The Internal Ridiculous Service

Women should not work at the IRS. First of all, women don’t know what money is. They think it’s love — specifically the love their father didn’t give their mother because she was a raging bitch. Guess what it isn’t.

Money is a mark of hard work or smart work. All men know that. That’s why we make more money than women. It’s the same reason a fly fisherman catches more fish than a donkey. The fisherman knows what the fuck is going on.

Would you let a baboon handle your tax return? No. When you’re looking for a loan officer at a bank and there are only women working the Tuesday shift, do you walk right back out the door? Fuck yes you do.

Why the fuck should women be allowed to touch money at some point in the tax paying process.

It’s ridiculous.

The reason everyone hates the IRS is because women work there.

Women are vindictive cows when it comes to taking things. That’s part of the reason they can’t stop shopping. Each purchasing conquest a woman makes lets her imagine she’s ripping it out of the grubby hands of a female comrade. It’s a bloodlust. Women don’t get enjoyment from gaining or having things. They only get enjoyment from taking them. Divorces. That’s a great example. Well another one is as a tax auditor.

A tax revenue auditor isn’t looking for twenty bucks that you got paid for helping a neighbor put up a fence and didn’t report. They’re looking to see if you have a boat in the Bahamas called Fuck Taxes or if you filed 40 different returns under 40 different tax IDs. Trust me. I’ve owned a few businesses and that’s what jackasses try to pull — they’re mostly women.

Rooting around through your personal shit for a missing twenty here and there — maybe a small Christmas bonus that flew under the radar — that’s womanly behavior and womanly horseshit. It doesn’t belong in the government.

The bottom line is women should be kept so far out of the government that they don’t even know what one is.

We’re halfway there.

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4 Comments in 4 threads.»

Comment by Chris
2008-07-04 17:11:43 - IP Man-Hash: c4197a66f066c

My favorite H & R Block story happened a long time ago. I got my return done and walked up to the counter and the lady says to me, “That’ll be $35.” So I open my wallet and pull out a 50 and a 5. The lady looks at me funny and says, “What’s the $5 bill for?” I said to her, “umm..55-35=$20. HELLO, you people are supposed to be the accountants here.” Every guy in that office busted up laughing and I got the most hate filled stare ever given to me to this day.

 
Comment by wolfe
2006-02-03 10:27:25 - IP Man-Hash: 76cebfba7c181

Why not take that to our forums in the Politik section? I for one look forward to discussing it there.
-wolfe

 
Comment by Alan the WindJammer
2006-02-03 08:37:56 - IP Man-Hash: 281c250662a27

Dick,
Since you are speaking about the “Infernally Ridiculous Shitheads”, I assume you are from the states. I was wondering about your views on tax reform. I happen to believe that a flat tax for everyone with no deductions would generate more revenue and would not unfairly burden one class of people with exorbitant taxes. For the sake of the board, I won’t expand on that with all the numbers and theories. I thought it might be a good discussion for a forum, and wanted get your and the others’ interest levels.

 
Comment by Dan
2006-02-01 18:31:22 - IP Man-Hash: 25da4bb864872

This reminds me of something I was thinking about the other day after having one of the best checkout experiences of my life. I know what you’re saying, “An amazing checkout experience? You need to get out more.” But it was so fast and friendly and professional I actually looked at my surroundings to see if I could figure out what set this guy apart from the rest, and then it it me. Right in front of my face, this GUY! 95% of the people checking people out were women. No wonder most of the time paying for my shit is like pulling teeth. It’s because people like this guy, men, move up in the company, while the women continue to be register jockeys – playing with their hair, talking to their friends while checking you out, and generally not giving a fuck about the quality of their work or the customer.

 

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