many people have. Who knows, maybe in 25 years I’ll be the woman on eHarmony, but that’s life.
I’ve come to realize it’s not how I wish it were, such as being rich and famous, rather I have a pleasant life and am happy with it, I don’t need to devote a website to realizing how self-absorbed I am and make assumptions of an entire gender. Perhaps consider there are women equal to you, and go out and see not every woman is the one’s that you have experienced.
R.O.T.F.B.M.H.A.T.W.L.M.F.A.O!!!!!!!!!!
I just blew coffee out of my nose.
Link of the MILLENIUM!
Cheers!
Check out this funny animation called ” How woman treat men”, its so true
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-QQJrIZaLsA
I’ve got a better one for ya. . . .
Who are YOU to think that what you “SAY” is to be taken at face value???
How many times have you openly declared that you really want to meet an HONEST man(?) . . . who is 6′ TALL, SMART, DRIVEN, FUNNY, EDUCATED, EMPLOYED, HAS NICE ARMS, CAN CARRY A CONVERSATION and all that other horseshit you CLAIM is exactly what you are looking for.
You’ve got it all in your head already. Rehearsed and calculated. Exactly WHO he’s ’supposed’ to be , before you even MET the guy. You KNOW it’s “the truth”, and you are “NOT lying” about it. You even managed to convince yourself to believe 100% that if you met him, you would know it in a flash and the rest would be bliss-tory.
And then . . . .
A man like that could be standing RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU, looking you straight in the eye . . . . and guess what . . .
UNLESS –>> He doesn’t tell you EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR – EXACTLY WHEN YOU WANT TO HEAR IT . . . . you are gonna go through hell and high water to attempt to “disqualify” him as “not good enough for you.”
And if he DOES . . . you are suddenly standing in your own little puddle.
HOW FUCKED UP IS THAT.
Who are we to judge you????
We are MEN . . . who know this as FACT.
We don’t even need to know ANYTHING ABOUT YOU (as an individual) to know this to be a universal truth about women –>> NEVER – EVER – pay attention to what a woman ’says’ she wants.
EVER.
Because even if you make every effort to ‘make her happy’, and conform to every last specification she broadcast as the man with EVERYTHING . . . the deal breaker WILL ALWAYS BE –>> Did he tell her what she wants to hear . . . or did he NOT.
You know it.
And I know it.
That is ONE, SICK FUCKING TRUTH about you.
And noone ‘JUDGED you’. It’s just a FACT.
So you can quit whining like you were “JUDGED”, when every “truth” you utter is merely “TRANSPARENT”.
I’m not denying that. I know that. And thats what Im saying. So if we are all born the same, then that means we should all be entitled and given the same rights and so forth and its what we choose to do with them as individuals that ultimately should determine our life. Sadly it doesn’t. That’s what I’m trying to say, and you seem like a nice normal person if thats what you believe.
I dont recall asking that, but ok. Nice to know.
If you notice, it actually wasn’t an argument, I was just answering a question.
No not really. Coz as a chick, when u see this site, u don’t get it. and all u see is anger and degradation for ur sex, so u automatically assume that people that support the site don’t like women, and if you dont like women, how could you love them? So you just assume that either they are celibate or gay. It seems logical from what angle we see the site at, I know its not reality, but u dont see that at first.
I know, thats kinda why I like posting here believe it or not. Im fine with it, its just the name calling and the plain out right rudeness that isn’t nice.
Learn what materialistic means for a start.
Debating wether people are equal or not based on performance and genetic information is a scientific, philosophical and intellectual debate…not materialism, or a materialistic debate.
And yes I agree philosophically we are all born with equal value…..but in real terms, practical day to day living, we are not. Understand that point before you comment. I know some men here may think philosophically that men are born better, I dont……but I do think that with some things men are better than woman.
To answer your question, no I am not gay…..and I am argueing about it because I saw that comment as an overall flaw in your general arguement.
I also think that if a woman assumes something like that, its pretty fucked up. Would you agree with that?
Plus your a woman commenting on this site……we will pick apart ANYTHING you say.
Also understand that we deal with a lot of generalisations here. YOU may not do any of the things that we complain about but that doesnt mean the majority doesnt. I would not place my fioncee in the same category as the woman we bitch about here. But again, I disagree with some of the things she does or thinks which I attribute to her gender.
Learn what materialistic means for a start.
Debating wether people are equal or not based on performance and genetic information is a scientific, philosophical and intellectual debate…not materialism, or a materialistic debate.
And yes I agree philosophically we are all born with equal value…..but in real terms, practical day to day living, we are not. Understand that point before you comment.
To answer your question, no I am not gay…..and I am argueing about it because I saw that comment as an overall flaw in your general arguement.
I also think that if a woman assumes something like that, its pretty fucked up. Would you agree with that?
Plus your a woman commenting on this site……we will pick apart ANYTHING you say.
Gosh you are being very argumentative..over nothing. You have completely taken this out of context. I answered a question of how women were coming to this assumption. I gave two answers. You took one and assumed that I believed it (which I don’t). You’re getting overly defensive, whats that about?
This statement can be considered racist, depending on the social context. Generally, the word “nigger” is seen as derogitive and an insult, micking the days of slavery or what else, so unless this is intended through the word “niggers” then, no it would not be racist.
1) I don’t actully have any evidence that nayone here is gay
2) I’m assuming most aren’t, who else would spend this much time thinking about women?
3) One of MY criteria for contemplating whether or not someone is gay does not actually involve woman hating. Actully it ight… I don’t know, depends on the circumstance
4) I don’t think all homosexuals hate the opposite sex (I know many gay people and they are some of the livest, bubbley and fun loving people I know. And they get on quite well with the oppsite sex, more so then their own)
*sigh* You are born equal to EVERYONE. You were born naked and so were they. People are different, and different factors in the individuals life determines their ultimate outcome. You’re talking equal in a materialistic sense. I’m not. I’m talking more in a philosophical sense, everyone is equal, we have all peed our pants. No one is exempt. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think a serial rapist is on the same level as Mother Theresa. However, we are equal in the sense that we deserve the same rights and responsibilities…in the beginning (birth).
This is my definition of equality in practice.
To be honest, if there were two guys that liked me, and I really liked them, I wouldn’t go out with either. Purely coz I think it would be wrong to go out with someone while I liked another. But thats just me.