Women Invented Taxes: Part 2
It’s getting closer and closer to tax time. I can feel the day coming the way I feel the coming of a bumbling fuck up some woman is about to make at my expense. Like when you’re introducing a hot new lady friend to your man mates and she’s just dying to say something fucking stupid about her dog or her roommate who no one gives a shit about.
If your life is so full of problems, hypothetical house-fat roommate, why not try something different? Maybe cut the Fun Size Cool Ranch Doritos down to three packs a day.
This is the feel of the Bogeyman coming for my money. I don’t know what’s more precious to me, my money or my Man Points.
Social Security
Yet another tax supported institution that exists for women. Social Security is like tampons for old people. Men don’t need them. Men work from the day we’re born to the day we die. That’s where the phrase Men At Work comes from. We don’t need handouts, we just need a broken fence and a hammer.
Technically, women live their entire lives on social security. Also, women live a lot longer than men. If women had the same lifespans as men, they would need to draw double the social security benefits each year to make up for it.
Paying Off The National Debt
There is not one woman in the world who hasn’t floated on a massive credit card balance for at least three months. It is my belief that women enjoy credit. A big red fucking phone number on their Visa statement consoles them into thinking they have some sort of immortality in this world. In the same manner, a man will have a son or will cure Polio. Men carve their names on the stone tablets of history with their cocks.
That is my belief and it is also a fact.
The Army
If there were no women, not a single dime of funding would go to national defense.
Without women, all men would be in the army and our legions would cover the face of the Earth. We would wake to the sound of cannon fire and exploding zeppelins. This army of men would breath fire and break rocks in our hands. The Destruction Derby and colliding chainsaws would be our national anthem and military riches would know no bounds.
War is manly.
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April 11th, 2007 at 11:51 pm - IP Man-Hash: 796c1d8aebfd3
cheers to another brilliant article
April 12th, 2007 at 5:09 am - IP Man-Hash: 1a06cee2bef7b
Hell yes.
April 12th, 2007 at 8:38 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
War is rather a dolt’s resort when a simple preemptive assassination would suffice.
Unless part of your goals are the overkills themselves.
April 12th, 2007 at 9:03 am - IP Man-Hash: 517db8bfd5429
Assasination is feminine.
All the men who’ve been poisoned by sluts throughout history or the two shootings of Carter and Raegan both commited by females?
War is manly because it’s not about killing the leader. It’s about making everything in their whole place fucked up and blown up.
April 12th, 2007 at 11:56 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
Assassination may be womanly.
Wining without a war by one is not. It’s efficient.
As an added bonus, you might even get some broad close to the target to do the deed. With little if any expense to you and without the need for possibly dispensing with a highly trained operative.
April 12th, 2007 at 11:57 am - IP Man-Hash: 980cc8a8ac1a7
winning*
April 12th, 2007 at 12:12 pm - IP Man-Hash: 9d3c6d65d929f
And if you make it a suicide mission you kill 2 birds with 1 stone.
Well done.
April 12th, 2007 at 3:36 pm - IP Man-Hash: bc3ec0b747766
With every new government program created, with every new government alphabet agency setup, with every new complication added to the tax code, some women somewhere asked their pimps in government a stupid question and got a prompt answer.
April 12th, 2007 at 7:53 pm - IP Man-Hash: 1a06cee2bef7b
Oh yeah of course. A peaceful solution is always good, but a war is manly cause its WE DONT TAKE YOUR SHIT NO MORE!
Demonstrated by Hitler when he invaded Poland.