Yoga Is For Sluts

In my second installment of Dick’s Week of Honorary Men, I would like to honor Kristina Kireeva. As you can tell by her first name, she’s a woman, and that makes her the MenAreBetterThanWomen.com Honorary Man of the Month for October. Good work Miss October.

You can follow the links at the bottom of this article (and I highly recommend you do), but I will sum it up for you here. That’s part of the reason men are so good at everything by the way. If one man does the work, that man shares it with other men. Women keep secrets like they’re poisonous.

Like everything I say about women, I didn’t know how brilliant that was until I proof read it — which as a man I never do.

Kristina Kireeva is a human sex toy — or human pretzel. I don’t know which is more accurate. While the videos I link to range from erotic to horrifying, the message is clear: women doing yoga has fucking nothing to do with health and fitness.

That is a myth.

Women all over the civilized globe are ga-ga for Yoga. In fact, some are calling it the “Babies of the 21st century”. Feel free to use that, it’s actually only myself who’s calling it that thus far. My point is: women couldn’t care fucking less about health and fitness. They’re just as lazy and gold-bricking as they ever have been. Women, however, are obsessed with sex.

When dealing with women, it’s important to remember rule #1: Everything women do is meant to attract men. Women who are into yoga are just women who are really, really into sex and want all men at the gym to know about it. They also want any men who get in their car to know about it. That’s why they leave those rubber stinking mats in their backseat until they can’t fucking smell anymore.

These women think about sex all day most likely. I don’t know. I try not to spend a lot of time pontificating on how women think. There was some Twilight Zone episode about that one time. I believe some kind of alien trash was left somewhere and all sorts of brilliant men minds wasted thousands of collective hours ruminating on what amounted to shit. That’s the same thing.

If that wasn’t an actual Twilight Zone, it doesn’t matter because it obviously should have been. Use your man-magination.

Kristina “The Human Sex Toy” Kireeva is a woman obsessed with yoga. I’m honoring her this month with my most prestigious award because of her work to expose yoga as the kinky and delectable woman-hobby that it is. After all, why else would she post — nay, film in the first place, a video of herself in sexually suggesting and compromising “yoga” positions? There can be no other reason; except perhaps in some kind of dimension where outrageous things such as that are the norm.

This is reality though, and the Smurfs are not fucking real.

Yoga is for Women

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108 Comments in 108 threads.»

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Comment by hotdude111
2006-09-22 08:29:44

Absolutely ground-breaking exposure of horny women faking physical Education! Way to go, Dick……………..u da man!!

 
Comment by Dick Masterson
2006-09-21 17:06:38

wolfe said:

Which of course instantly invalidates one of the primary features [for many men] of that particular sexual position.
-wolfe

That was funny.

-Dick

 
Comment by gwallan
2006-09-21 08:06:04

Dakota Smith said:

Huh. The position at 00:34 in the video can only have one meaning:

“Hey, boys, check this out! You can do me doggy-style and still look me directly in the eyes!

I’m reminded of Roy and HG’s commentary at the gymnastics during the Sydney Olympics.
The expressions “cop that” and “look at me” were regulars and are apt for Kristina in spades.

 
Comment by sonyad
2006-09-21 07:12:55

A few moments there I could swear pop went the beaver. She’d have a bright career as a drive belt, I’ll say that much.

 
Comment by Sir_Chancealot
2006-09-21 06:38:24

Can you say “attention whore”? Good, I knew you could do it!

I agree that’s almost like soft-core porn. It even includes the cheesy porn-music. You know, if it was a man doing that, he’d say “You stretch this way for this benefit, and you stretch this other way for this other benefit.”. Not so with this broad. She’s all like “Look at me, look how sexual I am.” Not even a smile, like she’s enjoying it.

 
Comment by wolfe
2006-09-21 01:38:08

Dakota Smith said:
“Hey, boys, check this out! You can do me doggy-style and still look me directly in the eyes!

Which of course instantly invalidates one of the primary features [for many men] of that particular sexual position.
-wolfe

 
Comment by diamatik
2006-09-21 01:13:49

I thought a similar thing (albeit, my thoughts were more along the lines of the easy transition of my member from her muff to her mouth and more). That video was like some wierd form of softcore porn to me.

 
Comment by Dakota Smith
2006-09-20 22:27:14

Huh. The position at 00:34 in the video can only have one meaning:

“Hey, boys, check this out! You can do me doggy-style and still look me directly in the eyes!

 
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