I’ve always wanted to name a phony whore MenAreBetterThanWomen.com’s Honorary Man of the Month. Little did I know today would be my lucky day! I guess I should have read my horoscope, but I’m not a woman so I don’t waste my time reading fucking self-fulfilling bullshit and if I did I would give a fuck about it.

Gentlemen and all the women here who behave like little girls and not ladies and are fucking forbidden from reading this anyway, may I present MenAreBetterThanWomen.com’s Honorary Man of the Month for July:

Britney Spears. [Read more]

Having one leg and being a tremendous bitch have nothing to do with one another in the case of Heather Mills ex-McCartney. Or perhaps they do. I’m unfamiliar with the circumstances that led to the loss of her leg so I can’t be sure.

You see, as a man I have a natural revulsion to celebrity drama-news — something I shall start calling drews because it’s an amalgamation of the two words ‘drama’ and ‘news’ and it sounds completely pointless and stupid. I hate drews like I hate the plague.

Wait, I know how losing a leg and being a bitch could go hand in hand. Perhaps Heather Mills was at a sob-fest for endangered bears and accidentally used a honey-based body moisturizing cream that she stole from one of her hippie friends just an hour before. Every idiot knows bears love honey. [Read more]

Prison is not a nice place. That’s why I would think women love it in there. They always suspect that everyone’s out to screw them anyway. Their mindset is perfect for the Big House. Plus women are annoying.

But why was I not surprised to hear about Oprah v2.0 hawking horseshit about how unfair it is for women to be in prison on television

To regain the thousand Man Points I just lost by implying that I watch or have ever watched either the Oprah show or the Tyra Banks show, let me clarify:

I have never fucking watched either The Oprah Show or The Tyra Banks show. [Read more]

Is it so fucking crazy to have some expectations of your spouse? Or is that the pedophilia of the twenty-first century?

Actually, I guess it is. That explains why so many women-teachers are getting away with molesting thirteen year olds. Women molest kids. Women have all kinds of crazy expectations from their spouses.

Apparently, they’re one in the same. [Read more]

Did you know that a staggering 7% of the top grossing 200 films of 2005 were directed by women? I was shocked as well, but then I remembered that on a slow weekend in summer when it’s hot outside just about everywhere on Earth, even seeing a miserable piece of woman-directed shit is better than sitting around and listening to the house-marm gab about nothing.

Perhaps we’re the lucky men. Perhaps someday women will forget their manners even during film and theatres will sound like hair salons or bird sanctuaries. Then again maybe that kind of shit will actually lower the price of a ticket.

That’s a man for you: always looking on the bright side. [Read more]

Myself and every other man on Earth have been saying it for years: alimony is fucked — and it’s extremely sexist.

But wait, what about this?

Did you know you’re liable for child support if you knock some slut up who lies about being on the pill and then doesn’t want to have an abortion because of some ridiculous shit like she suddenly has “principles” or because her mother didn’t abort her? Well you are liable for that cash cow and it’s the biggest croc of shit and injustice that could ever be imagined. [Read more]

There’s a little court in America called the Supreme Court. For the most part, it is taken quite seriously. If courts were road construction, then the Supreme Court would be a collapsed freeway on top of a volcano. In other words, if you fuck up at the SC, then you’re fucked, pal. Unless you have some pull with God Himself, you just got busted for tacit collusion, plagiarism, or kiddie porn — whatever’s your poison, and now you are taking your man-ass to prison.

A recent trend in America has been to get women the fuck off this Supreme of Courts. That is because women have donkey brains and the attention span of mud. It’s also because women fall asleep during court. [Read more]

I love a good showboater. For those of you who don’t understand the term, showboating is a manly activity that involves behaving poorly during a victory — sometimes extremely poorly.

Hell most of sporting is based on showboating; and just like sporting itself, it takes a man to do it in anyway where it’s worth a shit.

Babe Ruth, Johnny Unitas — these are the champions of showboaters who call their monumental victories in advance with the man-confidence of legend. This week I honor Lindsey “Free Ride” Jacobellis as February’s MenAreBetterThanWomen.com’s Honorary Man of the Month. A woman so committed to the man-principle of showboating that she pissed away a gold fucking medal for it.

Congratulations Lindsey! [Read more]