One Small Step for Man, One Enormous Step Backwards for Women

From the point of view of a sportsman, there is nothing worse than watching children at play. Unforced errors, misunderstandings of basic rules and protocols, a complete disregard for fundamentals; all of these and more plague little leagues across the Earth. However, as a man, there is nothing more fulfilling than watching these same children playing in a league that is all their own — free to excel and set the bar as they see fit in a system that’s bent over backwards to suit them.

That’s exactly how I feel about Hilary Clinton being inducted into the Women’s Hall of Fame.

Women have a hall of fame? Isn’t that cute.

Such notables in the Women’s Hall of Fame are:

Dr. Rita Rossi Colwell – the first female director of the National Science Foundation; honored for getting a fucking job, which truly is a feat for women.

Antonia Novello – the first lady Surgeon General of the United States. Wait a minute. I’m seeing a theme here.

If you were to look up the entrants in the Men’s Hall of Fame you wouldn’t find any because there is no Hall of Fame for men. That’s actually called history. That’s why it starts with the “his” prefix, because women don’t mean shit in it. Things like the women’s hall of fame are exactly why. If women spent less time talking about how fucking great they were and more time doing things like inventing wheels, fire, and nuclear bombs, they might have a footnote in the appendix. As it stands, however, Lassie is the most famous bitch in history. I can’t see that changing.

Go scroll through the list of beatified broads for yourself. You’ll find that usually all it takes to get into the Women’s Hall of Fame is a single career — something that a man will have six or seven of by the time he is done sticking it to the business world. Unless you’re Hilary Clinton. She got into the Women’s Hall of Fame for not giving any kind of a shit when her rich and powerful husband went on a Sausage Party all over town. But if you think about it, what could possibly be a more laudable female trait? A woman who gets her panties in a twist about matrimonial indiscretion is like a man with a coke problem. Everything could be running along smoothly and then BAM! The whole thing’s blown to hell in a hand basket all because she couldn’t keep her nose out of it.

The Women’s Hall of Fame (just like the Women’s Chess League and Valentine’s Day) is just one knot is a long yarn of female self congratulatory bullshit. It’s just like little league football or baseball. The rules are totally different, you can take timeouts whenever you want because someone skinned their knee or got pregnant and no one calls you out for being a fucking hypocrite for doing it, and unless you have to watch and give a shit about the whole pathetic deal, you don’t.

The first woman that refuses admission into this joke of a Hall gets the much more prestigious, male-endowed’s Honorary Man of the Month Award.

Browse through all the greatest women that history doesn’t give a shit about.
Every dog gets its day.