Public Sperking…I Mean Speaking

I can count the number of great women public speakers throughout history on one hand. Zero.

Women make lousy public speakers. They can’t engage an audience and they certainly can’t keep the attention of an audience for longer than a few minutes without relying on some kind of charlatan, amateur sexual provocation. That much is no secret.

What is worth discussing is just how much better than women men are when it comes to being eloquent with the mouth — lots better.

To begin any public address, a man will start with a joke to warm up the audience. This device has worked brilliantly for millennia of oration; from Homer to Hitler. Right off the top, this is completely out for women. Women can’t be funny, so instead of a joke, you get a completely flummoxed pseudo-expert in a skirt babbling on about statistics or milestones or other nonsense straight out of the gate. That’s exactly what a crowd of people wants to do before they’ve finished their first cup of coffee: math.

Another reason why men are so good and so much better than women at speaking is that they know what they’re talking about. Men know quite a bit about a lot of things. We’re renaissance men after all — all of us in our own way are renaissance men. But before climbing onto a stage to discourse on a topic, men perform additional and extensive research on it. We just don’t like to embarrass ourselves by getting caught with our pants around our ankles and our lack of facts hanging out for everyone to see. That’s not a man’s style.

Women on the other hand, most likely got into their position as “expert” through some hiring quota or affirmative action mandate. Who knows what it was, we all know what it wasn’t: being an expert. And while these mandates and diversity quotas are essential to the “gender equality” movement, they are pure poison to the art of public speaking.

Most importantly, however, is that men will stand up and be counted for what they’re saying. They’ll put it all on the line if what they think they’re saying is true — and for that reason it might as well be. Women have never had the courage to do this. As soon as someone starts tossing heads of lettuce and tomatoes at them for speaking their minds, they throw up facts and datums like popcorn at attacking seagulls and dive behind the podium for cover. Did Thomas Paine or Guy Fawkes ever pull that kind of shit? Certainly no, they did not.

I don’t even want to get into how clumsily women throw their sentences together. All I will say is that if the human brain spontaneously combusted if the word ‘basically’ was said more than like a hundred times during a half hour stretch, women wouldn’t even be allowed to open their mouths in public anymore. A chimp with a Speak and Spell strapped to its back could throw thoughts that stuck to the wall in a more cohesive pattern.