Yoga Is For Sluts
In my second installment of Dick’s Week of Honorary Men, I would like to honor Kristina Kireeva. As you can tell by her first name, she’s a woman, and that makes her the MenAreBetterThanWomen.com Honorary Man of the Month for October. Good work Miss October.
You can follow the links at the bottom of this article (and I highly recommend you do), but I will sum it up for you here. That’s part of the reason men are so good at everything by the way. If one man does the work, that man shares it with other men. Women keep secrets like they’re poisonous.
Like everything I say about women, I didn’t know how brilliant that was until I proof read it — which as a man I never do.
Kristina Kireeva is a human sex toy — or human pretzel. I don’t know which is more accurate. While the videos I link to range from erotic to horrifying, the message is clear: women doing yoga has fucking nothing to do with health and fitness.
That is a myth.
Women all over the civilized globe are ga-ga for Yoga. In fact, some are calling it the “Babies of the 21st century”. Feel free to use that, it’s actually only myself who’s calling it that thus far. My point is: women couldn’t care fucking less about health and fitness. They’re just as lazy and gold-bricking as they ever have been. Women, however, are obsessed with sex.
When dealing with women, it’s important to remember rule #1: Everything women do is meant to attract men. Women who are into yoga are just women who are really, really into sex and want all men at the gym to know about it. They also want any men who get in their car to know about it. That’s why they leave those rubber stinking mats in their backseat until they can’t fucking smell anymore.
These women think about sex all day most likely. I don’t know. I try not to spend a lot of time pontificating on how women think. There was some Twilight Zone episode about that one time. I believe some kind of alien trash was left somewhere and all sorts of brilliant men minds wasted thousands of collective hours ruminating on what amounted to shit. That’s the same thing.
If that wasn’t an actual Twilight Zone, it doesn’t matter because it obviously should have been. Use your man-magination.
Kristina “The Human Sex Toy” Kireeva is a woman obsessed with yoga. I’m honoring her this month with my most prestigious award because of her work to expose yoga as the kinky and delectable woman-hobby that it is. After all, why else would she post — nay, film in the first place, a video of herself in sexually suggesting and compromising “yoga” positions? There can be no other reason; except perhaps in some kind of dimension where outrageous things such as that are the norm.
This is reality though, and the Smurfs are not fucking real.
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November 21st, 2007 at 4:42 am - IP Man-Hash: eeb32e3dc6874
It says it will be the only time in our lives we’ll see an adult woman in shape.
November 21st, 2007 at 4:52 am - IP Man-Hash: eeb32e3dc6874
Yashita no one wants to read up on yoga. It’s lame so take it back and shut the fuck up.
December 28th, 2007 at 8:03 pm - IP Man-Hash: e8aef83e7def5
Well, while I appreciate the sentiment of the article, the woman in the video was not doing yoga. Yoga (well, real yoga) is practiced by plenty of men and there is nothing un-manly about real yoga. It takes a lot of stength, control, balance, and dedication.
As a side note, I’m glad to see there are a few men left that were not rendered ball-less and impotent from feminism. Keep up the good work.
January 5th, 2008 at 3:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: 788f5d4ba44cb
Convincing as this argument is, it is essential to look to the origins of yoga. Yoga, both as a philosophy and as “exercise”, predates both Hinduism and Buddhism. Knowledge of Yoga was originally passed on from teacher (guru) to student. Here’s where your very generalized “yoga is for sluts” argument falls apart. Gurus and students were always male. Women were by custom (maybe even by religious edict) precluded from studying anything, Yogic philosophy in particular.
Because yoga was never intended for women to practice, it cannot be argued that yoga is for women. It’s for men. Always has been. It’s probably more accurate to say that the “westernized”/”modern” women who go to yoga classes these days are sluts. Oh, and self-satisfied. I’m an Indian woman, and I attended a yoga class with a friend once. The instructor finished up the class by bringing her hands together and greeting us “Namaste.” I wanted to punch her.
January 5th, 2008 at 5:55 pm - IP Man-Hash: 55548152be297
How ‘Enlightening’
-Sgt. Reyes
January 5th, 2008 at 6:23 pm - IP Man-Hash: 720a12647a390
I wonder if the reason for your anger was at her affront of your historical culture (especially so if the greeting was targeted as yourself and your friend and as a result perhaps somehow inappropriate or even racist), or if rather your desire to “punch her” stemmed from the fact she had a self-satisfied “look how clever I am for knowing a Sanskrit greeting, this is what makes me Guru and therefore qualified enough after reading a book to take your money” glow of smugness about her, heheh.
I must say though, yoga, pilates (one of my favourites owing to the abdominal core strength a lass gains from practising this), gymnastics (another personal favourite, think body-shape), contortionism, or anything of the sort, is vastly more rewarding to a man whose gf/spouse indulges in the activity rather than simply hitting the treadmill. Don’t discourage behaviour from which you gain profit. Unless of course you prefer coming home to a fat pig with biscuit crumbs on her sweatshirt cleavage. To each their own.
January 5th, 2008 at 6:37 pm - IP Man-Hash: 55548152be297
Exactly. Well put Sir!
- Sgt. Reyes
January 6th, 2008 at 8:47 pm - IP Man-Hash: 788f5d4ba44cb
All of the above haha
March 30th, 2008 at 11:46 am - IP Man-Hash: 9fafca6625256
Yoga started when Lord Krishna visited a whorehouse and wanted to try something new. He taught the strumpets various contortions that induced uncontrollable sexual craving. He called these women “Yogini” which is Sanskrit for “little sluts”. So yes Dick you are right, these women to spend all their time thinking about sex but it is a RESULT of the yoga. So if you aren’t getting anywhere with a woman take her to a yoga class and she will be on her knees begging you for sex in the parking lot. But why bother? Just go to a yoga class and take your pick.
March 30th, 2008 at 12:44 pm - IP Man-Hash: b5f04cb5a5c8d
I am beyond horrified. I am certain I am not the first to ask but surely you boys are aware of the vast number of women in politics, science, medicine, philosophy, etc. or are your heads so far up your asses that you can’t see that?
By the way, I am a liberal feminist that is hot, loves sex, owns 3 handguns and drives a 6spd. corvette. Blow me.
March 30th, 2008 at 2:25 pm - IP Man-Hash: 60b9632657c7c
Honey, you wish we could. That’s the whole point.
-Dick
March 30th, 2008 at 5:48 pm - IP Man-Hash: 3e8d1e2b2a4c4
The only reason why women have been allowed to participate in fields such as politics, science, medicine, and philosophy is because of such programs as affirmative action which are ideologically grounded in political correctness and Marxist sociological analysis. Expressed differently, it could be said that women are mental troglodytes who desire an extended series of hand outs rather than a single hand up; because women are obviously intellectually inferior to men they are unable to enter the professions on the basis of their own personal merit.
On the other hand, men have always traditionally dominated such fields as science and medicine because men have significantly higher levels of intelligence than the lesser evolved human female.
Wouldn’t the world be a much better place if no sexual revolution had ever taken place and women just stayed in the kitchen where they belong?
March 30th, 2008 at 8:05 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9fafca6625256
Chill out, Aynne. I do yoga myself, but I always put my mat in the front of the room so that I need not look upon the sluts who are present. It is, I admit, often difficult to fend off the sex-crazed whores who claw at me after practice begging me to satisfy their hot lusts, but it’s my cross to bear.
By the way, real men prefer rifles to handguns, and the more powerful the rifle, the better. Are your handguns the Lady Smith model with the pink rubber grips?
April 6th, 2008 at 10:04 am - IP Man-Hash: 44ac3eaea4e54
I LOVE THIS SITE, i needed a good laugh and here it is. i love it when idiots think they are superior than someone else, its like crack to me. Im assuming you guys are all fuckin gay due to the fact women are so low to you, or its just because you havent been layed in years! hope when your world comes crashing down itl be on the news
nick
April 6th, 2008 at 11:26 pm - IP Man-Hash: 105b9136f157d
So thats why old men from India do yoga, because their sluts. Makes perfect sense uh, yeah.
April 8th, 2008 at 12:32 am - IP Man-Hash: d5e2c98e696c9
Poop!
April 13th, 2008 at 2:51 pm - IP Man-Hash: af3eab157b8a1
I love social intercourse.
April 13th, 2008 at 2:57 pm - IP Man-Hash: af3eab157b8a1
Y?
April 13th, 2008 at 3:02 pm - IP Man-Hash: af3eab157b8a1
itakethatback
April 17th, 2008 at 6:51 pm - IP Man-Hash: 0db531e5b687a
What does the fact that you just said “yous” say about you?