Women Are As Cold As An Ice Cold Beer

Women allegedly feel colder than men all the time because they have a higher surface to volume ratio and less muscle density. That’s a nice way of saying that they have a higher body fat percentage. And that’s a nice way of saying that women are fatter than men. That much is obviously true. Being skinny is a thing and men are better than women at all things. What next? Is the sky blue? Yep.

That seems to be one of the reasons that Curves: The Women’s Gym is taking off like a house fire. Actually, Curves is only successful because it is run by a man: Robbie Allan. If Curves was a gym for women and run by women, it would be about as successful as “lesbians” raising a child.

The real truth of these cold fronts are that women are scientifically engineered to constantly bitch.

You can check out the scientific explanation for the above here, but only if you’re a man. The site doesn’t forbid women like this one does, but it might as well because it doesn’t take a lot of extra time explaining simple things. Simple everyday things like words and points that men understand instantly without even thinking about it.

When you prove something to a woman, you need make sure that any point you have to make can also be made in the form of crayons on construction paper. If it can’t, then you’re speaking Greek to her. And if she is Greek then you’re speaking Pig Latin.

Women can’t speak or understand Pig Latin for the life of them. No one knows why, but I have a pretty good hunch. Just remember that next time you need to get a secret message past a woman, say it in Pig Latin. To her it just sounds like the teacher from Charlie Brown.

Women are colder than men because they’re fat and love to complain. They are pretty much engineered to complain. That’s why they have periods.

Related Articles: