Myths and Lores


Things to be busted.

Why Men Aren’t “Romantic”

Posted in Myths and Lores on September 9th, 2007

Men aren’t romantic for the same reason we didn’t invent a sport called “Drop Rocks in a Hole.”

What’s going to happen next? Is the rock going to fall in the hole? Holy shit! Who wins?

No one. It’s just like listening to a woman. Everyone loses. [Read more]

Female Tourette’s Syndrome: Part 2

Posted in Myths and Lores on September 7th, 2007

Tourette’s Syndrome is not limited to obscene outbursts and shouting. It also includes involuntary tics and gestures, which are sometimes inappropriate.

Female Tourette’s Syndrome is exactly the same; except instead of being classified as a disorder, FTS involuntary tics are classified as a huge pain in the ass.

A 5’4″ woman stabbing me in the face with the spokes of an umbrella, for example, is Female Tourette’s Syndrome. And that is a huge pain in my ass. [Read more]

Female Tourettes Syndrome

Posted in Myths and Lores on September 5th, 2007

I’ve mentioned Female Tourettes Syndrome in the past, and because it is one of the biggest reasons why men are better than women, I thought I would commemorate this Labor Day by expanding on the topic.

Labor Day is a very manly holiday, after all. Labor Day is why Father’s Day is bullshit. You don’t celebrate two Halloweens or two New Year’s. When compared to a day honoring labor, Father’s Day is redundant.

If there was a day dedicated to buying three times as much crap at a 50% off sale, or spilling fancy candle wax all over the carpet, then we wouldn’t need Mother’s Day. [Read more]

Hocus Pocus: Women Are Dumb

Posted in Dick In Your Ear, Myths and Lores on August 29th, 2007

Click below to get Dick in your Ear and listen to the podcast of this article.

The reason women gobble up Feng Shui, healing crystals, and all that other bullshit like pigs at a trough, is because their vaginas aren’t worth shit after the age of 26.

They need something to fill the gap.

Don’t believe me? When was the last time a woman over 26 didn’t lie to you about her age? [Read more]

Rape!

Posted in Dick In Your Ear, Myths and Lores on August 20th, 2007


Why read just one article when you can read the WHOLE BOOK!!!

Buy it now on Amazon.com in paperback or on your stupid Kindle, and make sure you buy it new so I still get a cut of the action. GFY!

Click below to get Dick in your Ear and listen to the podcast of this article.

Women think that they somehow own rape — as though rape itself were a wedding and no man could have an opinion about it.

Actually, that was more profound than I thought it was going to be. [Read more]

Women Want To Fuck Squid

Posted in Myths and Lores on July 27th, 2007

Women are as adventurous with their culinary tastes as waiting in line for a ski lift — a ski lift that leads to the DMV.

Would the lady care for some calamari this evening?

Ew, gross! It’s squid!

How about some veal?

Ew, gross! I care more about baby cows than I do about the African children who mined these diamond earrings!

And everyone knows it. [Read more]

Excuse Me, Waiter. I’ve Got A Woman in my Technology.

Posted in Myths and Lores on July 8th, 2007

The reason 20th century women have entered technology in shrew-nosed flocks isn’t because “oppression” ended. Socrates and Magellan were killed because they were interested in science. That’s the worst kind of oppression: oppression of men.

Death by hemlock and spear is also more oppression than any woman has ever been subject to.

Women love baking and cleaning. How is making them do it being oppressive? It’s like sending a disobedient child to his room with a crate of Twinkies, a keg of Cherry Coke, and more video games then God. [Read more]

Feelings Kill

Posted in Myths and Lores on June 8th, 2007

Feelings are good for you? Wrong.

feelings-kill.jpg

The biggest reason men are better than women is men don’t have any feelings. Feelings are the indestructible sausage cable of shit that tether women to the ground. Feelings are the source of all womankind’s greatest fuckups and inadequacies and also the reason women hate children so much. But here comes something even more shocking.

Feelings kill you. [Read more]