The following question was sent to me by Marco Urso.

Thousands of years of research, thinking, and inventing from men all over the globe were put on display that day to boldly go where no man has gone before (and within the scheduled time frame).

I am talking of course about the Apollo 11 Mission and I wondered exactly how manly was the first manned flight to the moon?

I don’t know if all of you men know this, but no women were involved in the planning or execution of the Apollo 11 mission to the moon.

Here’s a short list of other amazing projects no women were involved in:

All of them. [Read more]

Necroswordsman of decayingsword.mabtw.com has sent me the following question.

Hey Dick, I have a question. In most of my life I have wondered how feminists have affected the media. For example, nowadays, a children’s presenter has to be clearly a young guy or they’re branded a pedophile. You get what I mean.

I’d really like some answers.

And I’d really like those barking-dog shock-collars to become the hottest women’s fashion item for 2007. Imagine what a utopia that would be. Every time a woman went to open her mouth, she’d get an electric Five Across the Eyes.

Women are too terrified during a crisis to say anything anyway. What’s the downside? At least this way they’d have an excuse. A sexy excuse. [Read more]

The following question was sent to me by a reader Erik.

Here in America prostitution is illegal, yet pornography is completely okay so long as all participants are eighteen and over. This is what confuses me: Is pornography (that is to say, intercourse between two parties) not the same as prostitution?

Why is prostitution illegal?

Good question, Erik. Now prepare your mind for a mantomic explosion of answer.

Prostitution is illegal because women hate the fuck out of each other. [Read more]

After seeing The 300 again, I’ve decided on what I find to be manliest feature of this film.

Anything a man needs to decide can be done in a maximum of five days. Men are better at deciding than women and I’ve just demonstrated this — with gusto. Women will spend six, ten, sometimes they spend their entire fucking lives deciding on the easiest of shit. And worse yet, after they’ve decided and done it, they’ll spend their entire lives re-deciding!

Then they’ll protest in front of abortion clinics. How silly.

The manliest part of The 300 is that the movie gives women a chance to shine. [Read more]

I was watching The 300 again last night and I realized something.

Boy was I right when I said The 300 is the most important movie any man will ever see in his life. In fact, I didn’t even know how right I was.

That happens to me all the time. [Read more]

If you haven’t seen this movie called The 300, then you need to do it immediately. As a man, it might be the most important film you ever see.

The message of The 300 is clear from the first ten seconds — ten seconds that don’t fuck around at all even for one of those seconds.

Are you a man? Awesome. Are you a woman? Fuck you.

Men are better than women. [Read more]

diamatik has sent me the following question:

Dick, why do women hate porn?

Oh boy do they ever. And what’s worse than a woman who hates porn? A woman who loves porn. That’s a man-bear trap set loose in the conjugal bedroom that you just can’t miss!

“You know what would be exciting? We should watch some porn.�?

“Really?�?

Guilty! Not if you want to have sex you shouldn’t! Women hate porn because men are better than women. [Read more]

A few days ago, I was struck with a chilly sensation that went directly from my balls to my brain. That sensation is called a manpiphany, and as a man I get these manpiphanies all the time. It’s like menopausal women and hot flashes. The only difference is someone still wants to fuck me.

Within a manpiphany is a universe of thought and invention. Manpiphanies are why men are closer than women to God. One day, I invented both fire and the wheel in separate manpiphanies. I doubled my Man Points. Lucky for me, some man had already invented them both several thousand years ago. I had lots of other shit to do and getting that job done myself would have been a caveman-sized pain in my ass.

My latest manpiphany told me that men are better than women at being coaches. Sports coaches, life coaches, coach drivers; you name it, if you can stick ‘coach’ in it, men are better than women. [Read more]