Parking. Fuck Off.

Do you know what it is to be a man? Being a man is getting out of your car, looking at your fucked up parking job, and then getting back in your car and parking it correctly.

Being a woman is what I saw about ten minutes ago. It’s pulling up to the curb like a drunken teenager, mashing your tire against the concrete like you’re humping a doorknob, and then getting out of your car whilst on a cell phone and letting someone else deal with the whole shit.

By someone else, I mean ’some man’, who is more than likely going to have to pay for that tire when it blows the fuck up.

Men are better drivers than woman. Think of driving like fucking. Men are better than woman at it in everyway. We men initiate it, we do all the fucking work (including paying for it), and we let everyone know when it’s done. Who gives a fuck what women think about when it’s done. That’s like a bus driver just walking around town telling banks it’s time to close up for the day. What the fuck does a bus driver know about banking?

Dick. And that’s exactly what women know about fucking and parking and also driving.

Women can’t park for shit. Have you ever watched a woman park? It hurts me in my balls. As a man I have these things called testicles and they fucking hurt when I have to watch a woman drive a 60,000 dollar something in between two other 60,000 dollar something’s. I can’t explain it. Science can’t explain it either because gonads are more scientifically advanced than anything that has ever been. I’m just telling you what hurts and where.

You know what else women suck at? Backing out of their parking spots.

I don’t know where in the fuck women get the idea into their heads that they should drive. They can’t. They can’t jump the very first fucking hurdle of that man-race, which is pulling out of and pulling into a parking spot. I’m going to state the very obvious for the sake of completeness right now. The big fucking cement shit that stops your car from rolling into the beauty parlor or the food market (which is commonly called a curb) is imaginary. That’s right. It’s imaginary — to men at least. Any man will pull up to a curb and use that as a suggestion.

“Maybe now is a good time to stop my fucking car,” a man will say whilst humping a doorknob. “Maybe I’ve driven as close to this bullshit boutique as someone can get.”

Well you have. Now get the fuck out and look at the five inch dent you just put in your tire. Five inches is huge. If anyone tells you it isn’t, ask them how they’d feel about a five inch stick of TNT exploding in their cat’s butthole.

Probably they wouldn’t feel good about it. Fuck you, women shouldn’t drive.

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45 Comments in 42 threads.»

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Comment by Jack-The-Ripper
2009-10-21 18:23:40 - IP Man-Hash: 5104b5e0893bc

ALL THE MEN RISE UP ALL THE BROTHERS RISE UP ANSWER THE BATTLE CALL TRACK THE CUNTS WHO COME ON THIS SITES TO THEIR HOMES LET THEM THINK TWICE ABOUT HW MUCH THEIR CUNTS CAN BLEED I HAVE FORMED A HUGE ARMY OF FRIENDS AROUND THE WORLD WE ARE GOING TO DESTROY THESE CUNTS IN A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME! ALL THE MEN START RECRUITING OTHER BROTHERS AROUND THE WORLD YOUR FRIENDS FAMILY WORKMATES THE TIME IS NOW! THE EARTH WILL BLOOD WHEN WE MAKE THESE FUCKING CUNT WHORES BLEED STABBING VICIOUSLY THERE’S NO STOPPING US CUNTS! EVERYTHING YOU CAN SEE WITH YOUR EYES BELONG TO MEN SO TAKE IT BACK! FIGHT NOW! STAND UP NOW! STRIKE NOW! 3 BILLION MEN HUNTING YOU CUNTS DOWN WHERE CAN YOU RUN WHERE CAN YOU HIDE! CHAINSAW RIPPING YOUR CUNTS OPEN FOR ALL THE BILLIONS OF BABIES ABORTED! ALL CUNTS WILL PAY!

 
Comment by Haha89
2009-10-01 13:45:10 - IP Man-Hash: b2a3745f0d705

Chris AND MarkEMark=Mr. Empty-pants

 
Comment by Chevy Bob
2009-05-26 13:03:42 - IP Man-Hash: 155e0ce21aed7

L
M
F
A
O
!
!
!
!
!
!

 
Comment by Whatev
2008-11-22 10:08:18 - IP Man-Hash: 3af905d2bc66b

It’s hard to believe most of you are grown men and women.

Comment by RB
2008-11-22 11:14:18 - IP Man-Hash: edc731f23d853

It’s hard to believe that you are a man.So GTFO.

 
 
Comment by Misty
2008-07-22 23:02:54 - IP Man-Hash: 2551d7b52f5d9

LMAO!!! LMAO! LMAO! hahahaha. Not all chicks park their cars like that though.

Comment by Matty
2008-08-29 00:32:48 - IP Man-Hash: 37e6c3bef4774

lol, misty babes not all chicks park cars like that, but they still cant talk on their mobile phone and drive. If they are using a GPS its worse.

Try driving a truck during the day with all the women on the road, just cut in front of you and shit and then they give YOU the finger because you nearly ran up their ass

fuckers/

 
 
Comment by Fed Up
2008-05-11 08:10:56 - IP Man-Hash: 0ae520af6d01b

sonyad said:

How about women start showing a degree of their famous, bountiful and unabridged empathy towards their cars or, better still, other people’s cars they happen to be driving, not to mention some man’s wallet somewhere.

I’ve driven a car that’s been tormented by a lady driver for only just 40 thous. k since brand new before I took it over. The clutch disk was off to hell, it burnt 11 litres to the hundred, drive belt worn to bloody hell as well and it would habitually jump out of gear for no fucking reason.

Just watch a woman change gears in your car, Dick. That ought to have you laying quietly on your side all curled up for a good few minutes. The way they jerk and erk the stick shift and prod the accelerator to bloody hell while resting on the clutch pedal. Murder.

-Women and driving. (mutually exclusive)

No friggin’ doubt. In most cases, women treat their cars like they treat their men. Men understand that you have to take car of something to keep it running well and doing what it’s supposed to be doing . Women just run things into the ground and it’s somebody else’s problem when it finally croaks after years of abuse: their cars, their relationships, you name it.

Comment by Prospero
2009-03-10 07:25:02 - IP Man-Hash: d466cff600157

yea, my mom, sister, and girlfriend all say “if you can’t find it, grind it”

women+clutching=terrors

 
 
Comment by son of the suns
2007-11-14 08:41:46 - IP Man-Hash: d653cff06dec4

wife said:

I’m a newlywed and I always initiate sex, I am the only person with a job. I just want to say that I just feel for you and I hope that whoever hurt you bad enough to cause all this hate and these feelings is someone that you can forgive someday so that you can move on with oyour life. I’ll be praying for you.

All who come to the dark side come by lost love, only to linger in it’s memory.

 
Comment by MansVoice
2007-11-14 08:19:04 - IP Man-Hash: 7b55501cead9a

@ Wife: I am 17. I have never been burned by a woman. However, I have encountered numerous neurotic feminized women which explains me being on this site. You do not have to touch fire to know that fire is hot, surely you have heard of this on the show? What the fuck. Stop rehashing the same “Oh I am the exception. I feel sorry for you” blah blah bullshit.

Dick isnt a victim, I am not a victim, the men on this site arent victims.

 
Comment by wife
2007-11-14 08:13:51 - IP Man-Hash: 60f5ee5a5f23b

I’m a newlywed and I always initiate sex, I am the only person with a job. I just want to say that I just feel for you and I hope that whoever hurt you bad enough to cause all this hate and these feelings is someone that you can forgive someday so that you can move on with oyour life. I’ll be praying for you.

 
Comment by Mansman
2007-09-02 05:23:13 - IP Man-Hash: 5556903c41ed8

Females can’t drive because their attitude is all fucked up. Even more alarming is that they have a huge truckload of denial about their incompetence when operating any kind of machinery, but especially dangerous fucking machinery.

It’s performance pressure they simply can’t take, and there’s a reason.

Having no spacial skills, no commonsense, no quick thinking or decision making ability…just doesn’t help. Having a real possibility of also not being able to blame anyone else for some serious fuck up…completely doesn’t help.

These things and more place such a strain on the female brain that everybody around them when they drive is in very real danger. At least you can keep any eye out for those stupid ass stick on flowers they all use to block the fuck out of the driver’s view through their rear window, and keep yourself a safe distance away (ie: at least 2km).

It’s a whole world of pain just thinking about how female drivers manage to get from point A to B without killing themselves and everybody else along the way.

I laugh when I see women driving Mercs and BMW’s around. The guy who owns it must really be getting some good poon.

 
Comment by Chris
2007-05-18 17:52:32 - IP Man-Hash: eb0193ec17432

I agree totally.
Today I saw the best: she cruised through a stop sign, looking at herself in the rearvision mirror, eating a donut, and talking on her cellphone.

 
Comment by Jim
2007-05-18 14:00:05 - IP Man-Hash: 5053c245ceb5c

Fucking Right. There was once a women driver in F-1, and yeh she was fucking shit.
At least that was the end of that, no PC bullshit going on there anymore, untainted, unlike those damm submarines.

 
Comment by Fucking Yes
2007-05-17 19:51:14 - IP Man-Hash: 4d9b3aef41d8f

The reason why young female drivers are charged less for insurance than young male drivers is because men know how the fuck to stunt. The second a man gets in his car he does a man-fucking-tastic burnout and donuts all over the shitting fucking place. Because a MAN knows how to CONTROL his CAR.

A 16 year old girl, however, will grind the clutch and then roll gently into the nearest wall because she fucking sucks. Get off my road bitches.

 
Comment by Dick Masterson
2006-10-09 20:52:44 - IP Man-Hash: 4657e56d12e8e

smrtpants said:

And do you ‘truly laugh’ while biting the pillow or pitching to your catcher?

Classy.

-Dick

 
Comment by Bill
2006-10-09 19:20:34 - IP Man-Hash: c3e6ad25dbabc

smrtpants said:

Chris said:

Brilliant, just brilliant. I am starting to like you more and more. This is my mother all over 100% and all the other women I’ve seen too. I think you forgot to mention hill-parking/hill-starts though. Women suck at that too. I truly laugh when women cant seem to understand why some men are gay.

And do you ‘truly laugh’ while biting the pillow or pitching to your catcher?

As far as many women are concerned more men should finally admit that they’re gay and stop fucking wasting our time [and theirs] with inane excuses for why they can’t seem to ‘find the right woman’/keep getting fucked over by what seemed like a ‘nice pkg’ until she started being a bitch/are just so tired of women being poisonous sirens who just want to fuck with men [and not in a good way…after the n-th fuck-session that you guys have so graciously ’stuck it out for’…

Poor babies…maybe try re-enacting breast-feeding more often and you might get better results – then again, I can only speak for myself…while my mouth is free of obstructions…

Looks like this chick has some serious issues.
Perhaps if you would clean up your act a little, and stop dating the Beta males in the West End, you would not so bitter.

 
Comment by abaddon_fff
2006-10-07 20:42:04 - IP Man-Hash: ece419b219a55

smrtpants said:

And do you ‘truly laugh’ while biting the pillow or pitching to your catcher?

-Smrtpants, you are a column of the laws of women. What a misandric bitch.

As far as many women are concerned more men should finally admit that they’re gay and stop fucking wasting our time [and theirs] with inane excuses for why they can’t seem to ‘find the right woman’/keep getting fucked over by what seemed like a ‘nice pkg’ until she started being a bitch/are just so tired of women being poisonous sirens who just want to fuck with men [and not in a good way…after the n-th fuck-session that you guys have so graciously ’stuck it out for’…

–Sounds like you “struck out” smrtpants. Sorry that you’re a whore, and you have bad taste in Men. I’ll give you a hint though, its called life, get over it, it will end soon enough. Life is short.

Poor babies…maybe try re-enacting breast-feeding more often and you might get better results – then again, I can only speak for myself…while my mouth is free of obstructions…

-Your shaming language is childish, much like most of your posts. -

-Strength and Honor-

 
Comment by diamatik
2006-10-07 18:51:46 - IP Man-Hash: eab4c21bb6be5

smrtpants’ seemingly endless and pointless chatter ended with her saying:
- then again, I can only speak for myself…while my mouth is free of obstructions…

I’ve got an obstruction for your mouth right here.

 
Comment by sonyad
2006-10-07 14:23:25 - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7

Yet more scatological misandry. Quaint.

 
Comment by smrtpants
2006-10-07 11:46:07 - IP Man-Hash: a8cd80253d019

Chris said:

Brilliant, just brilliant. I am starting to like you more and more. This is my mother all over 100% and all the other women I’ve seen too. I think you forgot to mention hill-parking/hill-starts though. Women suck at that too. I truly laugh when women cant seem to understand why some men are gay.

And do you ‘truly laugh’ while biting the pillow or pitching to your catcher?

As far as many women are concerned more men should finally admit that they’re gay and stop fucking wasting our time [and theirs] with inane excuses for why they can’t seem to ‘find the right woman’/keep getting fucked over by what seemed like a ‘nice pkg’ until she started being a bitch/are just so tired of women being poisonous sirens who just want to fuck with men [and not in a good way…after the n-th fuck-session that you guys have so graciously ’stuck it out for’…

Poor babies…maybe try re-enacting breast-feeding more often and you might get better results – then again, I can only speak for myself…while my mouth is free of obstructions…

 
Comment by Chris
2006-10-07 10:16:20 - IP Man-Hash: 59274e43755d7

Brilliant, just brilliant. I am starting to like you more and more. This is my mother all over 100% and all the other women I’ve seen too. I think you forgot to mention hill-parking/hill-starts though. Women suck at that too. I truly laugh when women cant seem to understand why some men are gay.

 

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