Women Caused the War in Iraq

Women caused the war in Iraq. It’s been plain as day to me for a while now — because of my mantuition, but I didn’t want to drop that particular bomb up the ass of feminism because I hadn’t yet acquired the proof.

Someone call the CO. The proof has been acquired.

Just like all other wars, women caused the war in Iraq.

Whatever your thoughts on the war in Iraq, there is one thing that can’t be argued: more than 3,000 US troops have lost their lives in battle. That means if every man who has given his life for freedom in Iraq was an M&M, the deaths of those men would probably fill up a fish bowl. I’m not sure about that because I’m not very good at those guessing games. I’m a man. I’m not about fucking guessing, I’m about facts.

Here’s a fact for you. Since 1960, women and their fat asses have gotten fatter by a magnitude of 24 pounds. That’s 17% more Cushion for the Pushin, making women that much more sensual than they were a mere 50 years ago.

But Dick, what does massive and disgusting weight gain have to do with the war in the middle east?

I’ll tell you, my man friend.

The troops in Iraq have been doing more than building freedom and democracy in these unstable parts of the world. They’ve also been acquiring access to oil faster than women at a Midnight Madness sale acquired fucking claw marks all over her arms. Unlike women, the military does it with class — except the woman parts of the military. They do it with no class.

It doesn’t matter if you think oil is why anyone went to Iraq in the first place. The free world is getting its precious oil regardless of intent. It’s like slapping the shit out of a woman. Even if you didn’t mean to, she’s still going to get turned on by it. If you don’t think that’s true, find me one woman over the age of 17 who hasn’t had a rape fantasy.

Twenty four more pounds of womanly personality equals 469 million more gallons of gasoline per year purchased by the average male just to schlep his prize pig to the movies and back; probably stopping at Starbucks or Coldstone Ice Creamery on the way to and back. Starting to see the big picture?

Maybe if women could skip a meal or hit the treadmill more often than twice every New Years, we wouldn’t be so fucking dependent on oil. We would be exactly 469 million gallons less dependent on oil. I wonder how many of those 3,000 marines that would have saved.

I wonder that, but women don’t. They just keep cramming donuts and bear claws into their gaping maws like no one’s making any more, and somehow they manage to fill their air with their braying and jaw-jacking while doing so. It makes me sick.

If all the reasons women shouldn’t be in the army were M&M’s, you could probably stack them up into space. Jessica Lynch and Lynndie England would be a big fat pair of M&M’s the size of footballs at the very bottom; those ones they sell during Easter.

Man, are those two broads a pair of military grade fuck ups or what?

Women Weigh In. Moo.

Related Articles:

RSS feed | Trackback URI

214 Comments in 207 threads.»

Pages: [11] 10 9 8 7 6 5 4 3 2 1 » Show All

Comment by people like you make me sick
2008-11-29 23:14:14 - IP Man-Hash: f0fc65bbde4d8

next thing your going to say is that Hitler was a women who disguised herself as a man.

THEY ARE ALIENS WHO HAVE COME TO STEAL MENS SOULS!!!!

(i am a women yes)

Comment by RB
2008-11-29 23:15:51 - IP Man-Hash: 7b02518d4f6e8

“i am a women”

-Women like YOU make me sick.

Comment by people like you make me sick
2008-11-29 23:43:19 - IP Man-Hash: f0fc65bbde4d8

yes probably :)

Comment by studioline
2008-11-30 04:19:23 - IP Man-Hash: 9ef6bbdbd8e2c

Why don’t you go and jerk yourself off instead.

(Comments won't nest below this level)
 
 
 
 
Comment by irgirlfromtehinternets
2008-10-11 07:40:20 - IP Man-Hash: 4951299e78656

OMFG THIS IS HILARIOUS. Everyone here is making me laugh. Keep going you bags of flesh, your squabbling is amusing.

Dick <– LOL.

Comment by psiros
2008-10-11 07:51:41 - IP Man-Hash: b2b51383cd182

Do these cows not read any other posts before posting? I would guess not. Men post witty things on there that make everyone laugh, and maybe even shit a little. Women may as well copy-and-paste the same goddamn post each time since all they can do is spill the diarrhea in their heads into the text box.

I’d even go so far as to say I wouldn’t find women’s hate speech on here so offensive if just one single fucking slit could be amusing, witty, whatever.

Tip: When you cunts posts, think to yourself, “How will someone respond to this?” Now, this is a stretch because, as any man can demonstrate from any conversation with a woman, women never consider anything but their immediate desires and sexual gratitification. But at least make an effort to contribute to the entertainment factor.

Or don’t. Just fuck off this site since women are not allowed on here.

 
 
Comment by betterthanmen
2008-08-18 16:12:25 - IP Man-Hash: 745ec88b7fb8e

You’re a sorry-ass. Get yourself checked.

Comment by studioline
2008-10-11 11:11:36 - IP Man-Hash: 90b4d318ff818

Very profound comment, wow,

Now check your asshole

 
 
Comment by Manly Man
2008-04-27 09:08:50 - IP Man-Hash: f6fd904ed8e66

Ritsuka-chan said:

I think it’s funny that you resort to an insult after she totally turns your arguement around on you, and reveals that you twisted a fact for your article.

I think it’s funny that you named yourself Ritsuka Chan. I bet you’re not even japanese are you, you mask wearing, cock hungry vampire? You otakus make me sick. Go watch some DBZ while you rub acne medication on your undoubtedly pock-marked face.

Comment by people like you make me sick
2008-11-29 23:29:28 - IP Man-Hash: f0fc65bbde4d8

that was uncalled for, really….

just because of the name she chose doesn’t mean you have to go burn her like a cigarette bud. this isn’t about the name people choose.

 
 
Comment by Manly Man
2008-04-27 09:08:22 - IP Man-Hash: f6fd904ed8e66

Ritsuka-chan said:

I think it’s funny that you resort to an insult after she totally turns your arguement around on you, and reveals that you twisted a fact for your article.

I think it’s funny that you named yourself Ritsuka Chan. I bet you’re not een japanese are you, you mask wearing, cock hungry vampire? You otakus make me sick. Go watch some DBZ while you rub acne medication on your undoubtedly pock-marked face.

 
Comment by emcee murdah
2008-04-24 16:14:33 - IP Man-Hash: 2ef9c272471b5

King Wang said:

No, women DID cause the war in Iraq. Here, let me explain with Man-Logic, all of it true and fact:

Had women had more sex with men than talking so fucking much (yes, I know, a Quantum Singularity) then no men would have WANTED to go overseas to kill people………

See? Pure logic, every man here knows it is true, every woman wishes it were not.

There are, in fact, alternatives to talking, which is shutting the fuck up.

yo dude, that makes absolutely no sense, because i would much rather whack off and put up with no sex than going overseas to smash the heads in of a bunch of wankers who I have never met, and have virtually no reason to bother.

i think all of you need to smoke some dope, turn up the bob marley
and feel the love.

 
Comment by Ritsuka-chan
2008-04-10 18:20:39 - IP Man-Hash: 0ccfb0180d42a

I think it’s funny that you resort to an insult after she totally turns your arguement around on you, and reveals that you twisted a fact for your article.

 
Comment by Ritsuka-chan
2008-04-10 18:17:26 - IP Man-Hash: 0ccfb0180d42a

Dick Masterson said:

Laura said:

Besides, if men are better and more intelligent than women, why are they so easily manipulated by women? Especially going to war and getting killed, just for women.
Wouldn’t that denote a certain lack of intelligence?

Laura, did you get some sand in your vagina?

-Dick

Comment by Passing by...
2008-09-08 18:05:42 - IP Man-Hash: 5b15435bdabaf

It’s easy: women are so useless that they have to suck men’s blood to survive. They have evolved in that way, if that can be called evolve. So they see, for example, men like sex, and they think “let’s be whores to make them pay our sex favours by working for us”. They also manipulate men because of man’s chivalry, man’s protection instinct, man’s father instinct, etc.
That’s the proof why men are more inteligent than women: women are so dumb that they have to use men’s intelligence to survive.

 
 
Comment by sean
2008-04-09 22:07:05 - IP Man-Hash: 6db9d5da2589a

Some of this stuff is admittedly funny, but anybody who seriously agrees with the guy is not only an idiot, but a shame to guys everywhere. Get over yourselves.

 
Comment by Commander Scott
2008-04-07 23:45:34 - IP Man-Hash: 3e8d1e2b2a4c4

kuntvomit said:

i dont luv u anymore cuz u like niggers

Every single woman on the surface of the planet is a fascist, neo-Nazi cunt who is only psychologically attracted to street toughs and the independently wealthy. The above quoted piece of text simply indicates that all women are racist bigots with insufferably strong xenophobic and ethnocentric tendencies. Additionally, contemporary scientific research has actually confirmed that Negro, Hispanic and Anglo-Saxon females are the most prejudiced amongst the entire female population demographic.

The conventional wisdom of male patriarchy has always maintained that between both genders, the female is the more bigoted and intolerant of the two; modern research, such as that conducted by John Tierney on racial preferences in dating behaviour, simply confirms this.

Consistent with this line of reasoning, on an historical level, the great mixed populations (mestizos and mulattoes) of Latin America were the result of the Spanish and Portuguese conquistadors of the sixteenth century. Only men could produce such widespread polygamous bonds, given the fact that male social behaviour is oriented towards the broader population, whereas that of the female, due to its greater association with the maternal instinct and reproductive biology, is geared towards the formation of dyadic relationships with small numbers of social intimates. Moreover, the offspring of such adulterous unions initiated by Iberian men to be with Native women were often sent by these very same men to be both educated and civilized in Madrid or Lisbon during the Golden Age of Piracy. Surely this is a glowing tribute to the greater tolerance and cosmopolitanism of the male!

And what has any woman ever done? Nothing! In fact, it is the female hatred of others that ultimately brought about racial segregation in America and the Holocaust in Nazi Germany; it was through the combined effort of great masses of women, who actively supported and even voted for these thugs in record numbers, that the former slave-owners achieved power after Reconstruction in the late 1870s or that the Nazi party achieved power in 1933.

In short, all women, particularly Yankee, Canuck, English, and Aussie women, deserve to have their faces busted in with baseball bats.

It’s a beautiful day out; I hope I don’t run into any Yankee, Canadian or English whores along the way; it would certainly spoil a most pleasant jaunt to the local convenience store that I am soon planning to take. I would end up having to do a basket full of laundry soaked in menstrual blood at the end of the day.

 
Comment by kuntvomit
2008-04-07 22:12:10 - IP Man-Hash: e6ba0505713d8

i dont luv u anymore cuz u like niggers

 
Comment by kuntvomit
2008-04-07 19:07:55 - IP Man-Hash: e6ba0505713d8

hah women caused the war cause their fat…..makes perfect sense.. your mustash is neat.. i luv u..i wish u would slap me

 
Comment by andywattbulb
2008-04-07 07:11:06 - IP Man-Hash: daf566e7d8c07

woman cause hair to grow on your hands too!

 
Comment by bob
2008-04-02 12:53:59 - IP Man-Hash: aeabf63e0c333

your a fucking idiot and u seriously need to go jump off a building =] have a great day asshooooollllleeeeeeeeeeeee

 
Comment by detached
2008-01-31 06:37:14 - IP Man-Hash: d4bccff602147

April Glasby, also a woman and stupidly appointed as ambassador to Irag prior to gulf war 1, stupidly told Saddam that the US doesn’t care about border disputes between Kuwait and Iraq.

She was probably just trying to speed up the meeting so she could get her latte and nails done that morning.

 
Comment by son of the suns
2008-01-31 05:17:46 - IP Man-Hash: 6ec6c2ab6784a

That should be Iraqi loans OWED to Kuwait.

 
Comment by son of the suns
2008-01-31 05:17:09 - IP Man-Hash: 6ec6c2ab6784a

Wrong.

The issue was Iraqi loans to Kuwait and whether they could be removed or altered.

The Kuwait diplomat said “No, and I won’t be happy until every Iraqi woman is a $10 whore.”

 
Comment by brian
2008-01-31 02:27:31 - IP Man-Hash: 43c0cec7de800

An article in the Omaha World Herald had an interesting story about Suddam Hussein. He invaded kuwait because the diplomat from there called the women of Iraq whores. So in aroundabout way, women did cause both Iraq wars.

 
Comment by Doubt
2008-01-26 10:49:12 - IP Man-Hash: 4b8494f25ae28

KL said:

No. women didnt cause the war. Men did. Men have been doing that for ages. They are like lower sub human people. They’re animals.

For some odd reason, my posts seem to be diverted away by this little girly-girl. Don’t worry, my examination applies equally to this stock whore as well.
Why in the hell would you post so often and say so little? Do you feel like you’re ‘entitled’ to be given a free idiot pass in every nook and alley you stumble into?
And what in the fuck is this?

KL said:

Most stupid article i’ve ever read.

You do know that you are just spamming up the forums like any other stupid, interchangeable American whore - and then you scream in horror when people get fed up with your bullshit and move overseas. Disgusting, used up, ungrateful parasite. It really is ridiculous that you fail to see such blindingly obvious FACTS. Not opinions, little bitch, FACTS. We differ on our political views, but this is like the fact that the earth is round - you can’t make a logical argument against it. I mean, I know that you think you know a lot - you’re basically too stupid or too self-obsessed to step back and see how mediocre you are - but really, you can’t see how absurd it is for some platform-sandal-wearing 17-year-old schoolgirl to talk about manhood and masculinity as though she knows shit about anything outside of her sheltered existence?
You aren’t funny. You don’t ‘rib’ people, you just piss them off with your lame, overused small dick jokes. You notice how your audience isn’t cheering for you? There are many different people here from many different backgrounds, and even differing political views. However, we share the fact that we are well-educated in our opinions - hence the only way you, in your ignorance, know to counter them is to devolve a logical argument into a series of childish insults. You then proceed to contradict yourself by attacking our maturity and once again using ignorance as an excuse for cruelty.
Do you notice how no one seems to learn anything about themselves from your own emotional beliefs about them, and yet they seem to learn so much about you? According to you, I am homosexual, I am homosexual because I feel that society treats homosexual men better than straight men, have small genitalia, wish I was a girl to the same extent that you wish you were a man, I am mentally inferior to you, and have never had any positive sexual experience whatsoever in a single day of my life.
You do not devote a single sentence of explanation to back up those claims. However, I know that you sound just like the other stupid whores who pester us on our site. You are emotional, vacant, and impatient. When I say you are emotional, I mean that you rarely use logic in your thinking but rather use the same type of egotistical viewpoint a three-year-old uses. You are also self-obsessed and boastful, both flaws of the character. You frequently flaunt your self-proclaimed superiority and achievements as backing for your illogical personal attacks.
Of course, those are just a few of the observations about you. Pretty much, you have every negative personality trait I can think of at the moment. You have probably suggested suicide to someone not as a joke, but rather as just a vacant uttering of your own selfishness. I mean, if you don’t like one thing about him, what right does he have to live? However, you undoubtedly frequently threaten personal bodily harm to those who can not help but to unconditionally love you in one form or another. Perhaps through your promiscuity, the vacant, attention-whoring way you dress, or your excessive compensation of your body and the current social privileges allowed for short, effeminate little girly-girls for actual wit and talent. You also undoubtedly find your sexual habits define very much about who you are. If you are a virgin, your stress it indefinitely, as though not putting out after being paid to do so somehow makes you superior in mind and body than a girl who upholds her promise. If you dress like you want to be fucked, you’d better be planning on getting fucked tonight. Otherwise, you’re just teasing and manipulating men who, through social conditioning, have been taught to believe that some ungrateful whore like you is all they have to settle for.
And then you bitches complain about men stalking you. Really… and is the whole ‘convince men that they are already rapists’ mentality working out so well for you little girls? I mean, if we’re already damned beyond salvation, then we’ll most certainly straighten our act out. Typical feminist brilliance at its shittiest.

 
Comment by KL
2008-01-26 10:36:28 - IP Man-Hash: 704442c4e98b2

Same to you ”bitch”

 
Name (required)
E-mail (required - never shown publicly)
URI

Close
E-mail It
Powered by ShareThis