Dress For Failure Doesn’t Rhyme

Have you ever heard a woman talk about a man wearing a suit? Good Lord, it’s disgusting. Whenever my man-sense (which is a lot like common sense except hundreds of times more powerful) tells me that the topic is a-brewin, I immediately reach for a pair of galoshes because all of the nearby women are about to commence drooling like savages.

It makes one wonder, if women are so obsessed with how men dress, why do all women dress like complete shit?

Walk down the street and see how many men have dressed poorly for the day. You might find a few teenage men who haven’t quite gotten it figured out yet, but otherwise, you’ll see nothing but impeccable class. You’ll see men wearing business suits and smart-looking blazers maybe; both of which are appropriate for where a man spends most of this day: the workplace. Even the men you see who yield freely and of their own accord to the desire for sustenance, will disguise their bulk like a great and powerful chameleon, by donning the occasional Hawaiian shirt or other ingenuous piece of flair.

This is an art that men have been practicing for thousands of years. Not to impress women, but because men have class. If all we wanted to do was impress women, then we would just walk around naked all the time. That would obviously work. Why do you think women revert to fifth grade giggling over a man wearing a neck tie? I’ll give you a hint. It rhymes with, and also is: the penis.

If I was some kind of alien being and I had to estimate how long women have been dressing themselves based on their appearance on my first visit to Earth, I would have to guess about a week.

First of all, no woman has ever disguised anything about her appearance. They think that everything pertaining to them and who they are is great and brilliant — no matter how disgusting or how much of it there is; and that it should be shoved right in everyone’s face. This is true in absolutely every instance.

Secondly, we all know that the easiest and fastest way possible to get attention is by making a completely catastrophe of yourself.

QED.

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57 Comments in 57 threads.»

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Comment by Nicole
2005-06-16 15:24:18

You know I once heard that people like each other for their qualities but love each other for their faults. That is so true, all the cute little ‘annoying’ things people do are what make them different to everyone else, if no one had flaws then we would all be the same.

I feel pity for the men on this website because you have never loved a woman, and that is the best feeling in the world. Dick, if you are ever in love then you will be capable of not only accepting a woman’s flaws but loving her for them, and her loving you for yours. Then perhaps you will understand, that yes women have flaws (we are only human after all) but we have no more faults than men. Perhaps if you can learn to accept one woman, you will be able to accept us all.

By the way sorry for coming on this website even though technically I’m not supposed to. I have this need to at least attempt to help others; it’s the emotion that compels me to tell smokers they will get cancer (I’m sure it will get me beaten up one day). Well that’s all I have to say really, I hope you’ll pay some attention to me even though I have a different opinion to you, and even if you don’t at least I tried. Thanks.

 
Comment by Alison
2005-06-15 06:53:00

I am trying to work out how serious you are being, Dick, since you are generating some extreme and crude theories about women. I don’t know if you have been treated badly by women in the past - but even so, you must have a lot of spare time on your hands to construct and manage a website fuelled by your apparent hatred for the opposite sex. I do not consider myself to be a feminist but I do, like any other humane individual, believe in equal rights for men and women - as I can’t see a valid reason as to why men should receive better treatment than women, in any situations.
The reason you may not like the way women dress may be because we have been made to feel that we should dress in ways which we think will please others. If women did not have such enormous pressure to look socially acceptable in men’s usually perverted eyes, then we could wear what we like. I am not saying that all omen hav great fashion sense, as this is simply no true, but with a little guidance all women have the ability to feel comfortable and confident, whilst looking tide and attractive - these are the basic things that matter.
I think it would be fair for me to assume that, no matter what any woman wears, you will never think she looks good enough and wont be able to find it in yourself to respect her, and will probably only ever see her as a sexual object. I think this is very sad, and I can only assume that you must be a very lonely man, in which case you do have my sympathy.
Alison

 
Comment by Dick Masterson
2005-06-14 21:37:03

With the way you so frequently rely on vague allusions to your sexual deviancies, it sounds like more than your mind is open for business, Nicole.

Still, congratulations. You’re only 16 and you’ve already realized that a woman is only powerful when she’s being a cocktease.

-Dick

 
Comment by I Hate Chicks
2005-06-11 12:45:42

“I must stress that this site does not promote hate-mongering of any kind.”

Since you can’t hear me laughing at this comment: HA HA HA HA HA HA HA
HA HA HAHA…

Dude, at least do a GOOD job of covering your footsteps, if a woman can spin off a terribly manipulative lie, a man who is so obviously better than any woman should be able to do a better job of it.

 
Comment by I Hate Chicks
2005-06-11 12:42:19

No one dresses good these days, women walk around letting their massive globules of fat hang over their exposed g-strings and men try and compete in sports with their pants hanging down at their ankles. Regarding clothing, most women I see only want sex out of it by dressing provocatively, not that it helps them look better or anything.

Elliot, don’t besmear Canada with your bile. You obviously do not know the meaning of egocentricism and give up on the “Im gay, therefore people are being prejudice against me.” Thats like a black man getting upset because someone used the old colloquialism “Thats the pot calling the kettle black”
Blessing from God eh? Lets hear those amazing fundamentalists of the Bible Belt read that one. I don’t have anything against homosexuals, or women, or men, just the individual.

Oh everyone, the PRESIDENT of Finland is a woman, and Finland is doing pretty fine for themselves if I might add, I may even move there to get away from the pile of fuming feces and stillborn fetus goo you people call countries in America.

 
Comment by Nicole
2005-06-03 04:02:50

I came onto this website to try to understand why men feel they have to make themselves feel superior to the opposite gender.

I have an open mind as I hope most people do and I certainly did not come on here to attempt to get personal recognition for myself, but to examine all other view points.

And if you are not interested in how women feel about gays on this website then do not bring up the topic yourself.

Your mistaken use of the word “egocentrismâ€? to describe me was probably sparked by the fact that I use the word “I” a lot. This is because I speak for myself; other women have the right to put their own opinions on here rather than me telling them what to think. This is because unlike Dick I do not stereotype women and I accept that we are all different and not all women share my particular believes about equality.

 
Comment by Elliott
2005-06-03 03:21:57

Nicole,
It’s obvious you have a few issues, most notably an incredible case of egocentrism. I never once cited you as a particular example of anything. The “I have gay friends” line is great though. Heartfelt and informative. And I’m Canadian.

 
Comment by Nicole
2005-06-03 02:42:23

So you belive that anyone other than the president of the U.S. has very little power in the world. Why do all americans see themselves as the only ones who matter, women have made a difference by being presidents in many other countries, so why does their contribition not matter just because they are not the president of the U.S.?

As for women hating gays on this site, you obiously did not understand the context of my arguments. I was commenting that if a man did not like a woman appearace then surely he could not be attracted to women and therefore be gay. I have nothing against gays and I have gay friends.

I think you should hear my opinions before commenting that I have the behavior of a 12 year old. Besides its proven that women mature faster than women, so a boy of my age (16) does probably behave like a 12 year old.

So be careful who you are insulting.

 
Comment by Elliott
2005-06-02 17:57:55

I’ve been perusing this site over the last couple of days and find it a mixture of mild amusement and horrific ignorance. This women president thing really gets me though. Of course there have been women presidents, prime minister, etc. throughout history. That’s a fact that shouldn’t have taken someone twentysomething days to rebut. It’s obvious that the author of this site was speaking to the lack of women in roles that can affect meaningfull global change. The vast majority of the names on the above list are of people from countries that truly wield very little power in the world. This holds true for both men and women in those respective political structures (sorry Iceland). To those who point to Margaret Thatcher, she, like Tony Blair today, was merely the vice president to an American man—in Thatcher’s case Ronald Reagan. I’m sure some of the people on this site who have no interest in examining history (not necessarily one gender) would rather look at titles and not ever examine the lack of power that an office or title may hold. Of course there have been women “presidents.” Citing that the president of the Girl Scouts is a women or the president of N.O.W. is a women is a game of semantics.
Lastly, the open hostility toward homosexuals on this website by many of the women is appalling. Trying to belittle someone by suggesting that they are gay reveals one’s opinion of homosexuals. It seems that the “trump card” for the women on this site to play in an argument is to call the person gay or suggest that they are gay as though this “deficiency” explains one’s “wrong” opinion on a given subject. That is prejudice and that is bullshit. As a gay man in the 21st century, I may be particularly sensitive to this but it’s childish and I wish that the ladies would knock it off. Being gay isn’t a choice; it’s a blessing from God. Learning to argue without resorting to the behavior of a 12 year old may be the deciding factor in showing which gender is better than the other.

 
Comment by Nicole
2005-06-02 11:16:34

You seem to be unable to look at the comments for “women president like no fucking way” where I have included a list of women presidents, who I assure you were not employed to be “eye candy” or to “keep a percentage of women in that particular job”.

So here’s the list again:

Sirimavo Bandaranaike, Sri Lanka Prime Minister, 1960-1965, 1970-1977, 1994-2000.

Indira Gandhi, India Prime Minister, 1966-77, 1980-1984.

Golda Meir, Israel Prime Minister, 1969-1974.

Isabel Peron, Argentina President, 1974-1976

Elisabeth Domitien, Central African Republic Prime Minister, 1975-1976

Margaret Thatcher, Great Britain Prime Minister, 1979-1990.

Maria da Lourdes Pintasilgo, Portugal Prime Minister, 1979-1980.

Lidia Gueiler Tejada, Bolivia Prime Minister, 1979-1980.

Dame Eugenia Charles, Dominica Prime Minister, 1980-1995.

Vigdís Finnbogadóttír, Iceland President, 1980-96.

Gro Harlem Brundtland, Norway Prime Minister, 1981, 1986-1989, 1990-1996.

Soong Ching-Ling, Peoples’ Republic of China Honorary President, 1981.

Milka Planinc, Yugoslavia Federal Prime Minister, 1982-1986.

Agatha Barbara, Malta President, 1982-1987.

Maria Liberia-Peters, Netherlands Antilles Prime Minister, 1984-1986, 1988-1993.

Corazon Aquino, Philippines President, 1986-92.

Benazir Bhutto, Pakistan Prime Minister, 1988-1990, 1993-1996.

Kazimiera Danuta Prunskiena, Lithuania Prime Minister, 1990-91.

Violeta Barrios de Chamorro, Nicaragua Prime Minister, 1990-1996.

Mary Robinson, Ireland President, 1990-1997.

Ertha Pascal Trouillot, Haiti Interim President, 1990-1991.

Sabine Bergmann-Pohl, German Democratic Republic President, 1990.

Khaleda Zia, Bangladesh Prime Minister, 1991-1996.

Edith Cresson, France Prime Minister, 1991-1992.

Hanna Suchocka, Poland Prime Minister, 1992-1993.

Kim Campbell, Canada Prime Minister, 1993.

Sylvie Kinigi, Burundi Prime Minister, 1993-1994.

Agathe Uwilingiyimana, Rwanda Prime Minister, 1993-1994.

Susanne Camelia-Romer, Netherlands Antilles Prime Minister, 1993, 1998-

Tansu Çiller, Turkey Prime Minister, 1993-1995.

Chandrika Bandaranaike Kumaratunge, Sri Lanka Prime Minister, 1994, President, 1994-

Reneta Indzhova, Bulgaria, Interim Prime Minister, 1994-1995.

Claudette Werleigh, Haiti Prime Minister, 1995-1996.

Sheikh Hasina Wajed, Bangladesh Prime Minister, 1996-.

Mary McAleese, Ireland President, 1997-.

Pamela Gordon, Bermuda Prime Minister, 1997-1998.

Janet Jagan, Guyana Prime Minister, 1997, President, 1997-1999.

Jenny Shipley, New Zealand Prime Minister, 1997-1999.

Ruth Dreifuss, Switzerland President, 1999-2000.

Jennifer Smith, Bermuda Prime Minister, 1998-.

Nyam-Osoriyn Tuyaa, Mongolia, Acting Prime Minister, July 1999.

Helen Clark, New Zealand Prime Minister, 1999-.

Mireya Elisa Moscoso de Arias, Panama President, 1999-.

Vaira Vike-Freiberga, Latvia President, 1999-.

Tarja Kaarina Halonen, Finland President, 2000-.

That’s a rather large amount considering Dicks “A women will never be president of America or anywhere else” comment. Hurm, he must have miscounted.

 
Comment by jeff
2005-06-02 09:16:20

I hate men like you, is another perfect example of why theres no fucking way a woman should be president. As soon as she hits her p.m.s. time keep the missile button away, other wise we’ll be missing a few countries.

 
Comment by Nicole
2005-06-02 02:56:23

You misunderstood my point, if you do not like the way women dress but like the way men dress then doesnt that mean you are more atteacted to males.

And I am not a gay basher, I like gays. Theres something nice about talking to a man and knowing hes not just looking at your breasts.

 
Comment by I Hate Men Like You
2005-06-01 18:34:53

Get stuffed you bastard…men like you deserve to be shot. We have been fighting for equatlity for yrs and it is dickheads like you that stop that from happening by demeaning women and making us think we’re not worth shit…well, I’ve realised the only ones who are shit are guyz like you

 
Comment by Dick Masterson
2005-06-01 16:21:32

Again with the gay-bashing, ladies? I must stress that this site does not promote hate-mongering of any kind. I also must confess that as a man, I am extremely disappointed in that sort of behavior. It’s bad form even for a woman.

-Dick in Europe

 
Comment by The Duster
2005-06-01 16:20:33

Hating women and being gay are two totally different things. Besides, there si no evidence of hatred, only good ol’ Man-reason that is obviously too powerful for your little brain’s ability, or lack thereof, to comprehend anything. Nicole, I suggest you find yourself a hobby besides making yourself look like an imbecile. May I suggest learning to dress? Thanks for the comment that had absolutely NOTHING to do with the post.

 
Comment by Badkitty
2005-06-01 11:11:43

You don’t have to be gay to be a woman hater.

 
Comment by Nicole
2005-06-01 08:23:49

So if you hate the way women look then does that make you gay?

You shouldn’t be ashamed to admit it.

 
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