The Big O
I was recently watching some television (where a properly inspired man can learn just about anything he wants) and I learned some alarming statistics.
70% of women have never had an orgasm during sex.
That’s interesting, I thought. I would have guessed it was way lower than that because really who gives a shit? You can’t squeeze blood from a rock. Then my suspicions of data tampering were confirmed.
85% of men do not enjoy performing oral sex.
Horseshit. The correct percentage is 100.
Men are better than women at having orgasms during sex. It’s because if men were as bad as women at it, there would only be like 50 people. And all of them would have headaches. Men are in it for the species and we don’t let our personal problems and frigid attitudes get in the way of that.
That’s an on going theme with women. They let their personal problems get in their own way and everyone else’s way like an out of control fire hose of gloom and doom. For example how many women have you seen crying at the workplace? Although she probably had good reason for doing so, she probably also forgot that there is no good reason for crying in the workplace. Perhaps the boss was responding too well to her thinly veiled sexual invitations — or perhaps he wasn’t responding enough. Either way it’s bullshit. A Woman at work is a kitten stuck up a tree. No clue how she got there, constant crying, and no way to get up or down.
What a coincidence that that perfectly describes women in the bedroom as well.
Women (and men who are lying to get laid — completely masculine kudos for you men too because that’s a good strategy) will tell you that it’s somehow a man’s fault that sexually all women behave like Godot — or Guffman, whatever you want. This is wrong. If women really think it’s a man’s fault, then shouldn’t it also become a man’s charge to get a woman’s fat ass into the gym every once in a while? Because they definitely don’t relinquish that right at the same time. Try it yourself and see. Though you might cost yourself two to three weeks of crappy sex.
If a woman’s orgasm is a man’s responsibility somehow then let me tell you what becomes a woman’s responsibility. How about not gaining 25 pounds and not jawing endlessly about nothing before, during, and after sex. How about not insisting that men and women can be friends or any one of a million other “wilters” that women seem to have on tap like men have answers and good advice, and that they spout out like they’re playing fucking Family Feud.
“We asked a hundred people what is guaranteed to kill an erection. My new professor at community college is really nice to me because he thinks I show an excellent knowledge and passion for the subject? Survey says!? Ding fucking Ding.”
Women will never stop doing any of that though because the last thing any woman wants is a healthy relationship — sexual or otherwise. That counts for the female orgasm thing too. What oh what would a woman do without the ability to endlessly bitch about the alleged “sexual inadequacy” of her partner to all her catty friends? Women priorities are fucked like that. They feel guilty lying to their life-sucking succubus friends, but not at all guilty about making your love life miserable. Go figure.
The day women take responsibility for those cluster fucks is the day that I single handedly end the drought of female orgasms. Good thing we know that’s never going to happen though, because like I said…100%.
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A POEM FOR CUNTS – FROM ONE MAN TO ANOTHER
Women are irrational, that’s all there is to that.
There heads are full of cotton, hay, and rags.
They’re nothing but exasperating, irritating,
vacillating, calculating, agitating,
Maddening and infuriating hags.
Why can’t a woman be more like a man?
Men are so honest, so thoroughly square,
Eternally noble, historic’ly fair,
Who, when you win, will always give your back a pat…
Well, why can’t a woman be like THAT?
Why do girl do everything the others do?
Can’t a woman learn to use her head?
Why do they do ev’rything their mothers do?
Why don’t they grow up- well, like their father instead?
Why can’t a woman take after a man?
Men are so pleasant, so easy to please,
Whenever you are with them, you’re always at ease,
Would you be slighted if I didn’t speak for hours?
Would you be livid if I had a drink or two?
Would you be wounded if I never sent you flowers?
Well, why can’t a woman be like YOU?
One man in a million may shout a bit.
Now and then there’s one with slight defects.
One, perhaps, whose truthfulness you doubt a bit…
But by and large we are a marvelous sex!
Why can’t a woman take after like a man?
Cause men are so friendly, good natured and kind.
A better companion you never will find.
If I were hours late for dinner, would you bellow?
If I forgot your silly birthday, would you fuss?
Would you complain if I took out another fellow?
Well, why can’t a woman be like US?
Why can’t a woman be more like a man?
Men are so decent, such regular chaps.
Ready to help you through any mishaps.
Ready to buck you up whenever you are glum.
Why can’t a woman be a CHUM?
Why is thinking something women never do?
Why is logic never even tried?
Straight’ning up their hair is all they ever do.
Why don’t they straighten up the mess that’s inside?
Why can’t a woman behave like a man?
Would I start weeping like a bathtub overflowing?
And carry on as if my home were in a tree?
Would I run off and never tell me where I’m going?
Then why can’t a woman…. be like ME?
- My Fair Lady
(Best Picture 1964)
NOTE: THESE WORDS WERE WRITTEN –>> FOR A REASON.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Chris, holy fuck I thought you wrote that. That is SO FUCKING true today.
I notice that you, unlike the cuntdouchbaggerybitchslutwhoreasswhipe that is livianafuckface, CREDITED your poem.
And it is in LINE with this theme of the site. Instead of her bullshit.
You know…. it’s WAY better that I didn’t write it myself.
It’s the 1964 version of MABTW — WORD FOR WORD.
It’s a CLASSIC / TIMELESS / OSCAR WINNING story. And it still plays to packed houses and standing ovations across the western world today.
I recommend EVERY man out there watch that movie because even though it’s a “musical”, it is a BRILLIANT example on so many levels.
Including the “nice guy” who does NOT get the girl – even though he works his fucking ass off to please and appease her.
The Professor (Higgins) is the “mysogynist”. Highly educated, he does NOT under any circumstances tolerate terrible, second class female behavior….. she fucking HATES, HATES, HATES him…. but she comes back toe HIM . . . of course.
The “nice guy” loses.
Of course.
Hilarious that no woman ever tried to stop the movie studios from printing it to DVD and it will be on BlueRay soon.
The film’s dialogue (and the arguements) between HE AND SHE are VERY much in perfect sync with the dialogue and outraged females here.
If I were on Dr. Phil, I would have bought him a copy – SIGNED IT “MATBW” – told him to go home and watch it, and shut the fuck up because he doesn’t know a fucking thing.
If you PAY ATTENTION and WATCH you will notice the very MORAL of the movie teaches a woman that if they want men to WANT to have anything to do with them – and if they want OTHER WOMEN to want to be like them…. all they need to do is BEHAVE AND SHUT THE FUCK UP.
The other song that REALLY hits home is called “Let a woman in my life???”…. here is a little verse you will enjoy.
“Let a woman in your life?
And your serenity is through….
She’ll redecorate your home,
from the cellar to the dome,
Then go on to the enthralling fun of overhauling YOU.
Let the OTHERS of my sex,
Tie the knot around their NECKS,
I’d be equally as willing,
For a DENTIST to be DRILLING,
…. than to ever let a woman in my life.
Let a woman in your life?
And you’re sabbatical is through,
In a line that never ends
Come an ARMY of her ‘friends’
…. come to jabber and to chatter and to tell her what the matter is with YOU.”
Beautifully accurate.
MABTW.
Yes Eliza hated Prof Higgins because he was hateful towards her. She explains this well. You should all pay particular attention to the question Prof Higgins poses to her, and her reply.
Mrs. Higgins: However did you learn good manners with my son around?
Eliza: It was very difficult. I should never have known how ladies and gentlemen really behaved, if it hadn’t been for Colnel Pickering. He always showed what he thought and felt about me as if I were something better than a common flower girl. You see, Mrs. Higgins, apart from the things one can pick up, the difference between a lady and a flower girl is not how she behaves, but how she is treated. I shall always be a common flower girl to Professor Higgins, because he always treats me like a common flower girl, and always will. But I know that I shall always be a lady to Colonel Pickering, because he always treats me like a lady, and always will.
There aren’t any Pickerings amongst you lot of paupers, so you won’t get any lady.
Pickering ended up providing for Eliza and Freddy, while Higgins didn’t.Says a lot about whimmin and their love of gentlemen and money.
RB.
Thee I invoke, bornless one
All woman, pure predator
Wherein conspiracy and impulse dwell
Like a seething fall from grace
Thee I worship…
Thou art darkest gabrielle
No church shall bar our path
Seductive evil drink your fill
Of the bleeding christ in your arms
You are in my dreams
The darkness in my eyes
The rapture in my screams
Black goddess arise
Nothing will keep us apart
We could kill them all
If our desire tore free
Our union is one, sweet, sinful eve
And the night draws in beside her
As we embrace the dark side by side
I pour my soul to those eyes full of fire
To harvest the seed ploughed inside her
Archangel, snare the flesh
Suck dry the ebbing wound
Leave them lifeless and broken
My beloved…
Oh, how I craved for you
You so pure and other-worldly with your scent of winter
Am I to bleed myself dry to see your delight?
And the fear retreats forever
(come to me…black goddess arise)
When my secrets are buried in thine
(come to me…black goddess arise)
Under seven stars we came together
(come to me…black goddess arise)
To plot the new ages decline
(come to me…arise!)
Ishtar my queen
Come forth to me
And help me seize
My future from the house of death
That in the release of immortality
I should slay their fucking nazarene
Ah…the lies…the jew…i kill for you
Hidden lusts will break the gates and swarm
As love secretes the thrill for war
The virgin raped shall seek to whore
She-wolf bare your snarling jaw
caught in thy net of shadows,
What dreams hast thou to show?
Who treads the silent meadows,
To worship thee below?
Dick seriously, this is more bullshit. Again we are for free speech. But posting fucking poetry instead of DICKscussion is a waste of our time.
I have great ones, but sadly, we don’t tell you, we can and do alone. It’s men that are the work, not women, when a man performs badly in bed it is impossible to get an orgasm. It takes a woman a different path to have one. We have to use our mind and body and force an orgasm, we have to fully embody one. We have to get alot of pressure and meditate on it the whole time during intercourse. Or we fail. Women know this, women that have great sex do know this. We cannot have one unless we mentally visualize it and know how to make it work. It doesn’t just happen, men honestly are little responsible for it, however they help achieve it through us.
That’s the DUMBEST fucking thing I’ve ever heard in my life. You have to FORCE yourself to do something about as natural as closing your eyes while sneezing? Jesus, If you have to “embody” something as mundane as an orgasm, imagine doing something as complex as repairing an internal combustion engine or flying a helicopter. I don’t know too many Man-chanics who stand there going “beeeee the engine, beeeee the engine”.. it just comes fucking natural to them.
Way to complicate something so uncomplicated.
MABTW
FUCK OFF YOU STUPID SELFISH BITCH. Going on about orgasms like men are supposed to give a fuck. Are you INSANE?????????
You expect men should talk to you, listen to you, go out with you, spend his valuable time with you, spend his valuable MONEY on you, take you out and show you a good time for hours and hours, call you again, be nice to you, respect you, treat you well, extend you every courtesy, and REPEAT IT ALL AGAIN???
. . . . and THEN you want him to CARE about being good in BED FOR YOU???? Are you bitches completely out of your mind?
FUCK YOU DRY IN THE ASS WITHOUT SPITTING.
TWICE.
You cunts don’t even make 1% of the effort men make. As long as that remains true – you can just SHUT THE FUCK UP ON OUR COCKS.
Menarebetterthanwomen.
Right on man!
Look at the mile-long list of what women “expect” men to give them, while they want the right to say “NO” to sex, and then when they are in bed with you they complain you are not living up to her standards.
You were 100% right when you said ignore women.
I would probably RAPE AND BEAT a woman who went off about her inability to have an orgasm and blamed BEING A SEXLESS FRIGID CUNT – ON A MAN.
Commander Scott is Right on the Money here too.
Good link.
Not only do other sites talk about violence against men. But violence against men is more and more considered justified by society. Regularly women are acquitted for killing their husbands because they claim abuse, often without much evidence. See Mary Winkler.
Think about a movie like ‘Drowning By Numbers’, where men are murdered for no apparent reason, without a hint of condemnation. Think about ‘Pelle the Conqueror’, where a man is castrated by his wife for infidelity, and the scene is presented to us as humorous. Contempt for men is quite pervasive in western society.
Millions of boys are growing up with the notion that the are morally and intellectually inferior to girls. If you think they are being taught equality, then you’re not paying attention.
Sooner or later it’s going to come back to haunt you.
this is called the men hating society – http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MID=367137231&MemberId=5116899954
fact of the matter is men are treated unequally now an so are women in their own ways. It will be a ways till this world will truly be equal, and even though ppl don’t realize these things go on still, just sum are hidden more then others -__-.
First off, women have orgasms but rarely through sex. If you have ever seen a womans legs shake like she’s having a seizure and her eyes roll back into her head like Mike Tyson just donkey punched her….you would find it obvious that she is having an orgasm. I have left several women unable to walk for a few minutes by going down on them.
Most women I dont like to go down on, but there have been some that I did enjoy it. ONE time only did it actually tate good, and I mean GOOD. The rest it has no taste or its bad. I assume that Hygene, current position of menstual cycle, and just personal genetics make up that variable.
Some women have beautiful vaginas and some have rank gray beef curtains.
Dick is spot on about women being lazy as HELL in bed and lying there like a damn futon. Finding women that are active in the sack or know what they are doing is rare, not impossible but damn rare.
I actually took the TIME when I was young to study the female anatomy and find out what gets women off and how to do so. So when I go down on a woman I can find the G spot and the clit and hit them both at the same time.
If ONLY women would do the same and learn how to give head correctly. Learning to be active in the sack would be nice too.
Are women just selfish, dumb, or both?
Alot of the jibber jabber you might experience right before a romp has much to do with a female trying to erect a ‘hazard/I’m different’ signal instead of you. Much of what is annoying about females is their compensation or attempt to cover over just how different they are. For example, most women are incapable of experiencing sexual pleasure unless they feel they are in a secure, interpersonal relationship. They already know this makes a guy want to put a gun in somebody’s mouth (figuratively).
Men have very little patience for emotional hooey gooey when it’s time for serioius thrills, chills..and mostly spills-they are just blessed w/ that simplicity. I don’t know why UHAUL & PENSKE have to be idling by the ton, invisibly, behind a woman everytime somebody tries to have sex w/ her…but it might hint at why she giving over to becoming the size of a truck. Why can’t she just lighten the hell up?
Women don’t have orgasms because thye are not hard-wired for it. From the point of view of evolutionary biology, there is simply no reason for women to orgasm.
P Coderch
Epic. This shit is truer than gravity. I am sick of the lack of responsibility women take in regards to anything. Jesus knew what was up. We need to just forgive people for their stupidity since they aren’t rational enough to know they are fucking up. I think that applies to women especially.
This guy is right. My gf seriously won’t stfu in bed and have sex like a decent human being. I think she is more interested in telling me about her damn stupid pets and gossiping about meaningless tripe than having a meaningful relationship with intimate moments. Seriously, women need to shut their mouths and think a little more before they talk. That goes for idiotic guys who speak without thinking as well.
Seriously.
for fuck sake men are men, women are women; just cos we are different doesnt mean we have to argue. have any of you people arguing had a proper partner that u cherish in your life? I feel sorry for you. This article is a bag of shit.
Gotta thank Billy for this:
“The male is a biological accident: the Y (male) gene is an incomplete X (female) gene, that is, has an incomplete set of chromosomes. In other words, the male is an incomplete female, a walking abortion, aborted at the gene stage.”
I always knew the idiot male’ flawed logic was due to genetics. Leave it to a woman to figure it out.
HAHAHHAHAHHAHAH, what a fool.
In case you didn’t know, that leg of the chromosome is FULL of bad genes and traits. Evolution at work right there.
I’m thinking that women are “emotional nutcases” in two contexts: 1.) while dating, and 2.) in the midst of a relationship. Let me give you an example of the 2nd type: when I was in my last girlfriends apt, I used a bathroom that was separate from hers. She got extremely upset with me when I left water droplets about the sink (which would evaporate), but it was quite OK for her bathtub in her bathroom to be filled with mold, which she refused to allow me to clean when I offered. I think what drives men crazy is the selective suspension of logic that we feel women often utilize.
In the first context, its often we feel we have to figure out what she wants us to be for her to be interested in us. Women are extremely selective and if you do one thing wrong while dating (like a gum wrapper in the car, or wearing mismatch socks) its all over with for her consideration for you in a romantic light. Of course, this does not even get into what happens if we have views that are different than hers! We find this very frustrating.
I think my (and other men as well) basic frustration with women in the romance/dating dept is that while women want the benefits of professional equality (which I am all for), they will often only consider a man thats “better than her” (makes more money,smarter, more skilled/talented) for a romantic relationship. Doesn’t seem fair.
Depends on the level of reason that you measure by. Pretty much every animal has one degree of reason or another, have you ever watched a dog deliberate the pros and cons of stealing a bit of food off the kitchen counter? (Usually comes down to, “Anybody watching me right now?”)
Granted (epithets). Anyway, I’m just not feeling particularly patient right now about the whole “I’m just out to f*! someone, why are all the women I f*! emotionally unstable nutcases?” Seems to be a pretty logical chain of events, so I don’t see the sense in getting upset about it. Generally speaking, any woman who is so insecure and/or loose that she’ll hop right in bed with someone she barely knows isn’t likely to be the best candidate for emotional maturity/ stability. Tends to be someone whose sense of personal value is wrapped up in body image, etc, as a result needs constant verification of that to bolster her sense of self-worth, which translates to being a needy nutcase.
Funny Ms. Lynn, except for the fact that the only species that are a mixture of emotional and reasonable (implying the ability to reason) are Homo Sapiens! C’mon, Lynn, I know your smarter than that. You need to come up with a better jibe. Want to try again?
At least Im not writing epititehs (sp?) at you as you would get from most posters on this site….
I guess you just need to be a bit more choosy about the species of creature you aim for.
Ah, couldn’t help it. Sometimes you just gotta go for the easy jibe.
The way I see it, depends on what you’re looking for. If you’re just looking for someone to f*!, you set the standards of what you get.
Correcto-mundo, Lynn. And in case you did not know, the advantage of sexual reproduction over asexual reproduction is the addition of a completely unique set of genes into the offspring. This is thought to be very important for the offsprings immunology, such that the offspring gets a mix of Major Histocompatibility Complex (aka MHC) genes from two unique individuals, thus increasing the variability of the MHC in the population and increasing the chance that more individuals will survive an ebola-like plague of humanity.
Sexual reproduction is ingenuous. I just which the creatures I want to F*ck were a little less emotional and a little more reasonable. Oh well.
MRS. LEVAN!
On this one, have to say that although I am unfamiliar with the theory, on premise it sounds more like invented hype designed to falsely promote the superiority of one chromosome type over another. (Ok, I’ll have to admit, overblown feminazism stupidity in action here) Just postulating here, but organisms that reproduce through asexual reproduction have the tendency to be highly simplified organisms, which is why you don’t see the average mammal, avian, most reptiles, etc. budding off offspring from random body parts. Diversified, sexual reproduction results in the ability to adapt, evolve, and thrive in a variety of environments, blah blah blah which seems to be the preference of the natural order for success.
Unless you’re an amoeba.
The fact that some traits are on both chromosomes doesn’t mean the Y is an incomplete X. First off, all mammals have the XY system. Birds have the WZ system. For birds WW is male and WZ is female. Which one is different is fairly irrelevant.
Additionally, female is the default setting embryonically. If the fetus doesn’t meet the requirements hormonally, they develop into a female.
The sheer notion of females “figuring it out” is ludicrous. All those barely if at all self aware female mammals didn’t figure anything out. It was watson and crick that determined the the structure of DNA, and the majority of people contributing to the research into the fundamentals of DNA were men, with one woman.
Flawed logic is amusing as well, considering spatial reasoning and logic has been tied to testosterone levels.
The Y chromosome is in a way the dominant gene. Not superior, but it overrides the default setting by way of the testes determination factor on the Y chromosome, facilitating male embryonic development. It makes sense to have more females considering the males ability to impregnate multiple partners. An evolutionary maximizing of resources, nothing more.