Weddings are Golden Toilets…Flush

Is it any surprise to no one that a woman’s second favorite past-time: having a wedding, is a huge waste of time and money?

It sure is.

Or it sure isn’t. I’m not really sure how to answer that question, so I’ll just say it. Weddings are a complete waste of time and money and are the stupidest thing that a new couple can do.

Let me give a hypothetical situation that may or may not have happened six thousand, five hundred times a day every day this year — in America alone.

Johnny Everyman (twenty-five years old with a degree in Business and Economics and a summer job selling kitchen knives) is going to enter into a bond of legal matrimony with Jill Princess-Complex (twenty-two with a degree in Art History and who has never had a job that earned more than minimum wage in her life). Sound familiar? You bet it does.

Is this new couple going to:

A) Put a down payment on a house with their savings and token gifts from family members and friends.
B) Elope for like a hundred bucks to beautiful and romantic Downtown Courthouse.
C) Have an extravaganzic gala that will drain their bank accounts, stock their kitchen with glitzy, over-priced wares from Eddie Bauer, and leave every moment in their relationship from that point on to lurk in the shadows of lost potential.

That’s why men think weddings are stupid. Because we’re better than women at starting a family and laying the foundations for a healthy relationship with a significant other. Call us all softies for it if you want, but it’s completely true.

Here’s fact that may surprise you in a fun way. Even on women’s home turf: weddings, men can run circles around them. For instance — you might want to step back for this one — how many women do you think know the 6 C’s of diamonds, the main ingredient to any engagement ring? As a man, I can just rattle them right off the top of my head and for all you know I’m not even married.

Cut
Clarity
Color
Certification
Carat

And of course the sixth C is the one wearing it.

The bottom line is that calling a comb “Indestructible” doesn’t make it so. It’s still just a plastic piece of shit that isn’t worth the paper it’s printed on.

Next time you’re going to get married men, just think about it like this: Don’t.

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353 Responses to “Weddings are Golden Toilets…Flush”

Pages: [1] 2 3 4 5 6 718 » Show All

  1. Mansman Says:

    Haha!…Western Men get all the pussy they want.

    I thought we were all gay, had small dicks and couldn’t get laid!

    Oh wait, that’s only shaming language from the Fembots HERE.

    -Gotta love the REAL world. Yeah baby.

  2. C Says:

    Holy shit- yet more fog clearing from my before my eyes. Pretty much all the married guys that have ever hit on me have felt like they were pressured into marriage, or had naggy bitchy wives…I had to do some deep analysis to see that…maybe women really are crazy and stupid…

  3. C Says:

    So, if a woman loves a man, has any dignity, and character she will sign a prenup, no questions asked on the spot, not give a fuck about diamonds, or weddings even, and she will not sit on her ass, but will pull her fair load as far as finances. She will also not expect a man to relieve her of any debt that she incurred before they met, and she will take responsibility for that…

    Hey,why do you think that so many women do all that horrible shit to their husbands??

  4. Mansman Says:

    C said:

    So, if a man loves a woman, has any dignity, and character he will sign a prenup, no questions asked on the spot, not give a fuck about XX, or XX even, and he will not sit on his ass, but will pull his fair load as far as finances. He will also not expect a woman to relieve him of any debt that he incurred before they met, and he will take responsibility for that…

    Sounds fair to me…what’s the problem there?

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  8. Doubt Fish Says:

    Girly-girls:
    Fighting free speech with spam mail since 1996…
    Apparantly a little sign is not good enough for these whores - my former email address got signed up for 100 or so Christian-group spam newsletters. I suppose that’s one way to force your opinions on me - and then the skanky bitch impersonated her father.
    I also fucking hate, hate the girly-girls who say they’re using their bitch’s computer to put us in our place - with smack talk.

    Anyone who would do this shit in person, if our culture was fair and just - I’d rip their fucking braces out. I had a fucking bitch explain to me that she got braces at 20 to look younger - to look like jailbait. I just walked off, but due to her generally snotish attitude and the way she exploited people made me want to introduce her to the joys of lopsided bras.

  9. Doubt Fish Says:

    Business email address, should I say. I don’t use it for tête - à - tête, but then I couldn’t if I wanted to. It’s got too much spam that it’s just too much trouble to root through all of the penis enlargement ads and Christian womyn’s group propaganda to go through that on a daily basis.
    Nonetheless, I must admire the creativity and ingenuity of the girly-girl - they may not have the spirit to grasp it, but they fight utilitarianism with their own brand of materialism. They’re trying to buy me!
    How flattering.

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  17. Billy Says:

    Doubt Fish said:

    Girly-girls:
    Fighting free speech with spam mail since 1996…
    Apparantly a little sign is not good enough for these whores - my former email address got signed up for 100 or so Christian-group spam newsletters. I suppose that’s one way to force your opinions on me - and then the skanky bitch impersonated her father.
    I also fucking hate, hate the girly-girls who say they’re using their bitch’s computer to put us in our place - with smack talk.

    Anyone who would do this shit in person, if our culture was fair and just - I’d rip their fucking braces out. I had a fucking bitch explain to me that she got braces at 20 to look younger - to look like jailbait. I just walked off, but due to her generally snotish attitude and the way she exploited people made me want to introduce her to the joys of lopsided bras.

    I completely understand. Women suck as people

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  20. Sway Says:

    As a woman, knowing what lying bitches we are, I don’t understand why any man would get married.

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