Turkey Gobblers!
Women are obsessed with plastic surgery, and one of the fastest growing surgical trends this Thanksgiving is the rejuvenating, revitalizing, reinvigorating vaginoplasty.
The rejuvenating, revitalizing, reinvigorating vaginoplasty puts the “tight” in a twat; it takes the “loose” from a labia; it crams the “new” into a snootch; and it takes at least three kids off the odometer. When marriage counseling doesn’t work, and since women are too possessive to give threesomes a shot, they’re turning to the same thing that brought us taxes, Charles Manson, and the Vagina Monologues.
The vagina.
Nothing proves that women hate sex — while simultaneously being obsessed with it — like “the vaginoplasty”. Their obsession with sexual perfection consumes them and manifests in shame, hatred, and bitterness. Women are obsessed with their vaginas like that woman in Misery was obsessed with Stephan King. If it was legal, vaginas should all get restraining orders.
Women and their vaginas remind me of a man with a classic 1958 California Spyder Ferrari, who spends all day polishing it and talking dirty to it without ever taking it out for a test drive. What a waste.
At least the Ferrari is still good to look at.
Turkey Gobblers
Since women don’t want to use their vaginas, they’re trying to turn them into something a vagina will never be: easy on the eyes. I have news for you ladies out there. You can’t turn a turkey into a swan. You can’t turn a floppy whoopie cushion into The David. You can’t turn a turkey gobbler into a 16 year old clam, no matter how much bleaching some man is paying for.
Women are disgusted by themselves and stupid. Forget about makeup and perfume, they can’t even figure out what their vaginas are for.
They’re ATM’s, not works of art.
Vaginoplasties are like Viagra for women
False. Viagra is for women. Without Viagra thousands of men would leave their old, boring wives every year for young, hot ones who could put some lead in their pencil. Then they would use that pencil to sign the divorce papers.
A vagina is a lot like a boat. You dump tons of money into it and no matter how great it sounds, it’s only fun a few times a year during the summer. Otherwise, it’s a lot of expensive upkeep.
Women all over the country are trying to put some vitality back in their vag and some “clamp” back in their clams this season with expensive and risky plastic surgery. Since I know it’s not going to work, I’ve got a procedure women should try first which is guaranteed to improve their sexual attraction:
Shut up and hit a treadmill.
Happy Thanksgiving.
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November 23rd, 2007 at 5:45 am - IP Man-Hash: 46de44d9caf39
What the fuck is that even meant to mean
November 23rd, 2007 at 5:46 am - IP Man-Hash: f68191fe56ea6
Creamy like a whipped sunday on a sleeping goat…. Does that do it for ya?
November 23rd, 2007 at 5:47 am - IP Man-Hash: f68191fe56ea6
God your sick
November 23rd, 2007 at 5:48 am - IP Man-Hash: 9cebcfc8ad687
No I mean ‘mixed race’
Are you an ‘also ran’?
November 23rd, 2007 at 5:49 am - IP Man-Hash: f68191fe56ea6
There ya go!! Plantus has got the hang! but just try to throw some random oafish insults in there ok?
November 23rd, 2007 at 5:49 am - IP Man-Hash: a8af11a00dc28
No ur just a sick tool
November 23rd, 2007 at 5:50 am - IP Man-Hash: 46de44d9caf39
Does that even matter when you see a sleeping girl
November 23rd, 2007 at 5:56 am - IP Man-Hash: 46de44d9caf39
Whats wrong? Stop posting cause ur mother fell asleep?
November 23rd, 2007 at 6:01 am - IP Man-Hash: a8af11a00dc28
Yeah maybe the chick he was talking about was his dog
November 23rd, 2007 at 6:03 am - IP Man-Hash: a8af11a00dc28
me man talk big have little intelegence shows when they have sick random comments
November 23rd, 2007 at 6:04 am - IP Man-Hash: 46de44d9caf39
It was probably his mother, on her death bed. Creepy asshole. Godam he acts like Cartman when he goes on Maury Povich “Cunt I do what i want”
November 23rd, 2007 at 6:09 am - IP Man-Hash: f68191fe56ea6
http://content.answers.com/main/content/wp/en/8/8d/601_image_21.jpg
You mean that? Yeah, when I read his comments that’s the voice I imagine.
November 23rd, 2007 at 6:10 am - IP Man-Hash: a8af11a00dc28
who said it was plantus
November 23rd, 2007 at 6:17 am - IP Man-Hash: f68191fe56ea6
No one. You have the same IP address though. I’m just assuming you’re two different people.
November 23rd, 2007 at 8:35 pm - IP Man-Hash: 0082119de578d
What is wrong with you? Why do you have no respect for half the population? This makes me very sad. I can’t believe you! *sigh* I think you need to go seek help for this anger you have. It’s not healthy to be so angry and have that much hatrid. Just remember where you cam from.
November 23rd, 2007 at 9:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: 3b885d99d2893
Ooops there we go again. Miss Margy adds to the tally.
Pregnancy card play number: 7.
*D3C*
November 23rd, 2007 at 10:57 pm - IP Man-Hash: e1caec5062137
While fucking Lois, I sometimes miss and hit the wrong hole at superspeed… It’s no accident though.
November 23rd, 2007 at 11:18 pm - IP Man-Hash: 11837f5061f91
Women. So predictable.
November 23rd, 2007 at 11:44 pm - IP Man-Hash: 2998d637ad7de
Funny… feminists ‘thinkers’ generally agree that men are responsible for the creation of language, they even proposed to create their own because contemporary languages are “patriarchal” and therefore inherently misogynistic by nature.
Of course, both arguments are stupid, language was created almost accidentally by everyone. People of both sexes initially used grunts and gestures, and it naturally grew more complex as time went on. Most mainstream theories regarding the invention of language make no claim that either sex was solely responsible for it. Even if they did, it is absolutely impossible to make a case either way and would reside strictly in the realm of opinion.
November 24th, 2007 at 12:05 am - IP Man-Hash: f68191fe56ea6
Mark is right. But it is generally accepted that women detailed language which enhanced the bond between the community which made everything run smoothly, while men only needed basic sounds to communicate to other men whilst hunting.